Thank you - i'm feeling better
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 2
Thank you - i'm feeling better
I would like to thank you all for caring, I can feel concern from all of you and for this I am eternally grateful.
After reading all your comments I woke up this morning with a renewed vigor and determination, my motivation has returned and I started doing some of the chores i'd been putting off, I thought about what do I want and waht is important to ME. This is probably the first time i've ever put myself and wants first.
Thanks to all of you I now better understand the rules about re-hab and am no longer angry, more grateful that they are trying to help him get better. Maybe my problem lay more with they didn't sit down and discuss or explain things to me, I need to sort things out in my own head before I will accept them and I had no explaination from them. Perhaps they need to improve on their induction program.
Denny you were right in as much as all my efforts were directed at him not me, I was addicted to him, thankyou for helping me understand that.
Harleygirl, thank you, you really helped with that lick in the as** thing, I needed that and I was a distraction thank-you. you can be as blunt as you like.
BigSis, thank you for your understanding and compassion, you were right that is exactly where I was coming from.
Dobiedive, you made me ask questions of myself that I never thought of before, I did the research probably not enough yet. But I am very clear I am not a Codependant. I need a sober man in my life that I can rely on, trust and depend on, I need someone to be strong for me instead of me always having to be strong for everyone else. When he gets out if he can't be that person then he will be gone from my life because much as I love him I can't have that for the next 30 years of my life.
Cuttlefish, thank you I would never encouage him to leave, because that would mean I would have to let him go. Your post helped me understand and accept a lot of things. It's like you understood from the beginning whereas I just got angry.
All of you have made me feel so welcome I'm glad that I found you, and that was by chance. I think you have all saved me from a mental instition, at one point I just wanted to be coma-tosed until he got out. But now I feel loads more positive.
Thank you all
After reading all your comments I woke up this morning with a renewed vigor and determination, my motivation has returned and I started doing some of the chores i'd been putting off, I thought about what do I want and waht is important to ME. This is probably the first time i've ever put myself and wants first.
Thanks to all of you I now better understand the rules about re-hab and am no longer angry, more grateful that they are trying to help him get better. Maybe my problem lay more with they didn't sit down and discuss or explain things to me, I need to sort things out in my own head before I will accept them and I had no explaination from them. Perhaps they need to improve on their induction program.
Denny you were right in as much as all my efforts were directed at him not me, I was addicted to him, thankyou for helping me understand that.
Harleygirl, thank you, you really helped with that lick in the as** thing, I needed that and I was a distraction thank-you. you can be as blunt as you like.
BigSis, thank you for your understanding and compassion, you were right that is exactly where I was coming from.
Dobiedive, you made me ask questions of myself that I never thought of before, I did the research probably not enough yet. But I am very clear I am not a Codependant. I need a sober man in my life that I can rely on, trust and depend on, I need someone to be strong for me instead of me always having to be strong for everyone else. When he gets out if he can't be that person then he will be gone from my life because much as I love him I can't have that for the next 30 years of my life.
Cuttlefish, thank you I would never encouage him to leave, because that would mean I would have to let him go. Your post helped me understand and accept a lot of things. It's like you understood from the beginning whereas I just got angry.
All of you have made me feel so welcome I'm glad that I found you, and that was by chance. I think you have all saved me from a mental instition, at one point I just wanted to be coma-tosed until he got out. But now I feel loads more positive.
Thank you all
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: By the sea
Posts: 415
You go Rossie!
Sounds like you've been doing some good, productive thinking! Good for you! I am glad you posted...I hope you keep posting. I look forward to getting to know more about you! Hang in there. Let us know how you're doing, ok?
Sounds like you've been doing some good, productive thinking! Good for you! I am glad you posted...I hope you keep posting. I look forward to getting to know more about you! Hang in there. Let us know how you're doing, ok?
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: somewhere, some state
Posts: 48
Originally Posted by Rossie21 
It's like you understood from the beginning whereas I just got angry.
I like that I can choose when to talk to him...I don't have to call, nor accept calls from him. He is not my 'problem' right now, I am not his free therapist any longer. The 5 day no contact period was a blessing for me in disguise...even though I am/was hurting, I had time to evaluate why I was so quick to agree to the breakup. I'm still angry, but in the last few days I've been directing that more towards my own actions....it was my choice to stay, and my own stupidity to accept all that internal anger and hurt as 'normal'.
Rossie, you're definitley not alone....just like you, i have a LOT of things in my head to sort out. Keep posting, and keep us updated!!!
I like how you caught up on some chores...thats what I was doing with my Friday night, along with job hunting. First step to self improvement, higher pay!
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