Newbie, made the 1st 72hrs-Thanks!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Out Ridin', NY
Posts: 3
Newbie, made the 1st 72hrs-Thanks!
Hello, after 3 failed attempts I finally made it through 3 days-- All of the suggestions and ecpectations I have read were very helpful!
However, I didn't know that how I would react, the shakes, mood swings, and INSOMNIA are much more intense than I expected- different for everyone. Harder than expected.
I'm not sure where the best place for me to participate is because I've had a few issues, I also wanted to be sure everyone here got a thanks from me, just knowing that so many things can be overcome with effort!!
OK, I am a 35 year old alcoholic and have been drinking a LOT daily for about 13 years. I have tried AA in the past but it lust didn't stick with me (maybe this time! Or an alternative to AA.). I developed a narcotics problem on top of the alcohol about 3 or 4 years ago that lasted for about a year-- I have had no trouble at all staying away from!!! Alcohol has really been my problem, I am very unsocial and have a lot of trouble interacting with people.
I'll try to keep this a condensed version. I'm starting to get really scared of the emotions part. Most of the past years are a bit strange from the unclearity of my drunken mind. In the last 2 years I lost 4 people who were very close to me, all were under 30 years old. The worst was my youngest brother (25 years old) who left a 2 year old daughter and a newborn son, he was my best friend and the only person I ever felt completely comfortable talking to.
I know that with all these changes going on in my system there's no way of knowing what to expect, the only thing I am positive of is that it will be hard and WANT to succeed- just don't know how.
Again, THANK YOU for giving me some knowledge ,courage, and a starting point for this change that I realize I am not makeing alone!!!
Best of luck to ALL OF YOU!!! Thanks for listening
~~~Pocket~~~
However, I didn't know that how I would react, the shakes, mood swings, and INSOMNIA are much more intense than I expected- different for everyone. Harder than expected.
I'm not sure where the best place for me to participate is because I've had a few issues, I also wanted to be sure everyone here got a thanks from me, just knowing that so many things can be overcome with effort!!
OK, I am a 35 year old alcoholic and have been drinking a LOT daily for about 13 years. I have tried AA in the past but it lust didn't stick with me (maybe this time! Or an alternative to AA.). I developed a narcotics problem on top of the alcohol about 3 or 4 years ago that lasted for about a year-- I have had no trouble at all staying away from!!! Alcohol has really been my problem, I am very unsocial and have a lot of trouble interacting with people.
I'll try to keep this a condensed version. I'm starting to get really scared of the emotions part. Most of the past years are a bit strange from the unclearity of my drunken mind. In the last 2 years I lost 4 people who were very close to me, all were under 30 years old. The worst was my youngest brother (25 years old) who left a 2 year old daughter and a newborn son, he was my best friend and the only person I ever felt completely comfortable talking to.
I know that with all these changes going on in my system there's no way of knowing what to expect, the only thing I am positive of is that it will be hard and WANT to succeed- just don't know how.
Again, THANK YOU for giving me some knowledge ,courage, and a starting point for this change that I realize I am not makeing alone!!!
Best of luck to ALL OF YOU!!! Thanks for listening
~~~Pocket~~~
NOT EVEN 1 CLUB!!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: When I find myself, I'll let you know!
Posts: 1,835
Welcome to SR and congratulations on your 3 days!!
I'm sorry for all of your losses. That is really hard. Just know that they would want the best for you!!
Keep reading and posting. Give AA another try, or check out other recovery options. You are right, this is hard to do alone. Try not to isolate, keep busy, and don't drink no matter what!!
You are on your way to a better life, one day at a time!!
Missy
I'm sorry for all of your losses. That is really hard. Just know that they would want the best for you!!
Keep reading and posting. Give AA another try, or check out other recovery options. You are right, this is hard to do alone. Try not to isolate, keep busy, and don't drink no matter what!!
You are on your way to a better life, one day at a time!!
Missy
Life is what you make it!
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: The boonies, Wisconsin
Posts: 43
Welcome and congrats on 3 days! That is a great accomplishment! I'm sorry to hear about all the bad stuff you've been through and I know there are no words to make the pain go away...but I can tell you from experience that if you keep doing what you're doing, things will only get better! Good luck and stick around...this place is awesome!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: fumbling towards ecstasy
Posts: 2,551
Welcome to SR, Pocket. Glad you're here. 
I could get sober on my own, but AA is what has KEPT me sober. AA is a way to work through the inner stuff, too, like grief and wreckage from my past - things that would get me drunk or high without help.
Congrats on your three days. That's great!
I could get sober on my own, but AA is what has KEPT me sober. AA is a way to work through the inner stuff, too, like grief and wreckage from my past - things that would get me drunk or high without help.
Congrats on your three days. That's great!
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Hello....
Another day or 2 should finish the physical part of de tox.
AA helped me with the mental and spiritual. .
Living well and happy is the best way for me to memorilize loved ones.
I am sorry for your losses.
Welcome to SR...
Another day or 2 should finish the physical part of de tox.
AA helped me with the mental and spiritual. .
Living well and happy is the best way for me to memorilize loved ones.
I am sorry for your losses.
Welcome to SR...
((( ONCE BITTEN, TWICE SHY )))
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: manchester connecticut
Posts: 106
Hey Pocket,
First, welcome to SR!!
Im fairly new here myself ( nov.19,2005 ), and I didnt believe that an " ON LINE "
recovery group would be affective at all, infact I wasnt even looking for it, just sort of stumbled upon it. However today I believe that I was led to it by my higher power whom I choose to call god. Nevertheless, Im here and glad you are too!
Keep posting pocket.There are many people here with tons of knowledge in anything you can think of. Again, welcome!! and see you on the boards!
Jennifer (( roses2005 ))
First, welcome to SR!!
Im fairly new here myself ( nov.19,2005 ), and I didnt believe that an " ON LINE "
recovery group would be affective at all, infact I wasnt even looking for it, just sort of stumbled upon it. However today I believe that I was led to it by my higher power whom I choose to call god. Nevertheless, Im here and glad you are too!
Keep posting pocket.There are many people here with tons of knowledge in anything you can think of. Again, welcome!! and see you on the boards!
Jennifer (( roses2005 ))
Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: midwest
Posts: 148
I am sorry for your losses also. It is a tough thing to endure, and I am always amazed at folks who suffer such losses and seem to keep going on. Obviously we are not all so strong. One thing I do know is that when I am clear headed I can enjoy the world so much more. I remember to fill my bird feeders, and believe it or not, just watching them feed and fly around is so comforting. Everyday gets so much better, and if you have to face the emotions of your losses it might help you to move on, if even a bit. We are mostly a bunch of amateur psychologists here, but sometimes it just helps to talk. My best to you.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: New Focus
Posts: 687
Originally Posted by Pocket
knowledge ,courage, and a starting point for this change
~~~Pocket~~~
~~~Pocket~~~
Welcome to SR glad you are here. Wanting to change and having the courage to do it is a great start. Congratulations on three days and look forward to seeing you more!
Take Care
Member
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Melbourne victoria
Posts: 1,975
Hi Pocket!
Congratulations on 3 days, thats an awesome effort.
like Phinny has said, AA does help you to cope with the motional stuff. I used to drink to cover any emotion, and since I got sober, AA has provided me with the tools to live sober and happy! Hope you give it a shot
HUGX
Lee
Congratulations on 3 days, thats an awesome effort.
like Phinny has said, AA does help you to cope with the motional stuff. I used to drink to cover any emotion, and since I got sober, AA has provided me with the tools to live sober and happy! Hope you give it a shot
HUGX
Lee
Soberus Maxus
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Seattle WA
Posts: 298
I cannot even imagine the pain of losing your brother. I drink like you do maybe a little less but for sure a lot longer. I dont do well in groups although I like people. Meetings scare the crap out of me. Usually I drink alone and like it that way. I have alot of pain also from alot of loss. People. 2 animals this year one I loved the most. Teena I ran over in my driveway. It was bad. I know how it is for me but I dont know how it is for you but I can imagine.
What I am choosing to do is not let alcohol win. Because I know I want to let it win and it scares me. Really somewhere in my brain, I want to kill it, I want to drink myself to Oblivia. I really think I would be happiest there.
That scares the crap out of me. How did my brain get to there?????
HOLY **** I must be an alcoholic...I didn't just find out yesterday.
You could make your brother no prouder and you know exactly what he wants. He wants you to be the best human being you can be. If he was the only one that understood you then you know what he would want. I hope Im not stepping on any boundaries and Im talking as much for myself as for you.
But we have people here that need us to be healthy and we have people that arent here, their memories need to be honored be us being healthy. Been 6 days longest streak in 12 years. Yipeee!!
What I am choosing to do is not let alcohol win. Because I know I want to let it win and it scares me. Really somewhere in my brain, I want to kill it, I want to drink myself to Oblivia. I really think I would be happiest there.
That scares the crap out of me. How did my brain get to there?????
HOLY **** I must be an alcoholic...I didn't just find out yesterday.
You could make your brother no prouder and you know exactly what he wants. He wants you to be the best human being you can be. If he was the only one that understood you then you know what he would want. I hope Im not stepping on any boundaries and Im talking as much for myself as for you.
But we have people here that need us to be healthy and we have people that arent here, their memories need to be honored be us being healthy. Been 6 days longest streak in 12 years. Yipeee!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Out Ridin', NY
Posts: 3
Wow, what a wonderful welcome!!
I really appreciate all of your support! The thought of things getting "better" is new and long overdue. Not sure how to reply to everyone so I suppose I'll lump it all together- like a collage of thanks and understanding!
I thought there was no problem drinking as long as it didn't effect work, so after 9:00pm hit it hard and drink as long as I felt like it. Well, in the 11 years at my current job, I've never missed a day except for weddings and funeralls. Just realized there WAS a HUGE problem (actually just took my fist days off, my sleeping schedule is so out of whack-Gotta get it back!). The internet seems like a strange place for this type of help, for me it is a good start. I live out in the "boonies" so my dial-up is tons closer than a town, and being able to read/re-read helps things to sink in and forces me to think. Maybe will ease me ,and others, into AA- which I am completely scared of!!! There are NO boundaries ever, in my book, especially if you're helping!
I wasted too long concentrating on "maintaining" and the negetive that should have been spent trying to find the good. Well, there's an abundance of the good here. You took your own time, despite your own troubles, to try to help. It really makes me feel good and know I have the added bonus of not lettin down the people who helped me on my way!! I don't know, it seem huge to me!! Thanks, and I hope I can be of some inspiration to someone too. Sorry, my mind is really scattered, it will be when I am not so preoccupied and can focus.
Oh, Max Oblivia- I'm sorry to hear about Teena, I've also got a few pets (the cats rule the home...strays-can't turn them away!) they're my daily "family". It's really tough when someting like that happens HATE it when it does. Great job on the 6 days!!!! You're 3 ahead of me....stay there!!! And I hope everyone who has quit already stays out in front!!! You are all AMAZEING to me and have been doing a lot of good for others. Keep helping yourselves!!!
Everyone getting control and their lives back sounds great to me!!!
Thanks always , Pocket!!!
I really appreciate all of your support! The thought of things getting "better" is new and long overdue. Not sure how to reply to everyone so I suppose I'll lump it all together- like a collage of thanks and understanding!
I thought there was no problem drinking as long as it didn't effect work, so after 9:00pm hit it hard and drink as long as I felt like it. Well, in the 11 years at my current job, I've never missed a day except for weddings and funeralls. Just realized there WAS a HUGE problem (actually just took my fist days off, my sleeping schedule is so out of whack-Gotta get it back!). The internet seems like a strange place for this type of help, for me it is a good start. I live out in the "boonies" so my dial-up is tons closer than a town, and being able to read/re-read helps things to sink in and forces me to think. Maybe will ease me ,and others, into AA- which I am completely scared of!!! There are NO boundaries ever, in my book, especially if you're helping!
I wasted too long concentrating on "maintaining" and the negetive that should have been spent trying to find the good. Well, there's an abundance of the good here. You took your own time, despite your own troubles, to try to help. It really makes me feel good and know I have the added bonus of not lettin down the people who helped me on my way!! I don't know, it seem huge to me!! Thanks, and I hope I can be of some inspiration to someone too. Sorry, my mind is really scattered, it will be when I am not so preoccupied and can focus.
Oh, Max Oblivia- I'm sorry to hear about Teena, I've also got a few pets (the cats rule the home...strays-can't turn them away!) they're my daily "family". It's really tough when someting like that happens HATE it when it does. Great job on the 6 days!!!! You're 3 ahead of me....stay there!!! And I hope everyone who has quit already stays out in front!!! You are all AMAZEING to me and have been doing a lot of good for others. Keep helping yourselves!!!
Everyone getting control and their lives back sounds great to me!!!
Thanks always , Pocket!!!
Soberus Maxus
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Seattle WA
Posts: 298
Holy Smokes. Ive only been coming to Newcomers to Recovery. As im new seems like thats where I should be. I just clicked over to help and information. SCARY.
Today is the first Sat. waking up sleeping, OK. Do any of us ever sleep? But not waking up hungover or semi hungover, or partially hungover. Lets just say its almost fun waking up OK>.
Pocket I remember a time 12 years ago when I walked into my bathroom drunk. I used to count exactly how much I drank so I could keep track. Something I learned in an alcohol school. So I had had 6 at that time. Now days, 6 and I barely feel drunk.
But then 12 years ago that was drunk, I was 33.
I sat down on the edge of the tub and cried, I said what are you doing. Your wasting you brain. You have so much potential. God wants you to do great things. Your family needs you. ON and ON.
So I quit, I felt good, I liked it. Then a friend came over talked me into going to the tavern.(poor victim) Somehow a beer ended up in front of me. Dont remember exactly how.
I do remember the wry smile on my friend as I took my first drink. *I thought* Thats what the devil looks like.
I'd made it two weeks.
Since then I quit for two days once because I promised when I started a combine program research program. But thats another story.
I wonder just how much I missed in those 12 years and yet I know exactly how much Ive missed. I wasnt the best I could be in any area of my life. Flat out plain and simple.
Just didnt perform to my ability. One of the things I cant wait to explore is my evenings right now Im bored stiff. But Ive always wondered what the other people did. The odds of me going to AA meetings are fairly small but not written off at all. Id probably enjoy it and make new friends but I feel Im just to private a person for that.
This is a forum that suites me.
I feel like a new baby with all the excitement of life and new territories to explore.
Im also scared and nervouse of the pitfalls and risks. Sitting at the couch drinking is a safe place.
There is not anything I can do about the last 12 years. Wouldnt it be great if you--
Pocket
Found out what it was like to look back at my age not having wasted all that time.
Gona go kick *** on my first Sat Sober Whuuppppeeee!!!!
With all the help around here your leaving me no choice but to succeed. ERRRRRRRRRR
Today is the first Sat. waking up sleeping, OK. Do any of us ever sleep? But not waking up hungover or semi hungover, or partially hungover. Lets just say its almost fun waking up OK>.
Pocket I remember a time 12 years ago when I walked into my bathroom drunk. I used to count exactly how much I drank so I could keep track. Something I learned in an alcohol school. So I had had 6 at that time. Now days, 6 and I barely feel drunk.
But then 12 years ago that was drunk, I was 33.
I sat down on the edge of the tub and cried, I said what are you doing. Your wasting you brain. You have so much potential. God wants you to do great things. Your family needs you. ON and ON.
So I quit, I felt good, I liked it. Then a friend came over talked me into going to the tavern.(poor victim) Somehow a beer ended up in front of me. Dont remember exactly how.
I do remember the wry smile on my friend as I took my first drink. *I thought* Thats what the devil looks like.
I'd made it two weeks.
Since then I quit for two days once because I promised when I started a combine program research program. But thats another story.
I wonder just how much I missed in those 12 years and yet I know exactly how much Ive missed. I wasnt the best I could be in any area of my life. Flat out plain and simple.
Just didnt perform to my ability. One of the things I cant wait to explore is my evenings right now Im bored stiff. But Ive always wondered what the other people did. The odds of me going to AA meetings are fairly small but not written off at all. Id probably enjoy it and make new friends but I feel Im just to private a person for that.
This is a forum that suites me.
I feel like a new baby with all the excitement of life and new territories to explore.
Im also scared and nervouse of the pitfalls and risks. Sitting at the couch drinking is a safe place.
There is not anything I can do about the last 12 years. Wouldnt it be great if you--
Found out what it was like to look back at my age not having wasted all that time.
Gona go kick *** on my first Sat Sober Whuuppppeeee!!!!
With all the help around here your leaving me no choice but to succeed. ERRRRRRRRRR
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Out Ridin', NY
Posts: 3
Hello all, still hangin' in there!
I was curious if there was anyone who has had any luck with an alternative to AA? I really don't want to go but I think I've got a descent start and want to keep going! I feel like I've got to do something or these last few days will have been a waste. Maybe if I were a more social person AA would be easier, I'm not so I'd like to find something else.
AA seems like a last resort to me, it does work for a lot of people- not sure about me. Maybe it sounds so scary because it is such a large resource that everyone has heard of and is advertised so much. It's almost like I'm afraid to fail there because if they can't help me it's over, lost cause. But at this time, maybe my biggest fear is what I need the most. There are probably other programs avaliable that I haven't found yet so that'll be my new focus for now. If anyone has any suggestions they would be greatly apreciated!
Great to have all this support and I can't wait to get a little time in sobriety wise and maybe help someone feel a little better.
~Max Oblivia~ Hope your first Saturday ROCKED!!! Thanks for the posts and giveing me a little glimpse of things to come, they give me something to look forward to experiencing in my own recovery-- stay out front, you're doin' great!!!
Thanks everyone, you're the best!!!! Pocket!!!
I was curious if there was anyone who has had any luck with an alternative to AA? I really don't want to go but I think I've got a descent start and want to keep going! I feel like I've got to do something or these last few days will have been a waste. Maybe if I were a more social person AA would be easier, I'm not so I'd like to find something else.
AA seems like a last resort to me, it does work for a lot of people- not sure about me. Maybe it sounds so scary because it is such a large resource that everyone has heard of and is advertised so much. It's almost like I'm afraid to fail there because if they can't help me it's over, lost cause. But at this time, maybe my biggest fear is what I need the most. There are probably other programs avaliable that I haven't found yet so that'll be my new focus for now. If anyone has any suggestions they would be greatly apreciated!
Great to have all this support and I can't wait to get a little time in sobriety wise and maybe help someone feel a little better.
~Max Oblivia~ Hope your first Saturday ROCKED!!! Thanks for the posts and giveing me a little glimpse of things to come, they give me something to look forward to experiencing in my own recovery-- stay out front, you're doin' great!!!
Thanks everyone, you're the best!!!! Pocket!!!
Life is what you make it!
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: The boonies, Wisconsin
Posts: 43
Good morning Pocket....you're doing wonderful! I've been exactly where you are right now so I thought I'd throw my 2 cents in. I've only been sober for a little over 2 months (this time around) but I too, have been looking into alternatives to AA. The only problem is where I live the only face to face meetings that are available are AA. But I went to the bookstore and I bought a book called "Sober for Good" and it gave me alot of info. about alternatives. The book is actually an interview of a bunch of people that have recovered from alcohol dependancy and how they did it. Some used SMART recovery, some used Rational Recovery, some used AA, (there are alot of alternatives...just type in Alternatives to AA and you'll find some.) Some used nothing except a combination of books and other information. Which is what I have been doing. It's kind of like my own little recovery method, to suit my needs. Oh and coming on here is a MAJOR part of what keeps me going everyday! When I feel uneasy or anxious, I open up a good recovery book and soak up all the info. like a sponge!
I hope this helped a little...good luck, and have a great, sober day
I hope this helped a little...good luck, and have a great, sober day
NOT EVEN 1 CLUB!!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: When I find myself, I'll let you know!
Posts: 1,835
((Pocket)) Good Morning!! I know the fear that you speak of. Not wanting to be around people. I would get to the parking lot of an AA meeting then leave. I would walk in the door and sit down, only to get up and leave, drive around and come back in. It wasn't easy for me to reach out for help. But I did it and the results are amazing.
Not trying to push AA on you. Other recovery programs work also. This is just my experience. Wanted to let you know that many people have felt the same way you are feeling.
The face to face meetings are wonderful. You can no longer isolate yourself. People in the meetings understand and want to help you. Newcomers are the most important people in the meetings. They show us where we use to be and we show them the way to a better life!!
AA has made me REAL. I had to start being honest with myself and with others. You can't BS a BSer!! LOL They help me to straighten out my thoughts when my thoughts are a little less then rational!!
Just find something that works for you. Lots of people have thought they would be the exception for AA not working. Only to be amazed they were not!!
Hugs,
Missy
Not trying to push AA on you. Other recovery programs work also. This is just my experience. Wanted to let you know that many people have felt the same way you are feeling.
The face to face meetings are wonderful. You can no longer isolate yourself. People in the meetings understand and want to help you. Newcomers are the most important people in the meetings. They show us where we use to be and we show them the way to a better life!!
AA has made me REAL. I had to start being honest with myself and with others. You can't BS a BSer!! LOL They help me to straighten out my thoughts when my thoughts are a little less then rational!!
Just find something that works for you. Lots of people have thought they would be the exception for AA not working. Only to be amazed they were not!!
Hugs,
Missy
Soberus Maxus
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Seattle WA
Posts: 298
My hands wont type this morning. Yawn. Or is it my brain wont kick in. I think Im at the what have I done to myself stage. Sorry for the pity party but I should let it out. Thats what Im doing here is getting it off my chest. However muscular and strong it is. Yesterday was not fun. But was it funner than being drunk? Well now ok if you put it that way. Well it just wasnt fun either way. The good thing is I didnt drink. The other good thing is 7 days. The bad thing is it wore me out. Ive gota recharge. Anyone got a plug in for my battery. At least I didnt dream about booze. Dreamt about poker. LOL I tell you though when my wife brought me that plate of spagetti all I saw was a bottle of wine. Pity party winer. Sheewww Ok I think Ive got it out of my system.
Pocket Lil Missy, sounds like me to the T, Lil Miss you have alot of courage. I feel your determination. I admire it so much. I can just see myself in the parking lot turning around. But once I got in I wouldnt be able to move Id be afraid someone would look if I did. I have read alot in here and have not seen one bad experiance written about at AA. Really pretty amazing. I see where you dont always have the determination on your own and a little kick might be needed to get you over the hump.
I should look at this stage as a good thing and see what I can learn from it.
One thing I know about ex-alchys there tough as nails now I know why.
Pocket Lil Missy, sounds like me to the T, Lil Miss you have alot of courage. I feel your determination. I admire it so much. I can just see myself in the parking lot turning around. But once I got in I wouldnt be able to move Id be afraid someone would look if I did. I have read alot in here and have not seen one bad experiance written about at AA. Really pretty amazing. I see where you dont always have the determination on your own and a little kick might be needed to get you over the hump.
I should look at this stage as a good thing and see what I can learn from it.
One thing I know about ex-alchys there tough as nails now I know why.
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