What to expect in 2nd month of sobriety
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2021
Posts: 275
What to expect in 2nd month of sobriety
I've had no problem finding information about what to expect in the first month of sobriety, but I'm finding it difficult to find information on month 2.
As I'm looking at beginning my second month sober, is there anything special to look for?
Can anyone share their experiences?
Thanks in advance! ❤️🤗❤️
As I'm looking at beginning my second month sober, is there anything special to look for?
Can anyone share their experiences?
Thanks in advance! ❤️🤗❤️
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,172
Are there common 2 month experiences that apply to everyone? If there is, I would stress, remembering to watch out for feeling like you have progressed to a point where you can now drink responsibly. This idea seems to occur to many who "know", well kind of "know" that they can't, but the idea seems to have so much appeal, that contrary to all that is known about alcoholism, they feel so good that they think they are the exception to the rule.
With one month under my belt, I knew I was done with alcohol, but I was still nervous about some unpredictable situation that would cause me to drink. So all my actions had to be overridden by The Prime Directive (think StarTrek); DO NOT DRINK. You can play all the mind games you want, and make all those fubar compromises with yourself, and no matter how good or reasonable they sound, DON'T DRINK! You will then be OK.
Beyond that, month two was like month one, perhaps with a tad more feeling of security. But I never forgot that as alcoholics, all of us will walk on the edge forever. But as long as you observe The Prime Directive, you're going to be OK. I believe my second month was when I focused on learning to get rid of my resentments once and for all. Actually, I won't lie and say I have none, but they are now all manageable, and I do longer allow the squatters to live in my head rent free. But you may have other issues you might prefer to work on.
With one month under my belt, I knew I was done with alcohol, but I was still nervous about some unpredictable situation that would cause me to drink. So all my actions had to be overridden by The Prime Directive (think StarTrek); DO NOT DRINK. You can play all the mind games you want, and make all those fubar compromises with yourself, and no matter how good or reasonable they sound, DON'T DRINK! You will then be OK.
Beyond that, month two was like month one, perhaps with a tad more feeling of security. But I never forgot that as alcoholics, all of us will walk on the edge forever. But as long as you observe The Prime Directive, you're going to be OK. I believe my second month was when I focused on learning to get rid of my resentments once and for all. Actually, I won't lie and say I have none, but they are now all manageable, and I do longer allow the squatters to live in my head rent free. But you may have other issues you might prefer to work on.
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Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: NC
Posts: 5,162
What driguy said.
Don't become complacent. Don't believe the AV when it says you can have just one or you did a whole month you can control it now. etc.
Once you get to the point alcohol is negatively affecting your life I believe you have reached the point of no return. As in we can never control our drinking. Now or ever.
One Month sober is awesome and can be one of the hardest times so Congratulations!
Do Not Drink
No Matter What
Don't become complacent. Don't believe the AV when it says you can have just one or you did a whole month you can control it now. etc.
Once you get to the point alcohol is negatively affecting your life I believe you have reached the point of no return. As in we can never control our drinking. Now or ever.
One Month sober is awesome and can be one of the hardest times so Congratulations!
Do Not Drink
No Matter What
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Back in the USA
Posts: 2,661
My month 2 didn’t feel much different from my month 1 
In fact, for me, each month that went by only slooooowly got better…By month 6 or 7 was when things finally started to improve…again only slooowly did it get there… but it got there.
Keep it up…it will get better.
In fact, for me, each month that went by only slooooowly got better…By month 6 or 7 was when things finally started to improve…again only slooowly did it get there… but it got there.Keep it up…it will get better.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,522
What I remember about beginning the second month of recovery was being so surprised I had made it through a month. I had tried so hard, for so long, and finally I was doing it. At the same time, I knew I was just starting my journey and I had a long way to go.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 173
As month 2 arrived for me boredom was the biggest danger... I found In month 2 I wasn’t thinking so much about alcohol as month 1, so had a lot more free time (it was the first lockdown, soooo a lot of free time). But month 2 can be an amazing month...you can shape what you want your sober life to look like...you can make plans for the money your saving, how healthy you want to be with diet and exercise...start planning for a new job or a qualification....you don’t have to follow through immediately the plans could be for months and years ahead. I found it really important to reinforce my sobriety with positive goals...kept me motivated for the inevitable AV days.
Magsie
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,699
GramCracker, I’ve just been looking through my old notes to see if I could help in anyway. Mine seem to be full of drinking dreams. I think it’s quite common whilst we’re starving the AV from what it wants.
I was told two things that stayed with me in the first few months. (Besides not having a drink)!
Keep to your own side of the street and ……don’t make any big life changing decisions for 12 months (unless you’re in danger).
I was told two things that stayed with me in the first few months. (Besides not having a drink)!
Keep to your own side of the street and ……don’t make any big life changing decisions for 12 months (unless you’re in danger).
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2021
Posts: 275
Originally Posted by DriGuy 
Are there common 2 month experiences that apply to everyone? If there is, I would stress, remembering to watch out for feeling like you have progressed to a point where you can now drink responsibly. This idea seems to occur to many who "know", well kind of "know" that they can't, but the idea seems to have so much appeal, that contrary to all that is known about alcoholism, they feel so good that they think they are the exception to the rule.
With one month under my belt, I knew I was done with alcohol, but I was still nervous about some unpredictable situation that would cause me to drink. So all my actions had to be overridden by The Prime Directive (think StarTrek); DO NOT DRINK. You can play all the mind games you want, and make all those fubar compromises with yourself, and no matter how good or reasonable they sound, DON'T DRINK! You will then be OK.
Beyond that, month two was like month one, perhaps with a tad more feeling of security. But I never forgot that as alcoholics, all of us will walk on the edge forever. But as long as you observe The Prime Directive, you're going to be OK. I believe my second month was when I focused on learning to get rid of my resentments once and for all. Actually, I won't lie and say I have none, but they are now all manageable, and I do longer allow the squatters to live in my head rent free. But you may have other issues you might prefer to work on.
With one month under my belt, I knew I was done with alcohol, but I was still nervous about some unpredictable situation that would cause me to drink. So all my actions had to be overridden by The Prime Directive (think StarTrek); DO NOT DRINK. You can play all the mind games you want, and make all those fubar compromises with yourself, and no matter how good or reasonable they sound, DON'T DRINK! You will then be OK.
Beyond that, month two was like month one, perhaps with a tad more feeling of security. But I never forgot that as alcoholics, all of us will walk on the edge forever. But as long as you observe The Prime Directive, you're going to be OK. I believe my second month was when I focused on learning to get rid of my resentments once and for all. Actually, I won't lie and say I have none, but they are now all manageable, and I do longer allow the squatters to live in my head rent free. But you may have other issues you might prefer to work on.
Regrets...I have many, but through therapy, I've been able to deal with them. I do regret wasting time drinking when I could have been with my grandchildren, that's one that's hard for me to deal with...I'll make sure to bring it up at my next session.
I am nervous about unpredictable situations (like when my daughter accidentally FaceTimed me). There was no way I could predict that on! Working on my recovery plan and reading the plans of others has helped me identify some triggers that I've added to my plan. For the unpredictable, all I have is "DO NOT DRINK!!!!!, which should work until I come up with something more tangible.
Thank you for your great comments!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2021
Posts: 275
Originally Posted by fishkiller
What driguy said.
Don't become complacent. Don't believe the AV when it says you can have just one or you did a whole month you can control it now. etc.
Once you get to the point alcohol is negatively affecting your life I believe you have reached the point of no return. As in we can never control our drinking. Now or ever.
One Month sober is awesome and can be one of the hardest times so Congratulations!
Do Not Drink
No Matter What
Don't become complacent. Don't believe the AV when it says you can have just one or you did a whole month you can control it now. etc.
Once you get to the point alcohol is negatively affecting your life I believe you have reached the point of no return. As in we can never control our drinking. Now or ever.
One Month sober is awesome and can be one of the hardest times so Congratulations!
Do Not Drink
No Matter What
Even though I have decided to never drink, I can see how complacency can come into play so I will make sure to be on the lookout!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2021
Posts: 275
Originally Posted by Introvrtd1
My month 2 didn’t feel much different from my month 1 In fact, for me, each month that went by only slooooowly got better…By month 6 or 7 was when things finally started to improve…again only slooowly did it get there… but it got there.
Keep it up…it will get better.
In fact, for me, each month that went by only slooooowly got better…By month 6 or 7 was when things finally started to improve…again only slooowly did it get there… but it got there.Keep it up…it will get better.
I'll be pleased if my month 2 isn't much different that my month 1, Introvrtd. I know it's a slow process and even though 1 month is a milestone for me, the road ahead is long.
Thank you for your comments!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2021
Posts: 275
Originally Posted by Anna
What I remember about beginning the second month of recovery was being so surprised I had made it through a month. I had tried so hard, for so long, and finally I was doing it. At the same time, I knew I was just starting my journey and I had a long way to go.
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Join Date: Oct 2021
Posts: 275
Originally Posted by C0ntr0ls
I don't remember my 2nd month. My only goal was to not drink now and if that worked, I was good for another day.
Stick with it because it only gets better. A lot better!
Stick with it because it only gets better. A lot better!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2021
Posts: 275
Originally Posted by Mags1
GramCracker, I’ve just been looking through my old notes to see if I could help in anyway. Mine seem to be full of drinking dreams. I think it’s quite common whilst we’re starving the AV from what it wants.
I was told two things that stayed with me in the first few months. (Besides not having a drink)!
Keep to your own side of the street and ……don’t make any big life changing decisions for 12 months (unless you’re in danger).
I was told two things that stayed with me in the first few months. (Besides not having a drink)!
Keep to your own side of the street and ……don’t make any big life changing decisions for 12 months (unless you’re in danger).
I've not had a single drinking dream since I quit, or at least one that I can remember. In fact, if I am dreaming, I don't recall any of then. Which is interesting because while I was drinking, I had incredibly crazy dreams. Since I was a child, my dreams have always been very vivid and on the wild side.
Noted and added to my recovery journal - Keep to my side of the street and no life changing decisions for 12 months.
Thanks again!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 452
I think boredom can be a problem and you have to open your mind a bit and think of healthy ways to spend your time, this is a transitional thing until you settle in to your own groove. I also felt pretty emotional without the alcohol shield.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 710
I found the second month really long.. not sure why. I remember asking here on day 51 how long it would take to stop being obsessed with quiting. Obviously I got the usual 'it is too early' which made me feel even more impatient and frustrated. Like you, my feeling was that I could entertain my new sober me with information of what to expect day by day and week by week during month 1 and then... nothing!
There is no great insight I can provide, just sympathy. It felt long. The novelty of quitting disappears; there are no significant short-term gains. But every day is infinitely better than any of the drinking days before quitting. It becomes a trajectory rather than reaching milestones. Every day not drinking is a day on the right trajectory. Just this morning (2 years and almot 4 months sober) I was reflecting on how much better mentally and physically I felt. I looked at myself at my mirror and I saw myself as an attractive happy person... that thought, after so much shame and self-hatred, almost suprised me. But it is true. You are on the right trajectory now and what you can expect for everyday without drinking is a new morning feeling grateful you did not drink the day before until you are actually happy to meet yourself in the mirror.
There is no great insight I can provide, just sympathy. It felt long. The novelty of quitting disappears; there are no significant short-term gains. But every day is infinitely better than any of the drinking days before quitting. It becomes a trajectory rather than reaching milestones. Every day not drinking is a day on the right trajectory. Just this morning (2 years and almot 4 months sober) I was reflecting on how much better mentally and physically I felt. I looked at myself at my mirror and I saw myself as an attractive happy person... that thought, after so much shame and self-hatred, almost suprised me. But it is true. You are on the right trajectory now and what you can expect for everyday without drinking is a new morning feeling grateful you did not drink the day before until you are actually happy to meet yourself in the mirror.
Member
Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,951
As Fishkiller says, don’t become complacent. I’m nearly at 3 years and still have cravings, so 2 months is a risky time.
My biggest memory is how certain situations are massive triggers. I had a family issue on day 55, and every cell in my body cried out for alcohol. I also flew abroad in month 2 or 3, and the triggers all kicked in. I wasn’t particularly prepared, and it was more by luck that I didn’t drink.
My biggest memory is how certain situations are massive triggers. I had a family issue on day 55, and every cell in my body cried out for alcohol. I also flew abroad in month 2 or 3, and the triggers all kicked in. I wasn’t particularly prepared, and it was more by luck that I didn’t drink.
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