Today I buried my brother.
Here and now
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Toronto
Posts: 334
Today I buried my brother.
Hey everyone,
Today was the day I have been dreading since august 11th when my brother took his own life. I am very sad and emotionally drained, and just feel numb and overwhelmed, it's hard to explain. I feel like part of my past and future have been taken away from me. I feel like I failed as a brother to protect him. I know that's not true, but easier said then done right now. We had a little garden party afterwards with the small group from the funeral, and I was surrounded by booze but have not drank. I am proud of myself, and know every little victory matters. I am going to try to take a nap as I am so tired, more than just physically. I am very grateful for my life, my family, and my memories with my brother, and if he found peace, and the cost is my grief than I will endure this for him. Life is so fragile, hug your close ones and remind them how much they mean to you.
Thank you for always being here for me, you guys are very special to me.
Today was the day I have been dreading since august 11th when my brother took his own life. I am very sad and emotionally drained, and just feel numb and overwhelmed, it's hard to explain. I feel like part of my past and future have been taken away from me. I feel like I failed as a brother to protect him. I know that's not true, but easier said then done right now. We had a little garden party afterwards with the small group from the funeral, and I was surrounded by booze but have not drank. I am proud of myself, and know every little victory matters. I am going to try to take a nap as I am so tired, more than just physically. I am very grateful for my life, my family, and my memories with my brother, and if he found peace, and the cost is my grief than I will endure this for him. Life is so fragile, hug your close ones and remind them how much they mean to you.
Thank you for always being here for me, you guys are very special to me.
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,203
I'm sorry for such a terrible loss Ekohe. I bet your brother would be really proud you did not drink.
You're right about life being fragile, a couple of days ago I visited the grave of my best friend who probably took is own life aged 25. I still regret not speaking to him more often. Take care E.
You're right about life being fragile, a couple of days ago I visited the grave of my best friend who probably took is own life aged 25. I still regret not speaking to him more often. Take care E.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Sending love to you, Ekohe. 
You did not fail your brother. He wouldn't want you to carry that burden.
You should be proud of yourself for not touching the alcohol that was around. True progress & growth.
You did not fail your brother. He wouldn't want you to carry that burden. You should be proud of yourself for not touching the alcohol that was around. True progress & growth.
Member
Join Date: May 2019
Location: Great Lakes
Posts: 139
Ya my mother passed May 15 this year I took care of her many years .
My dad passed about 4 years ago I took care of him 24 7 as well .
I am sorry for your loss .
Only time will heal you .
Try to think of all the good things that you did with those who have passed .
I am glad you did not drink after all this .
My dad passed about 4 years ago I took care of him 24 7 as well .
I am sorry for your loss .
Only time will heal you .
Try to think of all the good things that you did with those who have passed .
I am glad you did not drink after all this .
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