Think I need a meeting...
Think I need a meeting...
I'm sitting in a coffee shop, trying to work on job applications, and the craving has been out of control. I thought I could come here, drink some coffee, and focus. This place has actually triggered a lot more then expected. I'm alone, I used to bring alcohol here in water bottles to get hammered and use their WiFi. My thoughts are everywhere. The guilt and shame is overwhelming. I'm lonely. It doesn't matter what I think or what I do, the AV is screaming inside of me. There is a meeting 1.6 miles from where I'm at and it starts in 30 mins. I've never been to a meeting. No idea what to expect. I just know I can't handle this all night and I'll never sleep if it doesn't go away.
I told myself whatever it takes, it's time to try things I've never done before, things out of my comfort zone. I'm losing my mind and just want to feel normal again. I don't know what normal feels like.
I'm going to the meeting.
I told myself whatever it takes, it's time to try things I've never done before, things out of my comfort zone. I'm losing my mind and just want to feel normal again. I don't know what normal feels like.
I'm going to the meeting.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 2,966
That's also my favorite part. When I can, I get there a few minutes early and have a smoke(next habit I plan on stopping),then will have another after. It's good for me to put myself around 'like minded' people. Helps me deal with the not like minded people, I must interact with on the daily.
How was it?
Honestly I love meetings! I could go on & on. I'm so incredibly fortunate to live near a very busy clubhouse with 5 meetings a day. It is so nice to be face to face with people who really understand. And so diverse...young kids and loads of old timers. It's always interesting.
SR & AA kept me fighting to get sober each time I relapsed and are how I'm staying sober now. Really grateful.
Hope it was good!
Jules
Honestly I love meetings! I could go on & on. I'm so incredibly fortunate to live near a very busy clubhouse with 5 meetings a day. It is so nice to be face to face with people who really understand. And so diverse...young kids and loads of old timers. It's always interesting.
SR & AA kept me fighting to get sober each time I relapsed and are how I'm staying sober now. Really grateful.
Hope it was good!
Jules
Good on ya.
Desperation is an amazing catalyst for change. I'll be forever grateful for that gift of desperation that pushed me to finally reach for help and get to my first meeting.
Let us know how you got on.
BB
Desperation is an amazing catalyst for change. I'll be forever grateful for that gift of desperation that pushed me to finally reach for help and get to my first meeting.
Let us know how you got on.
BB
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Calgary, Alberta Canada
Posts: 467
I'm sitting in a coffee shop, trying to work on job applications, and the craving has been out of control. I thought I could come here, drink some coffee, and focus. This place has actually triggered a lot more then expected. I'm alone, I used to bring alcohol here in water bottles to get hammered and use their WiFi. My thoughts are everywhere. The guilt and shame is overwhelming. I'm lonely. It doesn't matter what I think or what I do, the AV is screaming inside of me. There is a meeting 1.6 miles from where I'm at and it starts in 30 mins. I've never been to a meeting. No idea what to expect. I just know I can't handle this all night and I'll never sleep if it doesn't go away.
I told myself whatever it takes, it's time to try things I've never done before, things out of my comfort zone. I'm losing my mind and just want to feel normal again. I don't know what normal feels like.
I'm going to the meeting.
I told myself whatever it takes, it's time to try things I've never done before, things out of my comfort zone. I'm losing my mind and just want to feel normal again. I don't know what normal feels like.
I'm going to the meeting.
Good Morning all!
Feeling pretty good today on day 6.
The meeting last night I thought was going to be a bust, but because of the friendliness of the community (and me looking desperate), it turned into an amazing experience.
I arrived at the building and there were a couple guys smoking out front. The door was locked so everyone was kinda BS'ing. There were six of us in total. Nobody showed up to chair the meeting so we were locked out.
Three of the people left but one older gentleman said he still wanted to do a meeting and that he came for a meeting. I spoke up and said it was my first time ever attending meeting and it was either here or drinking somewhere. He immediately sat down and three of us had a very informal meeting on the bench in front of the building.
He told us his story, went into a little bit of AA and the steps, talked about steps 1 - 3 a little just to give me an idea of what it is, and the purpose behind AA. We exchanged numbers and offered his ear anytime I needed it. We ended up talking for over two hours and I left feeling relieved because I actually TALKED openly about my problems and somebody listened who has had it a lot worse then me.
He wanted me to come to the 6:30AM meeting this morning to meet his sponsor but I overslept. He left me a voicemail indicating he gave my number to his sponsor (he asked permission last night) and to call him sometime.
I went there instead of the bar or home to drink feeling awful and on the verge of relapse. I left sober and overcome with emotion, just a different kind.
Even if I only use AA as an emergency support system, I see myself returning. I'm not sure where I go from here with it, but I see the potential, and it saved me last night.
Feeling pretty good today on day 6.
The meeting last night I thought was going to be a bust, but because of the friendliness of the community (and me looking desperate), it turned into an amazing experience.
I arrived at the building and there were a couple guys smoking out front. The door was locked so everyone was kinda BS'ing. There were six of us in total. Nobody showed up to chair the meeting so we were locked out.
Three of the people left but one older gentleman said he still wanted to do a meeting and that he came for a meeting. I spoke up and said it was my first time ever attending meeting and it was either here or drinking somewhere. He immediately sat down and three of us had a very informal meeting on the bench in front of the building.
He told us his story, went into a little bit of AA and the steps, talked about steps 1 - 3 a little just to give me an idea of what it is, and the purpose behind AA. We exchanged numbers and offered his ear anytime I needed it. We ended up talking for over two hours and I left feeling relieved because I actually TALKED openly about my problems and somebody listened who has had it a lot worse then me.
He wanted me to come to the 6:30AM meeting this morning to meet his sponsor but I overslept. He left me a voicemail indicating he gave my number to his sponsor (he asked permission last night) and to call him sometime.
I went there instead of the bar or home to drink feeling awful and on the verge of relapse. I left sober and overcome with emotion, just a different kind.
Even if I only use AA as an emergency support system, I see myself returning. I'm not sure where I go from here with it, but I see the potential, and it saved me last night.
Good Morning all!
Feeling pretty good today on day 6.
The meeting last night I thought was going to be a bust, but because of the friendliness of the community (and me looking desperate), it turned into an amazing experience.
I arrived at the building and there were a couple guys smoking out front. The door was locked so everyone was kinda BS'ing. There were six of us in total. Nobody showed up to chair the meeting so we were locked out.
Three of the people left but one older gentleman said he still wanted to do a meeting and that he came for a meeting. I spoke up and said it was my first time ever attending meeting and it was either here or drinking somewhere. He immediately sat down and three of us had a very informal meeting on the bench in front of the building.
He told us his story, went into a little bit of AA and the steps, talked about steps 1 - 3 a little just to give me an idea of what it is, and the purpose behind AA. We exchanged numbers and offered his ear anytime I needed it. We ended up talking for over two hours and I left feeling relieved because I actually TALKED openly about my problems and somebody listened who has had it a lot worse then me.
He wanted me to come to the 6:30AM meeting this morning to meet his sponsor but I overslept. He left me a voicemail indicating he gave my number to his sponsor (he asked permission last night) and to call him sometime.
I went there instead of the bar or home to drink feeling awful and on the verge of relapse. I left sober and overcome with emotion, just a different kind.
Even if I only use AA as an emergency support system, I see myself returning. I'm not sure where I go from here with it, but I see the potential, and it saved me last night.
Feeling pretty good today on day 6.
The meeting last night I thought was going to be a bust, but because of the friendliness of the community (and me looking desperate), it turned into an amazing experience.
I arrived at the building and there were a couple guys smoking out front. The door was locked so everyone was kinda BS'ing. There were six of us in total. Nobody showed up to chair the meeting so we were locked out.
Three of the people left but one older gentleman said he still wanted to do a meeting and that he came for a meeting. I spoke up and said it was my first time ever attending meeting and it was either here or drinking somewhere. He immediately sat down and three of us had a very informal meeting on the bench in front of the building.
He told us his story, went into a little bit of AA and the steps, talked about steps 1 - 3 a little just to give me an idea of what it is, and the purpose behind AA. We exchanged numbers and offered his ear anytime I needed it. We ended up talking for over two hours and I left feeling relieved because I actually TALKED openly about my problems and somebody listened who has had it a lot worse then me.
He wanted me to come to the 6:30AM meeting this morning to meet his sponsor but I overslept. He left me a voicemail indicating he gave my number to his sponsor (he asked permission last night) and to call him sometime.
I went there instead of the bar or home to drink feeling awful and on the verge of relapse. I left sober and overcome with emotion, just a different kind.
Even if I only use AA as an emergency support system, I see myself returning. I'm not sure where I go from here with it, but I see the potential, and it saved me last night.
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