ToyotaMan1991

Hello Guys,

I have a bit of a story to tell.

I was on here about a year ago because I wanted to quit alcohol due to my concern of the health effects. IT lasted about a month, and I started drinking again into oblivion.

I started drinking at age 16,17 but it was more of an occasional weekend thing. I occasionally got drunk, but I didn't need to drink daily, and I often went months without drinking.

The fun began when I was 20 years old. Being a college student and new to college, I did it all. I smoked weed, started drinking occasionally at parties, and of course, got drunk.
In July of 2011, my life took a terrible turn for the worse.
I used to buy weed from a gang member, and I stopped talking to him. He came to my house one morning and engaged in a vicious home invasion to which in response, I started drowning my sorrows in several 24 oz tall boy cans of beer daily.

Never was much of a liquor person, always stuck to beer.

Years went by. 21, 22, 23. At age 23 I started to think of the toll I was doing to my body. Basically from age 20 to now (will be 25 in May) I've been drunk just about every single day. More recently, I have been engaging in my first alcohol free days, several days a week, for the past month or so.

But I feel enough is enough. I'm 24 years old still in undergraduate and will FINALLY be a senior after 5 years in college. I have spent a good deal of my early 20's being drunk, and I lost a 5 year relationship to which I responded by, drinking more.

I want to be clean and sober, and I want to stop drinking. Although I occasionally still do engage in cannabis smoking, I would like to keep it at that for now and commit myself to no alcohol and no cigarettes. ( I Do not use other drugs).

I find it very hard to stop drinking. I am concerned about damage to my health. Luckily, I received an EKG back in November and June of last year, which are normal. I am scared to death about conditions like cancer, bowl cancer, alcoholic cardiomyopathy, and cirrhosis just to name a few.

I'm here because I'm going through a terrible bout of depression, and i want my life back again. I want to live a long life, away from the booze, away from the drunken arguments, away from the **** I have been putting into my body.

I realize I need help.

Advice? I'm depressed, lonely, and sometimes now feel like staying in my room and crying for no reason. I feel like my life is over and I ruined it. I just want to be happy and alcohol free. I can't believe I've done this to myself. I was such a smart kid growing up, now I feel like a man whos old, disgusting and miserable.

doggonecarl

Your college/university may have substance abuse services available for you. Avail yourself to them, or local AA.

As for your hypochondria, stay off of Dr. Google.

ToyotaMan1991

Can I still have a normal life expectancy if I totally stop? Or near it?

Soberwolf

Welcome bk TM sounds like a good time to formulate a recovery plan/programme

There is an abundance of choice il leave a few links to get you started

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

Having support is vital which this community also offers in abundance here are some useful links to some great threads on SR to help you

Welcome bk TM

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html

Bunny211

Yes. You are young. You'll be ok. If there's one thing I wished people told me...and the ONLY thing I wanted to hear....was "Hey, you're gonna be ok. It's all gonna be ok." But, for things to be ok you have to put down the drink.

I highly suggest AA. It's changed my life. I could not do this alone. No way.

ToyotaMan1991

I started taking b1 supplements as well as milk thistle to aid my body. Will these help?

Bunny211

Yes. B vitamins are important...especially for alcoholics. I highly suggest you go to the Dr. and have them run some tests. It will give you peace of mind.

ToyotaMan1991

I did have some tests run back in November. Should I get them done again? EKG normal, liver enzymes surprisingly normal.

mav

The body is unbelievably resilient and has many magic qualities. Based on what you've described I suspect any damage you've done will be entirely reversible and you shouldn't have any long term effects, but...

A) only a doctor can confirm that for you and
B) this will only hold out if quit drinking.

So do A and B and not only will you be fine but you'll actually be better than fine... You'll have your life back.

Welcome to SR... You've found a great place to support you on this. Do some reading and look at some options that are going to suit you.

least

If you stop drinking now, and don't drink again, the chances are good you'll live a normal life. If you've been drinking since you last were tested, I'd ask for them to be done again.

I drank way too much for a couple years and my tests done a few months after getting sober were all normal.

Dee74

Hi and welcome TM

We're a peer support group here - we can't give you medical advice under our rules. We can't really tell you what supplements to take or what damage you might have sustained or what your life expectancy is - you need a medical professional to answer those questions specifically for you and your case

what I can tell you is quitting in your mid 20s gives you a really excellent chance of getting out of this hole with no major damage.

You're well ahead of the curve. I quit in my 40's. I would have preferred to quit in my 20s.

You'll find a lot of support here
D

Wastinglife

I drank much more than you and for much longer. I have no permanent health issues. at your age, you have nothing to worry about.

Hevyn

It's great you are doing this in your 20's - you can turn it all around and have a wonderful life. I, too, drank much longer - and it was every day. Joining SR helped me find the courage to change. We know you can do this, TM. Keep on talking to us.

ToyotaMan1991

Well I don't really know how, but i didn't drink today. As I was taking the train back from school in NYC, I really wanted to grab 3 tall boys for the train ride home. But i said I'm on day one, and I just thought of cardiomyopathy along with all the other damage this crap causes. I steered away from it and bought a fruit smoothie instead. One day down, a lifetime to go. Thank You for the support so far everybody. day one complete. No withdrawal symptoms yet.

SoberLife90

Hey there. I'm in my mid 20s and sobriety is treating me just fine! Your life is certainly not over. Actually, my life began when I got sober when I was 23. To be completely sober I had to completely refrain from doing all substances. For me to smoke just marijuana today would lead me back to pills and alcohol. So it has to be zero tolerance. I come here to SR. I attend AA meetings and I communicate with other AAers daily. I also do my best to work the 12 steps on a daily basis. I went to rehab and that kicked off my sobriety, maybe you could do the same. Sobriety can be achieved if you want it bad enough, but you need to be willing to put that life behind you. Goodluck

Hevyn

Proud of you, TM. Great job on resisting temptation and making it through Day One. It'll get easier as you go along. Keep us informed when you can.

HighDraw18

You can do it man. I'm 26 and putting things down for good. You can do it - just gotta make a solid decision that drinking isn't an option any longer.

The body is amazingly resilient. I'm sure you will be fine in terms of health. Your concerns are most likely unfounded.

DISCLAIMER: I am not a medical professional. If you are still concerned about health see a doctor.

least

I'm glad you didn't get the alcohol and got a healthy drink instead. It gets easier and better the longer you're sober, I promise.

Plure

Good job TM, I think putting your mind to quitting is a massive step that many don't even reach. As far as your health, I'd go visit the doctor (and yes stop with Dr. Google...makes things worse for anxiety). I'm betting you will be fine and at your age your body is still strong and resilient. Hang in there!

ToyotaMan1991

I fell off the bandwagon. was off from school today. got plastered. had 20-25 beers. Drunk dialed people like a fool1 now i'm trying to sleep and I'm having night sweats.

I'm sorry.
tommorow is another day. tomorrow i go back to not drinking . today was a reminder of why I can't drink. i will get better. i know i will. Starting tomorrow I won't even look at that crap. i went a whole week without it. Now let's make it forever.