Could use some help
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Location: L.A. (lower Alabama)
Posts: 26
Could use some help
Trying to quit drinking.
A little background.....(o.k. a lot--sorry) As the name implies, I moved to the Florida Keys back in '00 left in 2009 made lots o money in real estate,LOST a marriage and a couple houses and a ton of money, I miss the houses and the money.
"Keysdisease" if you are unaware is common in the Keys, it is where normal healthy happy folks move there, in short time acquire a drinking or drug habit (as the Keys are like Spring Break at Daytona Beach 24/7--365 and there is little to do outside of drinking and partying--yes fishing and diving, but you can only do that for so long and its not cheap) and leave (if lucky) broke and or broken. Paradise, folks, ain't cheap.
And thats where the story began first few years where fine I resisted or could handle a social 1 or 2 drinks on Fri/Sat only but then with mounting marital and financial problems....a beer after work to relax..... a couple drinks on Friday...and Saturday....and Sunday....and ....and.....
Long and short I live in Alabama now, with my second wife, some good and bad --ups and downs--have occurred in the last 5 years since leaving the Keys, but money is back to very very tight (she has been laid off for 3 years now has worsening medical issues and no new employment prospects)
I don't care for my situation, I am unable to change it at present and drinking numbs it. I know this is not a contest I merely mention it to give example as I am not CLEAR on whats "excessive"... On average I will drink a 12 pack a night during the week and a bottle of vodka or whiskey in a weekend evening both Fri. and Sat....beer again on Sunday. I don't start drinking till after 5 pm. And am almost always in bed before 11, so I am knocking back rather quick it seems... It is effecting my memory, and my ability to function at this point, I still "function" but in a haze, I am either drunk or hungover at all times now. I don't want to "deal" with any of it, and I am just going through the motions each day to get to the next drink that evening........I am under the assumption this qualifies me as an alcoholic?
I came across this forum by accident. But I am a member of other forums (like guitar and motorcycle forums) and they seem very helpful with those things, so I figured WTF? I will give it a whirl.......So, here I am, there I am and hopefully some of you good folks can help point me in a better direction because I seem to be out of ideas.
Thank you in advance for your time in reading all this rambling and for any assistance or direction you may share.
A little background.....(o.k. a lot--sorry) As the name implies, I moved to the Florida Keys back in '00 left in 2009 made lots o money in real estate,LOST a marriage and a couple houses and a ton of money, I miss the houses and the money.
"Keysdisease" if you are unaware is common in the Keys, it is where normal healthy happy folks move there, in short time acquire a drinking or drug habit (as the Keys are like Spring Break at Daytona Beach 24/7--365 and there is little to do outside of drinking and partying--yes fishing and diving, but you can only do that for so long and its not cheap) and leave (if lucky) broke and or broken. Paradise, folks, ain't cheap.
And thats where the story began first few years where fine I resisted or could handle a social 1 or 2 drinks on Fri/Sat only but then with mounting marital and financial problems....a beer after work to relax..... a couple drinks on Friday...and Saturday....and Sunday....and ....and.....
Long and short I live in Alabama now, with my second wife, some good and bad --ups and downs--have occurred in the last 5 years since leaving the Keys, but money is back to very very tight (she has been laid off for 3 years now has worsening medical issues and no new employment prospects)
I don't care for my situation, I am unable to change it at present and drinking numbs it. I know this is not a contest I merely mention it to give example as I am not CLEAR on whats "excessive"... On average I will drink a 12 pack a night during the week and a bottle of vodka or whiskey in a weekend evening both Fri. and Sat....beer again on Sunday. I don't start drinking till after 5 pm. And am almost always in bed before 11, so I am knocking back rather quick it seems... It is effecting my memory, and my ability to function at this point, I still "function" but in a haze, I am either drunk or hungover at all times now. I don't want to "deal" with any of it, and I am just going through the motions each day to get to the next drink that evening........I am under the assumption this qualifies me as an alcoholic?
I came across this forum by accident. But I am a member of other forums (like guitar and motorcycle forums) and they seem very helpful with those things, so I figured WTF? I will give it a whirl.......So, here I am, there I am and hopefully some of you good folks can help point me in a better direction because I seem to be out of ideas.
Thank you in advance for your time in reading all this rambling and for any assistance or direction you may share.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Milwaukee, WI
Posts: 114
Welcome keysdisease!
Kudos for reaching out. You will find a lot of support here--people who really want to help. To answer your question, based on my experiences, it's safe to say you've developed an addiction.
I speak for only my experiences, but I joined AA 13 months ago and it changed everything. I've been impressed by the program, to the core--dispelled my own misconceptions too.
I've heard someone mention Rational Recovery (rationalrecovery.org), which includes a book. I looked into it and the book reviews on Amazon looked pretty solid. For me, AA works because I'm unsure about doing it on my own. But I'm still interested in learning more about this.
I've been here only a couple months, and this site is full of support. Keep posting and keep at it!
Have you two had ideas to solve your issues?
Let us know how things go--we're in your corner
Kudos for reaching out. You will find a lot of support here--people who really want to help. To answer your question, based on my experiences, it's safe to say you've developed an addiction.
I speak for only my experiences, but I joined AA 13 months ago and it changed everything. I've been impressed by the program, to the core--dispelled my own misconceptions too.
I've heard someone mention Rational Recovery (rationalrecovery.org), which includes a book. I looked into it and the book reviews on Amazon looked pretty solid. For me, AA works because I'm unsure about doing it on my own. But I'm still interested in learning more about this.
I've been here only a couple months, and this site is full of support. Keep posting and keep at it!
Have you two had ideas to solve your issues?
Let us know how things go--we're in your corner
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Location: L.A. (lower Alabama)
Posts: 26
Thanks for the welcome and info.
Plans...lets see, we are trying to sell our current home, downsize and pay off some debt/bills that would take much of the financial stress and excuses for drinking away. But to date no offers on the home. :-(
I am trying to quit, not certain if "cold turkey" is the way or a decline......I only had 1 drink last evening (one normal sized not the 1 large 48 ounce glass trick "only one") and 2 Friday evening. I plan on none this evening......but I "plan" that most every evening.
But nothing "formal" as far as plans go to stop I guess.
Plans...lets see, we are trying to sell our current home, downsize and pay off some debt/bills that would take much of the financial stress and excuses for drinking away. But to date no offers on the home. :-(
I am trying to quit, not certain if "cold turkey" is the way or a decline......I only had 1 drink last evening (one normal sized not the 1 large 48 ounce glass trick "only one") and 2 Friday evening. I plan on none this evening......but I "plan" that most every evening.
But nothing "formal" as far as plans go to stop I guess.
If you're looking to stop drinking, this is the place for support and useful info.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
welcome kd, Are you qualified as an alcoholic? Since the NFL draft is coming... Let's just say that if I was picking a team of alcoholics, you may not be a number one pick or go in the first round. You'd probably be a good second round pick. You definitely have first round potential but you need another year or so to develop into a solid hall-of-famer. But I have no doubt you'd be in the hall of fame some day.
I would be wary of going cold turkey, it is very dangerous for someone with your "experience". Consult with a professional - doctor.
I would be wary of going cold turkey, it is very dangerous for someone with your "experience". Consult with a professional - doctor.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Location: L.A. (lower Alabama)
Posts: 26
least, I see you too have dogs. We have 10 (all rescues) .....had eleven.....one was taken from our front yard Friday (this is adding to the wifes---and my-- desire to drink right now) :-(
We hope she was picked up and we can find her tomorrow when the vets open.....she has special needs and seizures so the "oh look a free cute chihuahua" may have worn off fast, we just hope they do leave her at a shelter or vet and don't just abandon her......
Damn life is hard I wish I had gotten a manual, or head start or something.....ugh
We hope she was picked up and we can find her tomorrow when the vets open.....she has special needs and seizures so the "oh look a free cute chihuahua" may have worn off fast, we just hope they do leave her at a shelter or vet and don't just abandon her......
Damn life is hard I wish I had gotten a manual, or head start or something.....ugh
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
kd, sorry to hear about the pooch, you are doing a great service.
just a comment on the life manual, you speak english and our manual comes in japanese. sway it works for them too, their manual is in Swahili.
just a comment on the life manual, you speak english and our manual comes in japanese. sway it works for them too, their manual is in Swahili.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Welcome keys! I too hope you get your dear dog back, & thanks for all the rescue work you do.
I always fell back on drinking when anything emotional happened - happy or sad. Staying numb & foggy is no way to enjoy life. I'm glad you're taking a hard look at what alcohol is doing to you. I used it to cope for many years, but in the end it never did anything but create anxiety and despair.
Good to have you with us - we care about you and want to help.
I always fell back on drinking when anything emotional happened - happy or sad. Staying numb & foggy is no way to enjoy life. I'm glad you're taking a hard look at what alcohol is doing to you. I used it to cope for many years, but in the end it never did anything but create anxiety and despair.
Good to have you with us - we care about you and want to help.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Welcome from a fellow lower Alabama resident. I can set you up in some good AA meetings if that is your desire. Feel free to PM me, maybe we can hit one together? If you aren't sure about AA we can still talk.
Good luck and keep posting.
Good luck and keep posting.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
Welcome, and I hope the little dog finds a safe haven or comes back to you.
One thing I will say is that if you want to stop drinking and recover, you need to really want it because it's not easy. But, it's so worth the effort.
One thing I will say is that if you want to stop drinking and recover, you need to really want it because it's not easy. But, it's so worth the effort.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Welcome Keys. I do believe that when our lives have become entrenched in alcohol habits (e.g. we require a trough of it daily and have no idea how the heck we could live otherwise) we are in a bit of mess requiring a plan, information, folks to chat with about we can, etc etc. SR is a wealth of such things.
Given the reported daily amounts, I'm with LBrain, cold turkey may not be possible as an actual physical dependence is possible.
Glad you're here.
Given the reported daily amounts, I'm with LBrain, cold turkey may not be possible as an actual physical dependence is possible.
Glad you're here.
:-)
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