charliechar84

Hi everyone

Firstly I feel very guilty and embarrassed to be here again. I am a 29 year old woman, seemingly successful. But I am an alcoholic and today really bought this home. I left home for work at had to drink a bottle and a half before lunchtime to ward off withdrawal symptoms. I booked an emergency appointment with my doc who did not give me a prescription but told me to call a community support line, which has given me an appointment on the 8th April.

I need to drink but cannot rock up at work at 9am stinking of wine so I have LIED to get out of work this week to try withdrawing gradually on my own.

Luckily (or not) events last year led to me having to take refuge in my parents' house so at last I have that security. If I didn't I would feel so totally lost.

Does anyone have any ideas how I can get out of this? I used to be slim, pretty and really liked but since the event that caused this I have put on 3 stone in one year and lost my friends.

Nonsensical

Welcome back. Congratulations on your decision to get sober.

Did you explain to your doctor that you are withdrawing from heavy alcohol use? You said (s)he wouldn't give you a perscription but it wasn't clear to me what you had told him or what perscription you are talking about.

Best of Luck on Your Journey!

charliechar84

Hi there, I did do my best to explain, Basically I was having a chat with a colleague and felt that I was about to spasm or have a fit, I never have before but I felt like my vision was going and I could go into a fit. She just gave me a number.... I pushed a little as sadly this is an ongoing problem and I saw another doc last august, and I explained that I really do need do need diazapaem as otherwise I will have to carry on drinking in the morning to get through my day, which obvs impacts on my work etc. I don't know what to do when my doctor cannot help me and the 'Turning point' organisation I was asked to call cannot see me 'til April 8th. What can i do for myself to help things?

My jobs is already at risk; i lied to my boss today so that has bought me until Monday to get ready. I can't tell her the truth as I've concocted this elaborate lie.

charliechar84

the doc knows I drink 3-4 bottles of wine a day and need valium but I guess maybe i am young and a woman and she doesn't take me seriously? I can't work it out

Hevyn

Welcome charliechar. I'm glad you reached out for support - this is a great place where we all understand.

There's no reason to be ashamed or guilty. I hope you realize you have a disease. You suffer from untreated alcoholism. I wish I'd taken action at 29 - I continued on trying to manage it myself. I do think your doctor could have been more helpful - detoxing is dangerous. Maybe you should consider a visit to the ER. I know that sounds drastic, but we want you to be safe.

charliechar84

Thank you, she did say she was in training and went to another doc for advice but still said she cannot give me diazapram. Sadly I have had valium prescribed twice before once by The Priory and I do no get why I cannot get it this time.

I am so worried that I am causing cancer or high blood pressure.

It helps so much knowing that I can talk to you guys freely.

Please anyone, do you have some advice? I want to stop by Monday, so 4 says, currently needing 2 bottles of wine to avoid symptoms.

I really don't want to lose my job and I can' tell them that I've lied about why I need time off

huntingtontx

Welcome to SR. You will find lots of support and people who understand. No need for shame or guilt. We are all with you. No one is here to judge you. Good luck on your journey. Looking forward to getting to know you.

Nonsensical

Instead of telling the doctor the answer you are looking for (valium), perhaps it would be better if you told her you need to detox from chronic alcohol use and asked for guidance on how to do that safely.

charliechar84

I did, she was a trainee and couldn't help apparently? I told her I need two bottles before lunchtime and that i am on the edge of fitting

toddle118

You need to speak to another dr hun, we cant give medical advice but diazepam is not the drug that is used for alcohol withdrawal...The doctor isnt really being very helpful. Either that or get a duty doctor out, it is very dangerous to detox alone. Some people are able to taper it down, but I found this difficult as the minute the alcohol starts working its hard to stick with a tapered down strategy. Definately get a second opinion from and experienced dr x

charliechar84

Oh OK, I do have an appointment with 'turning points' but I've had to take the rest of the week off, I can risk feeling like that again.

If I'm on 3 bottles a day is it safe to detox or should I wait to see the do? Prpb is that I need to be back at work next Mon while doc appointment is next Thurs....

Thank you

toddle118

We arent allowed to give medical advice, we can only share our experiences and everyone is different...I still think you should ask for an emergency appt tomorrow, thats a lot of units you are putting away, you need to have something for the withdrawals as the poison leaves your body x there are many detox articles on the web

charliechar84

`i'm really scared, do you think 8th April is too far? Me appointment today was an emergency one yet all was given was a phone number, no prescription or actual help apart from not to stop drinking yet. I really dont want to ruin my life but they won't HELP me get things back together. I wish I could do it alone but today has shown me it's not safe. Does anyone thing that there is an element of sexism with docs? I feel like I am not taken seriously, but surely a 3-bottle-a-day habit needs attention?? my heart is pounding now already

jaynie04

Hi CC. I think you are wise to be concerned, 3-4 bottles of wine a day is a lot. I have learned that I needed to be my own advocate with doctors, they usually spend less than one day on addiction/alcoholism in med school. I was in a 3 day detox unit at the rehab I went to and the only reason I got meds was because I went to the nurse and complained about a bad headache, my blood pressure had spiked. This was in a facility that was dealing with patients detoxing!

The doc you spoke to was a trainee, please do not be deterred. It is ok to make waves, what you are dealing with is very serious. Things can unravel fast. I would enlist the help of your family or a friend and either go to the er or call and insist that you speak to another doctor.

Your job is important but in light of what you experienced this am your health needs to be front and center. Trying to titrate amounts of alcohol to stave off withdrawal is risky. Not sure about your history with pills, but if that is getting in the way of treatment then I would suggest laying all your cards on the table. Please take care of yourself.

charliechar84

Thank you, this means alot. I know that i am killing myself but why can I not stop? One girl outside this forum knows about my problem and she is being so helpful as has a disorder myself.


If there anyone here who can advise me how to break out of this? I feel like my life is being destroyed by my own hand and that I cannot help it.
x

charliechar84

I've blagged 3 sdys off work and this weekend to deal with this, is that possible, to wean myself off in a few days?

toddle118

Everyone is different, you could try drinking less, but to stop immediately could mean a possible fit, but we cannot say, only a medical professional can...one with experience! If you live in the UK could you phone NHS direct? Im not sure if theyre still running

jaynie04

Charlie, can you go to an inpatient facility? I know you have a good job, but I have heard from others here how devastating effects of detox can be. I am not trying to scare you but I do think you need make this the central issue right now.

Consider this. If you were in a bad car accident you couldn't go to work until you recovered. Detox is a medical issue. There may be fallout. You know what, it was the fallout for me that impressed upon me how serious the issue was. I have a child and I went to a facility for 30 days. Knowing that my drinking created such a disruption has been a big factor in my sobriety.

We can't give medical advice. And no one here can help you figure out if you can detox in 5 days, that is definitely something a doctor should be involved in, there are so many considerations. Could your friend bring you to the ER?

Nonsensical

It's called addiction, charchar, and it's a tough summbeach.

You are in for some unfun days, but I swear to you truly that it is worth it to get free of that bottle.

Welcome to the fight of your life.

You can do this.

Dee74

There's some good advice her Charlie, but none of us are Drs.

See another Dr - be totally open and honest with them.

I think maybe the Dr who wouldn't give you diazepam did you a favour really - drinking and benzoes is bad news.