Welcome charliechar. I'm glad you reached out for support - this is a great place where we all understand.
There's no reason to be ashamed or guilty. I hope you realize you have a disease. You suffer from untreated alcoholism. I wish I'd taken action at 29 - I continued on trying to manage it myself. I do think your doctor could have been more helpful - detoxing is dangerous. Maybe you should consider a visit to the ER. I know that sounds drastic, but we want you to be safe.