it's my birthday I can cry if i want to....
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 51
it's my birthday I can cry if i want to....
Well, today is my birthday. Today I would of gave birth to our 2nd baby that I sadly miscarried in April due to the stress my AH caused me. Today I am giving myself the right to cry. My AH woke up this morning and said nothing about the day as I drove him to work. I am not expecting anything. He spent all his paycheck this weekend on alcohol and spice. So, nothing leftover for even a cake. Yes, I am having a pity party. It's hard to think how I always make him feel like a King on his birthday: homemade birthday cake, putting his name on the local new stations birthday rool, card/ presents, birthday breakfast, and a night out at a Japanese buffet. For me....nothing. Even sober. Today is just too raw with emotion.
Hope this day flies by, and thank you for letting me vent.
Hope this day flies by, and thank you for letting me vent.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 2,899
Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. You know the best way to get a bad day over with? Go to bed early. There is no shame in grief.
I'm sending you hugs, all my good vibes, and my best birthday wishes. I've spent too many birthdays alone and I know how lonely it can feel. We are with you here.
2
I'm sending you hugs, all my good vibes, and my best birthday wishes. I've spent too many birthdays alone and I know how lonely it can feel. We are with you here.
2
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
I'm so sorry - if we were in the same area, I would bake you the most wonderful cake!
I hope you find some time today to spoil yourself with a good book, a fun conversation with a friend, and a new coat of nail polish. Happy Birthday to you!
I hope you find some time today to spoil yourself with a good book, a fun conversation with a friend, and a new coat of nail polish. Happy Birthday to you!
Living in a Pinkful Place
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 7,545
Happy Birthday
I am very sorry for the loss of your baby - please take the time you need to feel your grief.
And when you feel better - please don't wait on anyone to celebrate your birthday ~ celebrate on your own if you want - do something special for YOU ~ you are worthy of it!
special pink hugs!
I am very sorry for the loss of your baby - please take the time you need to feel your grief.
And when you feel better - please don't wait on anyone to celebrate your birthday ~ celebrate on your own if you want - do something special for YOU ~ you are worthy of it!
special pink hugs!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 2,163
I think it's quite normal to still have a slight bit of hope that he will acknowledge your birthday.
Expectations aside, disappointment aside, I understand your hurt feelings.
Holidays and birthdays have a way of slapping us in the face with a big dose of reality. The, " holy crap this is what my life has come to" is a pill we just do not want to swallow on our special day.
I have to agree with everyone, do something special for you today, you certainly deserve it.
Wishing you a Happy Birthday, and may the upcoming year bring peace, health and love.
Expectations aside, disappointment aside, I understand your hurt feelings.
Holidays and birthdays have a way of slapping us in the face with a big dose of reality. The, " holy crap this is what my life has come to" is a pill we just do not want to swallow on our special day.
I have to agree with everyone, do something special for you today, you certainly deserve it.
Wishing you a Happy Birthday, and may the upcoming year bring peace, health and love.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: indiana
Posts: 158
[QUOTE=positivechang;4288565]I always make him feel like a King on his birthday: homemade birthday cake, putting his name on the local new stations birthday rool, card/ presents, birthday breakfast, and a night out at a Japanese buffet. QUOTE]
boy of boy can I relate, having the EXACT same feeling today for the EXACT same reasons. Make your birthday special regardless.
boy of boy can I relate, having the EXACT same feeling today for the EXACT same reasons. Make your birthday special regardless.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,582
happy birthday lady!
what can you do to celebrate that is free???
exercise
paint your nails
style your hair
make yourself your favorite treat
pick some flowers for yourself
play with dog / baby /friends
game night with friends or family
rent favorite movie and have popcorn (can you rent movies anymore?)
what can you do to celebrate that is free???
exercise
paint your nails
style your hair
make yourself your favorite treat
pick some flowers for yourself
play with dog / baby /friends
game night with friends or family
rent favorite movie and have popcorn (can you rent movies anymore?)
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: dublin
Posts: 65
I am so sorry to hear about your baby,must indeed feel raw today.
Forget him,not worth your energy,is there any way you can celebrate your birthday with a friend,or family member,a meal.even a cuppa,cake and chat.
I AGREE ,make that birthday cake you deserve it...HAPPY BIRTHDAY.2
Forget him,not worth your energy,is there any way you can celebrate your birthday with a friend,or family member,a meal.even a cuppa,cake and chat.
I AGREE ,make that birthday cake you deserve it...HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
2 Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 11,481
Happy Birthday, PC!!
Can't get the photo to post, only the link, but I think you'd like this...mmmm
https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/i...8l3zcWGwXGYAgo
Can't get the photo to post, only the link, but I think you'd like this...mmmm
https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/i...8l3zcWGwXGYAgo
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 51
Every single one of you are angels! Thank you so much for cheering me up, and making me feel so special. I can really feel how genuine your posts are, and it means more than you all know.
Honeypig...that cake looks delicious! This is the best place to celebrate!
Honeypig...that cake looks delicious! This is the best place to celebrate!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Gulf Coast, Florida USA
Posts: 5,731
It's chocolate with chocolate pudding and strawberries inside. I spent all day baking it, I burndt the first one. Well actually my hubby baked this one. I can't cook or bake very well.
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