Haylee

I've officially made it three days and everything seems to be going swimmingly...except I've recently had the urge just to have a sliver of a pill. I'm hoping my willpower is stronger than this sudden urge. I just want to feel that relaxation, my lower back still hurts and I know even just a quarter of a pill would make it all go away. I hate that I'm even having these thoughts.
I've been so good so far, no major withdrawals (at least none that I haven't been able to handle). Sleep has been restless, but there has been sleep, and that's important. I haven't eaten much but I'm also not hungry. Maybe it has something to do with the weather...it's been rainy so I haven't had anything to do other than watch TV/movies and read. Grrrr this is a frustrating feeling.

Dee74

Remember what you're doing this for - and remember that this is a marathon, not a sprint - it's likely you'll be tempted again. It's really good to get a strategy in place for when trouble hits.

Stick close to SR...I forget - do you have any other support?

D

Haylee

No, not yet, just SR. I was a closet user and none of my friends or family use (that I know of). I plan on trying NA but wanted to get through the withdrawals first.

Nighthawk8820

Yeah, its normal for your addiction to rear up and rage against you since you took away its fun, lol. Recognize those thoughts as not your own, but that of the addiction trying to resume control of you again. It will like to do that a lot over the next few weeks, but as you get stronger, it will become less and less bothersome when it does show up. You can do this, and no pill is worth being a slave to. Does that make sense? Try taking a hot bubble bath!!! You may want to look at starting a fitness plan too, because I really think working out, the endorphin's that is provides, and the overall feelings of well being can be a person in recoveries BFF. Hang in there!!!

Nighthawk8820

I know this may seem terrifying, but you may want to tell come family members and let them know you are struggling and want to change. This provides support (in theory) and also keeps us accountable for our choices, so we are just left to rely on our own devices and will power. Something to consider.

visch1

Hi. If it were me I'd be at several meetings by this evening. Then again there are people who suffer better than I do. BE WELL

MIRecovery

For me will power was never enough. I could just not do it on my own. The day I discovered AA is the day I discovered that I did not have to do it by myself

Mukti3

Hang in there, Haylee! I am new to abstinence, too. Try to remember the reason you wanted to stop to begin with. This has helped me. I am rooting for you!

Haylee

So I just did a search of NA meetings in my county and they are such odd hours (none today except a men's meeting at 10PM about a 45 min drive away...and clincher on that one...I'm sans penis). All meetings are so far away or gender/sexuality/"I OD'd and survived" specific. I find that so strange. Is this how it is everywhere?

visch1

Most recovery meetings are AA based so you might introduce yourself as "visiting" until you get "it together" for awhile. BE WELL

visch1

OOPs. Of course stay in touch here also. BE WELL

2granddaughters

I suggest you call NA. Tell them where you are and ask what to do.

I never had a problem getting a drink/drug when I wanted/needed one and it's pretty well the same today if I want/need a meeting.

All the best.

Bob R

Mountainmanbob

Dee74

There are non 12 step alternatives too Haylee

here's some links to some of the main recovery players - if you're interested check out things like SMART and Women For Sobriety:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.

Nighthawk8820

You can attend a meeting online, did you know that? In this lovely digital age, there isnt much you cant do online (except get a copy of your car title, apparently). Google it and find a site you like and make sure its FREE. You should never have to pay for meetings. I attended a few online AA meetings when I was brand new.

Here I looked up a few for you:
NA Chatroom

Online NA meetings, NA meetings - NA Chat