New and Checking In....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Eastern U.S.
Posts: 24
New and Checking In....
Hello -
Just wanted to say "Hi" and check-in. I am one day abstinent, nervous and fearful of stepping on toes. I tried AA and did not care for it (for many reasons). I do not think I am in denial or not humble enough. I am an honest, contemplative person who tries to treat others with kindness and respect. I am hopeful I will find others hear who are open minded and supportive.
Just wanted to say "Hi" and check-in. I am one day abstinent, nervous and fearful of stepping on toes. I tried AA and did not care for it (for many reasons). I do not think I am in denial or not humble enough. I am an honest, contemplative person who tries to treat others with kindness and respect. I am hopeful I will find others hear who are open minded and supportive.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
hi Mukti, welcome to you.
and congratulations on your first day and posting regardless of nervousness.
about the toes? eventually you'll step on some. it's a given. so....you'll deal with it when it happens.
nobody gets through life without stepping on some toes!
good to see you here.
particip[ating daily in a sobriety forum has been my main sober-do-thingie.
stick around!
and congratulations on your first day and posting regardless of nervousness.
about the toes? eventually you'll step on some. it's a given. so....you'll deal with it when it happens.
nobody gets through life without stepping on some toes!
good to see you here.
particip[ating daily in a sobriety forum has been my main sober-do-thingie.
stick around!
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Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Welcome to the secular forum. Just don't step on Cleo's toes when she is wearing her new louboutins. 
I hope you're reading about some of the great non-12-step options that are explained in this section of the SR forums. So much good information. Read, read, read and ask questions. Knowledge is empowering.
You can do this!
Good luck on this journey.
I hope you're reading about some of the great non-12-step options that are explained in this section of the SR forums. So much good information. Read, read, read and ask questions. Knowledge is empowering.
You can do this!
Good luck on this journey.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Pennsburg, Pa.
Posts: 389
Hello Mukti and welcome !
I like this forum, for a wider perspective of sobriety and recovery. I have some issues with AA, but do incorporate some of the thoughts and attitudes. Day 1 can be tough, but,
in my experience, there is strong resolve which can be the catalyst for the "one day at a time" practice. Keep it up !
raku
I like this forum, for a wider perspective of sobriety and recovery. I have some issues with AA, but do incorporate some of the thoughts and attitudes. Day 1 can be tough, but,
in my experience, there is strong resolve which can be the catalyst for the "one day at a time" practice. Keep it up !
raku
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 196
hello
Originally Posted by Mukti3 
Hello -
Just wanted to say "Hi" and check-in. I am one day abstinent, nervous and fearful of stepping on toes. I tried AA and did not care for it (for many reasons). I do not think I am in denial or not humble enough. I am an honest, contemplative person who tries to treat others with kindness and respect. I am hopeful I will find others hear who are open minded and supportive.
Just wanted to say "Hi" and check-in. I am one day abstinent, nervous and fearful of stepping on toes. I tried AA and did not care for it (for many reasons). I do not think I am in denial or not humble enough. I am an honest, contemplative person who tries to treat others with kindness and respect. I am hopeful I will find others hear who are open minded and supportive.
I am quite new to this forum too...after 4 years of AA and getting nowhere fast I am now for the first time in a long time on day 5 sover!!!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 196
Avrt
Originally Posted by freshstart57
Hi Mukti. Welcome! Read and post, OK? You can get sober and stay sober for good, I just betcha. Onward!
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
This AVRT is a mind game, and you get to make up aaaaall the rules, so you can't help but win.
I imagined that my AV was like an old girlfriend I once had that made me miserable at the end. She lied to me, she cheated on me, she stole from me, she made me feel like a piece of rubbish. Just like vodka, check check check and check. What would I do if she were ever to appear at my door? Absolutely nothing. I would smile, look away and close the door, because there is absolutely nothing that would ever make me have anything to do with her ever again. No engagement, no discussion, no arguments, no tears, no emotion, all that has already happened and I will have no more of it.
So, I decided that since I had done this scorched earth separation thing before, I could do it again. I did it with alcohol.
I know that some of us have used another image, maybe a three year old in their care that wants chocolate and crisps and is throwing a temper tantrum at every opportunity. Most kids get a time out until they settle down and understand that when Mum says no, she means it. On the other hand, throwing candy at a child to stop the screaming only leads to more demands, and attempts at reasoning with unreasonable demands is pointless.
What I am getting at is that you get to choose how you separate from your AV. You are in control of your actions. Keep that Big Plan in mind, your vow to remain sober for good, no matter what. Believe that you are able to deal with any eventuality and set your confidence in yourself all the way up to 11.
You are doing just great, SunnyC5. It will get easier for you as time goes on, but when you are challenged by your AV as you will be, it is still of no matter. The reason that it doesn't matter what your AV does, is simply that you have that BP firmly in place.
There is a certain peace that comes from knowing that your AV really is powerless, not you. It is powerless over you, because you say so, and when Mum says no, she means it. Onward!
I imagined that my AV was like an old girlfriend I once had that made me miserable at the end. She lied to me, she cheated on me, she stole from me, she made me feel like a piece of rubbish. Just like vodka, check check check and check. What would I do if she were ever to appear at my door? Absolutely nothing. I would smile, look away and close the door, because there is absolutely nothing that would ever make me have anything to do with her ever again. No engagement, no discussion, no arguments, no tears, no emotion, all that has already happened and I will have no more of it.
So, I decided that since I had done this scorched earth separation thing before, I could do it again. I did it with alcohol.
I know that some of us have used another image, maybe a three year old in their care that wants chocolate and crisps and is throwing a temper tantrum at every opportunity. Most kids get a time out until they settle down and understand that when Mum says no, she means it. On the other hand, throwing candy at a child to stop the screaming only leads to more demands, and attempts at reasoning with unreasonable demands is pointless.
What I am getting at is that you get to choose how you separate from your AV. You are in control of your actions. Keep that Big Plan in mind, your vow to remain sober for good, no matter what. Believe that you are able to deal with any eventuality and set your confidence in yourself all the way up to 11.
You are doing just great, SunnyC5. It will get easier for you as time goes on, but when you are challenged by your AV as you will be, it is still of no matter. The reason that it doesn't matter what your AV does, is simply that you have that BP firmly in place.
There is a certain peace that comes from knowing that your AV really is powerless, not you. It is powerless over you, because you say so, and when Mum says no, she means it. Onward!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Pennsburg, Pa.
Posts: 389
Welcome Sunny and Mukti ! I am relatively "new" as well. Thanks, Freshstart !
I like your analogy...the parent says "NO !" I realize that my having an upbringing that
I was allowed to be pretty out of control (and was left to do alot of my own upbringing)
left me with lots of self-discipline at times and then absolutely none at other times...
To separate myself from the beast, the "I'm just going to do whatever the hell I want to, regardless", is a challenge, to say the least !
Anyone relate ?
I like your analogy...the parent says "NO !" I realize that my having an upbringing that
I was allowed to be pretty out of control (and was left to do alot of my own upbringing)
left me with lots of self-discipline at times and then absolutely none at other times...
To separate myself from the beast, the "I'm just going to do whatever the hell I want to, regardless", is a challenge, to say the least !
Anyone relate ?
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