nostalgia

Hi everyone, I am on my 3rd sober night. Usually I drink about a bottle of wine per night and have become accustomed to loving it. For the past few days I have worked out and stayed sober. I am not having withdrawal symptoms and I feel pretty good generally. Tomorrow my partner and I are heading to a resort up north where we do plan to have some wine. I have been telling myself that this will be a reward. This is the kind of drinking that I want to ween myself down to - a weekend, and special occasions. I am hoping that after this couple of nights at the resort that I am not right back to drinking a bottle per night. What do you guys think? Has anyone had any success in reducing their drinking instead of just quitting?

Xune

I am almost five months sober.

For me, I simply cannot moderate the consumption of alcohol.

The only solution I have found, which is also a solution that gives me peace, is not to drink...ever.

I suppose you should ask yourself if alcohol is causing problems for you and if so, what do you plan to do about it?

nomis

Hi Nostaglia,

I think you will find very little support on this forum for moderated drinking. Almost everyone here has tried this approach before only to find ourselves right back at square one, i.e. hungover and disappointed. Alcoholics can't moderate alcohol intake. I'm not saying you are an alcoholic, but that's a hard question you're going to have to ask yourself at some point.

nostalgia

Hi Xune,

Yes, it is causing minor problems for me in terms of guilt and being afraid that I will not be able to stop. What was your addiction like?

nostalgia

Hi Nomis,

I am asking myself that... but I am not convinced at which stage of alcoholism I am at. I am hoping that this is a bad habit that I can still control with will power. For now, I still feel like I can wake up with a hangover without feeling like a complete failure, just not every morning.

sugarbear1

at 3 days you aren't really sober, yet.

look up kindling effect

Anna

I think you might be able to control it, briefly. I tried that countless times. The first week would be manageable. The second week, I'd obsess to the point of craziness about alcohol and by the third week, I'd be back to the usual.

Dee74

Those few times I could control things kept me baited on the hook.
It never lasted - and I always ended up back at square one...

like I said elsewhere the truth was I was a blackout alcoholic drinker who sometimes had a 'normal' drinking experience - it was always blind luck, never good management.

D

JJay

I've tried moderating or controlling my drinking dozens of times. It's never worked for me. It hasn't worked for me one single time. I have no control whatsoever once I take that first sip. The second I take that first sip of alcohol - and I don't sip, I chug - I'm going to keep going til I black out. That's just how my drinking was. I'd be very careful about trying to moderate or control your drinking if you even have the slightest worry that you might have a problem.

MsJax

Hi nostalgia . Moderation never worked for me plus it is an all-consuming task. How much is enough? Can I have one more? Who realizes? The constant obsession takes up too much of the brain. Quitting requires a whole lifestyle change but God, is it worth it

Melanomagirl

I love wine, too! I'd range from a glass or two to a bottle most nights. I would have waves of guilt and wonder if I had a problem...couldn't decide if I was an alcoholic or just had a habit. I read on here something that hit home...people without a drinking problem don't lay awake at night wondering if they do. In the past I'd use will power and stop for 3-4 days. I'd say I'd only drink on the weekends etc. but no matter what I always slipped back into my old ways. I'm 9 days sober and it feels great. It's easier not drinking at all. I can only think about today...if I think about never having wine again I panic and feel sad. I'm just taking it one day at a time and my goal is to not drink for a very long time. Good luck!!

Redviper

I can't drink in moderation and I know it. Only you can answer this.

TTBABP

Hasn't worked for me so far

Threshold

Been there, done that, had the relapse.

Tried it again. Relapsed again. Stopped drinking entirely, and have stayed off drugs for 11 months and booze for 9. Moderation didn't work for me. if it did I wouldn't be a steady member of SOBER recovery.

Zube

I'm sorry, but moderate drinking does NOT work!

It's like having moderate sex!

Zube

cat1961

Moderation never worked for me although I thought I could handle it at first. I used to be able to hold off drinking till late in the evening and have a pack of beer stretched over a couple of days. Well, those days were over about a week ago and I was on auto-pilot every waking moment to have a beer in hand. My life was consumed around making sure I never ran out of beer and would plan an alternate location to fetch my next 18 pack so the cashiers wouldn't think I'm an alki.

Yesterday I made the decision to give it up again and am now back to controlling my own life and not the alcohol controlling me.

I hope you make the right decision nostalgia.

IndaMiricale

Not if they are a alcoholic.. They may for any length of time, but it will always and I mean always progressively get worse.. Even the best case seniero would be to maintaine it.. And that is a terrible way to live, just thinking your controlling something that wants to go out of control.

The only one that will truly know is you, but I tried that for decades only to loose everything but my life..

soberbythesea

No I have not, been there done that, the only thing I have had success with is quitting. Only when I accepted that I could never drink again did my life start to fall into place.

I don't know your situation, but not many people sign up for accounts on alcoholism forums unless they believe they might have a problem with drinking. If that's the case for you, you may want to think about what benefit those "moderate" amounts of wine are going to really bring you compared to what they may cost you down the road.

Pondlady

Welcome nostalgia,
I could drink a bottle a day too. I decided to moderate, went ok for awhile (although I was constantly thinking about when, how much etc.) but gradually resumed daily drinking. Quit for good in June. Tough at first, getting easier.......so worth the effort

Why not try picking a different reward?

carvel

If I could moderate I'd drink all the time