Counting time... or...
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 176
Counting time... or...
So... in my journey to sobriety, I have decided to do a lot of different programs and what not to ... figure out who the real me is, without alcohol.
I had this idea, after watching a movie called Pay it Forward, to not only count my days, but my improvements as well...
So, I decided... everytime I lose 5 lbs... that's an improvement... if I go up in weight on a training exercise by 10lbs give or take... thats an improvement. If I finish a project early at work, or get a "good job" from my boss, complete a home project, donate or volunteer (something I NEVER did before I was an alcoholic, and decided to work a program).
For instance, cleaning out my clothes and instead of selling them on consignment, I gave them to the salvation army. Randomly doing the dishes for everyone on my floor at the office... stuff like that. Things I don't tell anyone about, but I know that I did them. Things that I know, if I stumbled upon my dishes being done, I'd be like "huh that's cool". It can be something big or small, but it has to be forward progress. I'll even count blessings such as... having a loving girlfriend, whom I would otherwise lose to alcohol.
So at a mere 26 (I think) days sober... over the last two months (the 1 relapse) I have made 129 positive improvements to my life.
That's something that hits me like a truck, and puts life in perspective everytime I think about a drink.
Just sharing! Take care, and thank you SR, you guys are definitely one of my blessings.
I had this idea, after watching a movie called Pay it Forward, to not only count my days, but my improvements as well...
So, I decided... everytime I lose 5 lbs... that's an improvement... if I go up in weight on a training exercise by 10lbs give or take... thats an improvement. If I finish a project early at work, or get a "good job" from my boss, complete a home project, donate or volunteer (something I NEVER did before I was an alcoholic, and decided to work a program).
For instance, cleaning out my clothes and instead of selling them on consignment, I gave them to the salvation army. Randomly doing the dishes for everyone on my floor at the office... stuff like that. Things I don't tell anyone about, but I know that I did them. Things that I know, if I stumbled upon my dishes being done, I'd be like "huh that's cool". It can be something big or small, but it has to be forward progress. I'll even count blessings such as... having a loving girlfriend, whom I would otherwise lose to alcohol.
So at a mere 26 (I think) days sober... over the last two months (the 1 relapse) I have made 129 positive improvements to my life.
That's something that hits me like a truck, and puts life in perspective everytime I think about a drink.
Just sharing! Take care, and thank you SR, you guys are definitely one of my blessings.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Originally Posted by Programmer27 
.....I gave them to the salvation army. Randomly doing the dishes for everyone on my floor at the office... stuff like that.
Things I don't tell anyone about, but I know that I did them.
Things I don't tell anyone about, but I know that I did them.
Helping others to recover / carrying the message is vital to my sobriety.
Many ppl mistakenly spend so much time and effort "recovering for themselves" that they never get around to really helping anyone but themselves......and then their days of sobriety are numbered.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 176
Originally Posted by DayTrader
That's half the AA program in a nutshell right there (don't hold me to percentages..lol..it's just a figure of speech). No wonder you already feel so good.
Helping others to recover / carrying the message is vital to my sobriety.
Many ppl mistakenly spend so much time and effort "recovering for themselves" that they never get around to really helping anyone but themselves......and then their days of sobriety are numbered.
Helping others to recover / carrying the message is vital to my sobriety.
Many ppl mistakenly spend so much time and effort "recovering for themselves" that they never get around to really helping anyone but themselves......and then their days of sobriety are numbered.
The times when I'm doing something to help another person, and I know this is selfish, I'm doing it just as much for myself as I am for them. I would have never had the chance to do any of these things had I not started a program of recovery. After a hard day of work, or doing something as a volunteer, etc... I have been able to sit down, even if for only a short amount of time, and just be completely at peace with what I had done for the day. It's a feeling that I had never experienced before I became a recovering alcoholic, and it's something that I'll never forget.
I guess for however long I suspend myself in the realization that I'm living life to the best of my ability, I am experiencing true happiness. Not the euphoria of the first hour or two buzzed, but a real euphoria.
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 56
Originally Posted by Programmer27
.. but I have discovered something that I believe is a benefit of being an alcoholic...
I've even gone so far as to think that my alcoholism is a gift.
Thanks for sharing Programmer27.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,308
How interesting Programmer
As I read your post, which I loved by the way, I kept thinking of Sheldon in The Big Bang Theory.
To be honest I was much more inclined to do things for people when I was drinking. I was far more generous, felt more sympathy for people, now I really don't care as much.
Washing everyone's cup would have been something I would have done when I was young as part of my people pleasing persona and no point if they didn't know it was me that did it and boy would I be resentful if they didn't get around to washing my cup in return.
The me without alcohol is the person that was not really generous at all as I had suspected all along.
Keep posting
love it
CaiHong
As I read your post, which I loved by the way, I kept thinking of Sheldon in The Big Bang Theory.
To be honest I was much more inclined to do things for people when I was drinking. I was far more generous, felt more sympathy for people, now I really don't care as much.
Washing everyone's cup would have been something I would have done when I was young as part of my people pleasing persona and no point if they didn't know it was me that did it and boy would I be resentful if they didn't get around to washing my cup in return.
The me without alcohol is the person that was not really generous at all as I had suspected all along.
Keep posting
love it
CaiHong
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 176
Originally Posted by CaiHong
How interesting Programmer
As I read your post, which I loved by the way, I kept thinking of Sheldon in The Big Bang Theory.
To be honest I was much more inclined to do things for people when I was drinking. I was far more generous, felt more sympathy for people, now I really don't care as much.
Washing everyone's cup would have been something I would have done when I was young as part of my people pleasing persona and no point if they didn't know it was me that did it and boy would I be resentful if they didn't get around to washing my cup in return.
The me without alcohol is the person that was not really generous at all as I had suspected all along.
Keep posting
love it
CaiHong
As I read your post, which I loved by the way, I kept thinking of Sheldon in The Big Bang Theory.
To be honest I was much more inclined to do things for people when I was drinking. I was far more generous, felt more sympathy for people, now I really don't care as much.
Washing everyone's cup would have been something I would have done when I was young as part of my people pleasing persona and no point if they didn't know it was me that did it and boy would I be resentful if they didn't get around to washing my cup in return.
The me without alcohol is the person that was not really generous at all as I had suspected all along.
Keep posting
love it
CaiHong
Things like compassion on the good end of the spectrum... or even remorse on the opposite end, for say the amount I've lost due to alcohol. I just try to focus on the positive things. I've even told my girlfriend that if I seem like I'm in a bad mood, she needs to just tell me to smile for 10 seconds and see if I don't cheer up a little.
There are times when I'm just randomly unhappy, and I think that's from years of drinking. BUT - I think people would be surprised to find out how much happiness can come from within if you just let it... and this is coming from someone who was a completely pessimistic cynic that relied on alcohol to make me feel happy for just a few hours.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 176
OVER 4 MONTHS yaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyy... haha.
Life really does get better!!!
Not sure what made me revisit the site, but I just felt like reading a few refreshers and day 1 topics to remind myself how it feels.
Good luck to everyone out there! I know it's a never ending battle, but it gets better, it gets easier, you get stronger, and the victories only get sweeter.
"Time is free, but it's priceless. You can't own it, but you can use it. You can't keep it, but you can spend it. Once you've lost it, you can never get it back" ...so do you really want to put off till tomorrow, what you can begin today?
Life really does get better!!!
Not sure what made me revisit the site, but I just felt like reading a few refreshers and day 1 topics to remind myself how it feels.
Good luck to everyone out there! I know it's a never ending battle, but it gets better, it gets easier, you get stronger, and the victories only get sweeter.
"Time is free, but it's priceless. You can't own it, but you can use it. You can't keep it, but you can spend it. Once you've lost it, you can never get it back" ...so do you really want to put off till tomorrow, what you can begin today?
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