Secular recovery

Thread Tools
 
Old 03-21-2009, 11:47 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
sentient puddle
Thread Starter
 
spark42's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Essex, UK
Posts: 180
Secular recovery

Apparently there isn't much recovery here, I find that hard to believe.

I'm sure there is a lot of sobriety here, so i thought it would be a good thread. What works for you? How do you stay sober?

Perhaps it would also be a good place for general advice and techniques for anyone with a drinking problem who doesn't want a religious program.

I'll start the ball rolling! Some things that really help me are;

meditation - namely metta bhavana and mindfulness of breathing
considering the consequences of drinking
cost / benefit analysis
remembering the last / worst drinking bout
sweet treats - especially luxury ice cream
contact with other addicts - either face to face, on the phone, here, etc
reading
endeavouring to be good / kind to myself and others
spark42 is offline  
Old 03-21-2009, 11:59 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Never settle.
 
gneiss's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Under immense pressure
Posts: 1,505
Originally Posted by spark42 View Post
Apparently there isn't much recovery here, I find that hard to believe.

remembering the last / worst drinking bout
Brilliant idea, spark!

I focus on school. Through the worst of my drugs and drinking, even though I did not pay as much attention to school as I would have liked, it was one of the few things I had going in the right direction. I let it slip a little but luckily not to a disastrous level.

When I become tempted to go get some drugs I remember the feeling I had seeing police lights in the rear view mirror and knowing I was drunk enough to get a DUI, had just snorted a line of meth, and had the remainder in the car at that moment. I knew I was going to jail and it was a minor miracle they let me go without even a ticket. As I drove away from that incident something changed it my brain. I was trying to stay off drugs anyway, but that was when I knew I was DONE. And ever since then it has not been half as tempting.
gneiss is offline  
Old 03-21-2009, 12:11 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,876
Spark...nice thread. I think it is so difficult to give others a set of instructions, like aa feels they do on how to achieve lasting sobriety. I don't go to meetings, I don't call other alcoholics, I don't use a sponsor, read the bb or work any steps. What I do is not drink...I have learned to live life without the need to sedate myself. I exercise, eat right, work on improving myself, and live the life I was intended to live. Simple plan and it works 100% of the time. I really dislike the notion that the people who post here are in the minority...facts are more people quit drinking on their own than in any "program".
bugsworth is offline  
Old 03-21-2009, 12:17 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
SR...read/post/chat
AA...er godless
buddhism....meditation and reading of texts
health....eat right get enough sleep utilize the dr and take my medications
dogs
Ananda is offline  
Old 03-21-2009, 12:25 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Eroica's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Htown, baby!
Posts: 384
I use RR and CBA when I get a craving for opiates or alcohol.. And I also try to remember the *horrendous* withdrawals from opiates. I like to read a lot about addiction/drug abuse as a phenomenon as well. For example, a of articles have been published lately about the rise in binge drinking across Europe. That seems to re confirm my beliefs about addiction not just being an internal thing, but also influenced by culture and perspective. I don't know why that helps me lol, but it makes the problem seem more manageable if I separate the "problem" from me, rather than put the me in the problem...
Eroica is offline  
Old 03-21-2009, 12:35 PM
  # 6 (permalink)  
sentient puddle
Thread Starter
 
spark42's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Essex, UK
Posts: 180
Originally Posted by bugsworth View Post
I think it is so difficult to give others a set of instructions, like aa feels they do on how to achieve lasting sobriety. I don't go to meetings, I don't call other alcoholics, I don't use a sponsor, read the bb or work any steps. What I do is not drink...I have learned to live life without the need to sedate myself. I exercise, eat right, work on improving myself, and live the life I was intended to live. Simple plan and it works 100% of the time. I really dislike the notion that the people who post here are in the minority...facts are more people quit drinking on their own than in any "program".
i agree, it's all very individual - the evidence shows there is more than one way to do it, i think it's important to recognise that.

I wasn't aiming for a set of instructions, but thought it would be interesting as a discussion and topic, and helpful too!

Also i thought it would be interesting to hear others' sobriety techniques, regardless of whether it's one day or ten years..
spark42 is offline  
Old 03-21-2009, 12:47 PM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
deep sigh....please translate????
Ananda is offline  
Old 03-21-2009, 01:04 PM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Resident
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Toronto, Ontario
Posts: 4,150
I will start by saying if I drink my wife will leave me and that is all the motivation that I need.
I am creating my own program from several sources.
First source was a combo of the BB and rational recovery.
Phase 1
realize that if I start drinking I am toast and committ to never having that first drink ever. Period. Not negotiable.
Phase 2
Get my self image in shape by exercising and meditating.
The meditating consists of a 4-4-8 breathing exercises only: nothing spiritual
Phase 3
Making amends for my actions.
The only one I hurt was my wife and to a lesser extent my kids.
I am finished with this with my kids and my wife is a work in progress but it is getting better
Phase 4
Getting rid of the things that hinder my life and jeopardize my journey.
Right now I am working on tolerance. There is plenty of spots around here to practice this. I have also reduced my ignore list down to one. This is a definite work in progress with a long way to go. When I have that under control I will identify other things.
Phase 5
This has to do with finding new things to occupy my time other than the bar scene.
I will start on this as soon as I get farther along in Phase 5.

This is as far as I have gotten.
Fubarcdn is offline  
Old 03-21-2009, 08:21 PM
  # 9 (permalink)  
6/20/08
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 4,467
Bugs, I agree w/your post completely. I just don't drink anymore....it simply isn't an option.

SR is crucial for me. Crucial.
coffeenut is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 04:58 AM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Big Idiot Man Child
 
windysan's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: La
Posts: 5,664
I don't do dope.
windysan is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 05:19 AM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Never settle.
 
gneiss's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Under immense pressure
Posts: 1,505
Originally Posted by windysan View Post
I don't do dope.
I like the simplicity of this statement. There's really not much more to it than that: either you do dope or you do not. Thanks, windy (creepy avatar and all )
gneiss is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 08:19 AM
  # 12 (permalink)  
sentient puddle
Thread Starter
 
spark42's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Essex, UK
Posts: 180
Too late to retrospectively edit my original post, but just wanted to add-

"what works for you? How do you stay sober, or avoid picking up the first drink?"

i just think that's a bit clearer.
spark42 is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 09:20 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
yah it takes alot of things for me to just not do it...I guess if "just say no" had worked for me....well i might be a ronald regan fan
Ananda is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 11:01 AM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: France
Posts: 783
[QUOTE=spark42;2158611]Apparently there isn't much recovery here, I find that hard to believe.

I'm sure there is recovery here !
I know I'm recovering, I think we all are. On the road to recovery, say we fall and scrape our knees, that won't keep us off the road, all we need to do is pick ourselves back up and continue.

Now as to what helps...that depends on the day. But keeping busy, never letting myself get hungry or thirsty, never letting myself be in a situation where I am tempted(and that's sometimes tough) Reading SR seems to be working for the moment.

On the road again....
californiapoppy is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 11:03 AM
  # 15 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: France
Posts: 783
PS how come my quote didnt work right?
californiapoppy is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 11:06 AM
  # 16 (permalink)  
Never settle.
 
gneiss's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Under immense pressure
Posts: 1,505
Originally Posted by californiapoppy View Post
PS how come my quote didnt work right?
At the end of the quote there should be a [/QUOTE]. You probably deleted it on accident while you were picking out what exactly you wanted in your quote.
gneiss is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 11:12 AM
  # 17 (permalink)  
mle-sober
 
mle-sober's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Golden, CO
Posts: 1,243
Originally Posted by ananda View Post
yah it takes alot of things for me to just not do it...I guess if "just say no" had worked for me....well i might be a ronald regan fan
Nitpik - It was actually Nancy Reagan who used that phrase in her ad campaigns against drugs. Just to give credit where credit is due.
mle-sober is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 11:24 AM
  # 18 (permalink)  
Member
 
Eroica's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Htown, baby!
Posts: 384
ughhhh ronald reagan.. I'm glad I was too young when he was President to be infuriated at him.
Eroica is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 12:33 PM
  # 19 (permalink)  
sentient puddle
Thread Starter
 
spark42's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Essex, UK
Posts: 180
Originally Posted by ananda View Post
yah it takes alot of things for me to just not do it...I guess if "just say no" had worked for me....well i might be a ronald regan fan
or a fan of grange hill? (british reference)

can't attach images for some reason... Just google "grange hill just say no" and you'll see what i'm on about...

Incidentally i was at a rave / party in the early 90's and "ro-land" was there!

Anyway... Back on topic!
spark42 is offline  
Old 03-22-2009, 12:40 PM
  # 20 (permalink)  
Never settle.
 
gneiss's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Under immense pressure
Posts: 1,505
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCLs0jv_Efk
Grange Hill, Just Say No



[/hijack]
gneiss is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off





All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:51 PM.