Do You Ever Get to Drink Again?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 20
Do You Ever Get to Drink Again?
I am way new to this and still working on day two, so this question is not necessarily for me at this time.
Are there any of you that have finally gotten things "under control" and allow yourself to drink once or twice per month in "moderation?" I have read many posts that say when you are done you are done. For me, it is difficult to think of never drinking again. I am not about to go two days and then drink on the third, but I would like to think that there will come a day that I could have a drink and not get myself into trouble. I have a friend who was a heavy drinker for ten years and passed out on the couch every night. One day he just stopped drinking and, two years later, allows himself to drink once or twice per month. Is it realistic to think that I could do this, or is it just to early to know?
Thanks for your input.
Are there any of you that have finally gotten things "under control" and allow yourself to drink once or twice per month in "moderation?" I have read many posts that say when you are done you are done. For me, it is difficult to think of never drinking again. I am not about to go two days and then drink on the third, but I would like to think that there will come a day that I could have a drink and not get myself into trouble. I have a friend who was a heavy drinker for ten years and passed out on the couch every night. One day he just stopped drinking and, two years later, allows himself to drink once or twice per month. Is it realistic to think that I could do this, or is it just to early to know?
Thanks for your input.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 353
I've tried more time than I can count. Sober up, try to drink in moderation etc... It never works for me. I always end up back at the bottom saying, "What have I done, and why have I done this again?"
I am hoping to stop drinking forever....
Heavy
P.S. My little screen name "Heavy" isn't just because I'm a bigger guy, it's because when I drink I get very "Heavy" weighted down, worried, drunk, nothing good ever comes from it..
I am hoping to stop drinking forever....
Heavy
P.S. My little screen name "Heavy" isn't just because I'm a bigger guy, it's because when I drink I get very "Heavy" weighted down, worried, drunk, nothing good ever comes from it..
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Milwaukee, WI
Posts: 40
I have thought like this before. I've even tried to convince my sober husband to drink with me again. How crazy is that? Me, I don't think I could do it. Even if it was once or twice (or three or four or five) times a month, I'd most likely overdo it. That's just me.
I will give you an example. I thought I could drink like an "adult" so I tried. Admittedly, I was doomed to fail, since I drank with an alcoholic. One drink turned into about 5-6 (who's counting?...not me!) and I ended up passing out, freaking out his neighbor, having the neighbor call the cops and getting hauled off to the hospital. No fun.
I will give you an example. I thought I could drink like an "adult" so I tried. Admittedly, I was doomed to fail, since I drank with an alcoholic. One drink turned into about 5-6 (who's counting?...not me!) and I ended up passing out, freaking out his neighbor, having the neighbor call the cops and getting hauled off to the hospital. No fun.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 1,947
there are times that I want a drink because it's just not fair that I can't drink (in my mind) it's not fair that I can't take a break from life and get drunk.
It's not so much about having a taste of alcohol. If I am getting the desire to drink it's because I want a buzz. i want 3 drinks.
but after I have 3 drinks I want more.
and then I want anything
Maybe someday? I don't know. I would like to think so, but if that's ever possible it is a long way off. right now I want to stop using crack. in order to do that I have to NOT DRINK.
it doesn't look very likely to me that I can be a 'drinker' someday.
for now it's better if I just focus on what i can be, what i am, what is around me, and try to create a life without drinking that i love. and within that life I don't see a whole lot of time beilng spent at bars, or rock concerts.
i need to focus on the change that i want in my life.
It's not so much about having a taste of alcohol. If I am getting the desire to drink it's because I want a buzz. i want 3 drinks.
but after I have 3 drinks I want more.
and then I want anything
Maybe someday? I don't know. I would like to think so, but if that's ever possible it is a long way off. right now I want to stop using crack. in order to do that I have to NOT DRINK.
it doesn't look very likely to me that I can be a 'drinker' someday.
for now it's better if I just focus on what i can be, what i am, what is around me, and try to create a life without drinking that i love. and within that life I don't see a whole lot of time beilng spent at bars, or rock concerts.
i need to focus on the change that i want in my life.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 347
Anyone is welcome to try. I'm always happy to keep a chair open for anyone who went out to experiment with drinking again.
For me... it's not something I'm willing to experiment with. I don't have a 'moderate' switch in my head- for anything. If it feels good- I want more of it.
For me... it's not something I'm willing to experiment with. I don't have a 'moderate' switch in my head- for anything. If it feels good- I want more of it.
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: NY
Posts: 6,608
"Do you every get to drink again?" If you mean me when you say you then I would say no. My drinking days are behind me and believe me when I say I won't miss them. Happier times are ahead.
I am 44 days without today and am very happy the way my life is turning out.
:bounce
I am 44 days without today and am very happy the way my life is turning out.
:bounce
Awaiting Email Confirmation
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 2,942
Yes, I can have 1 or 2 drinks anytime I want.
But here's the problem: I don't want 1 or 2 drinks... I want 10 or 12 drinks.
I've never had 1 or 2 drinks in my life, it was always way more than that.
So, I ask myself, "Why torture yourself with 1 or 2 drinks?"
Another thing I say to myself is that I will reconsider my decision when I am 80.
But here's the problem: I don't want 1 or 2 drinks... I want 10 or 12 drinks.
I've never had 1 or 2 drinks in my life, it was always way more than that.
So, I ask myself, "Why torture yourself with 1 or 2 drinks?"
Another thing I say to myself is that I will reconsider my decision when I am 80.
Sober since 9th May 2008
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 2,973
Hi Jwell, your friend that allows himself a drink once or twice a month. Does he really have A drink ie one or does he get rip roaring drunk once or twice a month.
I too have problems accepting I'll never drink again.
The facts are though that I have never been able to have one drink, always chased the buzz, than chased it some more, then ran it to death.
Can never deal with the hangovers neither so I know the chances are I'll drink again the next day as well, and the next, and the next, hence we find ourselves here.
Dont think I could trust myself to drink once or twice a month, actually dont think at all, I know I couldn't.
At present I don't think I'll drink again, as to whether I do or not ......................I dunno !!!!!
I too have problems accepting I'll never drink again.
The facts are though that I have never been able to have one drink, always chased the buzz, than chased it some more, then ran it to death.
Can never deal with the hangovers neither so I know the chances are I'll drink again the next day as well, and the next, and the next, hence we find ourselves here.
Dont think I could trust myself to drink once or twice a month, actually dont think at all, I know I couldn't.
At present I don't think I'll drink again, as to whether I do or not ......................I dunno !!!!!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,299
I understand how the thought 'I can never drink again' makes it all seem overwhelming in the beginning.I know I fought it for a very long time.If I looked at the rest of my life not drinking, I felt utterly depressed but I was still associating drinking with fun, even though there actually hadn't been a 'fun part' for a very long time.
As others have said-focus on today.It took me a long time to accept that I couldn't 'drink in moderation' and believe me, I tried.I cannot stop at one or two drinks and will never be able to.I'm an alcoholic-plain and simple.
Get through these early days first, focus on making your life a better one as a sober person.I know the initial days can be rough,
Thinking of you,
Jules.
As others have said-focus on today.It took me a long time to accept that I couldn't 'drink in moderation' and believe me, I tried.I cannot stop at one or two drinks and will never be able to.I'm an alcoholic-plain and simple.
Get through these early days first, focus on making your life a better one as a sober person.I know the initial days can be rough,
Thinking of you,
Jules.
Hannitized
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 353
Originally Posted by jwell100 
...For me, it is difficult to think of never drinking again. ...
Don't fret about tomorrow. Just work on this second, this minute, this hour, this day~ That has helped me tremendously. I enjoy living in the moment, which is another blessing altogether.
To Thine Own Self Be True
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: So Cal
Posts: 1,946
Yeah, for me the question is not, do you want to have a drink today? it is do you want to get smashed/drunk today?
Because if I drank at all, I would get drunk!
That is me, I am unable to have one or two, but I know that alcohol is never going anywhere so if I do ever want to "try" I could, I just don't choose to today.
Because if I drank at all, I would get drunk!
That is me, I am unable to have one or two, but I know that alcohol is never going anywhere so if I do ever want to "try" I could, I just don't choose to today.
the girl can't help it
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
I can drink when ever I want to usually not very often at all though. Hell I don't even want to drink. I went over 10years with nothing at all. I have had probably about 10 drinks in as many years. Usually I do not even finish them. Many "quitters" that I know say that cannot have even one or they will get sick again. I believe them...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 20
All of Your Replies are Great
and I thank you all for them.
While I certainly don't know what the next few days or weeks hold for me, it is over whelming to think that the booze is gone forever. So far, this has been much easier than I thought. Day 2 and no shakes, no delusions and no more light headedness. Hopefully, sleeping tonight will be more restful and not as sweaty. I am trying to keep myself very busy with activities that cannot involve alcohol (i.e., stuff with the kids.) Now remember I am only on day two, which I am confident/hopeful will end up well. I may break down, blow up, etc. on day 3, 4 or 5, but I hope not.
I understand the take it at a day, hour minute concept and it has really helped. Last night from 8 - 9 was a personal victory as was 9 - 10. After I do this for a while, and I don't know how long a while is, I see myself trying to drink in moderation. If I can do it occasionally great. If I can't I know the answer to the question I posed.
What are the risks of getting sober for a while and then giving this a responsible try? I certainly don't know, because I have never tried to stop drinking before. My thinking is that I would be in a better place having gotten sober for a while and then trying. If I fail, then I only have to get straight after one night of drinking. Yesterday, I started the process of getting straight after years of drinking.
I appreciate all your opinions on this issue. Having re-read this post, I imagine that it is stereotypical of an alcoholic. "OK, I will stop drinking for a while, but when can I drink again?"
While I certainly don't know what the next few days or weeks hold for me, it is over whelming to think that the booze is gone forever. So far, this has been much easier than I thought. Day 2 and no shakes, no delusions and no more light headedness. Hopefully, sleeping tonight will be more restful and not as sweaty. I am trying to keep myself very busy with activities that cannot involve alcohol (i.e., stuff with the kids.) Now remember I am only on day two, which I am confident/hopeful will end up well. I may break down, blow up, etc. on day 3, 4 or 5, but I hope not.
I understand the take it at a day, hour minute concept and it has really helped. Last night from 8 - 9 was a personal victory as was 9 - 10. After I do this for a while, and I don't know how long a while is, I see myself trying to drink in moderation. If I can do it occasionally great. If I can't I know the answer to the question I posed.
What are the risks of getting sober for a while and then giving this a responsible try? I certainly don't know, because I have never tried to stop drinking before. My thinking is that I would be in a better place having gotten sober for a while and then trying. If I fail, then I only have to get straight after one night of drinking. Yesterday, I started the process of getting straight after years of drinking.
I appreciate all your opinions on this issue. Having re-read this post, I imagine that it is stereotypical of an alcoholic. "OK, I will stop drinking for a while, but when can I drink again?"
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 428
I still haven't accepted the idea of never drinking again. It was a question that I struggled with for the first 30 days of not drinking. I am just over 60 days now and I try not to think about. I figure that I will deal with it when the time to decide comes up. I guess the only way for me to go forward right now is knowing the option is always out there. Whether or not I will give it a try remains to be seen....
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: NY
Posts: 6,608
Jwell100 - You have to find your answer and you will. You may play with it for awhile and then again who knows what the future holds. I guess that's why they say the day to day stuff. Hugs and best wishes. Glad you're here now.
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