Do You Ever Get to Drink Again?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: NY
Posts: 92
This thread has been a wealth of information for me. It seems that all the people that have posted say they cannot ever drink again because 1 or 2 leads to 10 or 12 or that they cant stop at a few. This has really got me thinking about why I first came here to SR. I've only been here a couple weeks and have drank more than I have not drank, but my desire to quit was there. But I guess I am different in that I can stop at 1 or 2 so does that still make me an alcoholic? I don't know. Wondering if I belong here or should I go about my merry way and enjoy the few drinks each night and stop obsessing about whether I have a problem???
There were times when I have 2 or 3 and occasionally would have more (binge maybe once every couple months), but since coming here, I have not drank more than 3 drinks in a night and have not wanted more. Is that too much?? Health wise I think so, but am I an alcoholic because I "want" those 3 beers every night. I know that "normal" people dont' wonder if they have a problem with alcohol, but I've always been the type to over think, over-worry etc. everything. God I am so confused......
There were times when I have 2 or 3 and occasionally would have more (binge maybe once every couple months), but since coming here, I have not drank more than 3 drinks in a night and have not wanted more. Is that too much?? Health wise I think so, but am I an alcoholic because I "want" those 3 beers every night. I know that "normal" people dont' wonder if they have a problem with alcohol, but I've always been the type to over think, over-worry etc. everything. God I am so confused......
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Originally Posted by jwell100 
I am way new to this and still working on day two, so this question is not necessarily for me at this time.
Are there any of you that have finally gotten things "under control" and allow yourself to drink once or twice per month in "moderation?" I have read many posts that say when you are done you are done. For me, it is difficult to think of never drinking again. I am not about to go two days and then drink on the third, but I would like to think that there will come a day that I could have a drink and not get myself into trouble. I have a friend who was a heavy drinker for ten years and passed out on the couch every night. One day he just stopped drinking and, two years later, allows himself to drink once or twice per month. Is it realistic to think that I could do this, or is it just to early to know?
Thanks for your input.
Are there any of you that have finally gotten things "under control" and allow yourself to drink once or twice per month in "moderation?" I have read many posts that say when you are done you are done. For me, it is difficult to think of never drinking again. I am not about to go two days and then drink on the third, but I would like to think that there will come a day that I could have a drink and not get myself into trouble. I have a friend who was a heavy drinker for ten years and passed out on the couch every night. One day he just stopped drinking and, two years later, allows himself to drink once or twice per month. Is it realistic to think that I could do this, or is it just to early to know?
Thanks for your input.
an irish beat cop flags down a driver for going thru a stop sign and requires the guy to get out and explain himself. "well i slowed down to almost a stop and it looked safe so i just went ahead." says the driver with a confident nod and a wink. So the copper looks him up and down and then starts rapping him lightly on head with his stick saying "So, now, do you want me to stop, or just slow down...? "
hahaha
to early to know? hell no. more like not to late to ask.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,575
I spent decades trying to moderate. It was unthinkable that I'd never have another drink. I feel that my life almost ended during the holidays last year. I tried to prove to myself - one more time - that I could have a "few" with the rest of the family. As others have said, for us there is no "few". The first night was lovely & fun. Second day I started out early in the evening, had about 15 before going to bed. Next day, off to the races - hungover and drinking before noon. Three week binge followed with 24/7 drinking, where I was plunged into a despair I'd never had before, praying I'd make it back out alive. Not saying you're as far gone as some of us, jwell, but you could be headed that way. Please be careful.
everything is already ok
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,793
Not me, I know I can't use again and its a long time now that the obession and compulsion to use was removed.
Grateful for that each and every day.
Kevin
Grateful for that each and every day.
Kevin
Last edited by nogard; 06-26-2008 at 09:16 PM.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 24
Originally Posted by jwell100
One day he just stopped drinking and, two years later, allows himself to drink once or twice per month. Is it realistic to think that I could do this, or is it just to early to know?
Thanks for your input.
Thanks for your input.
I know that's not for me, though. Please just try not to kill yourself or someone else finding out if it is for you.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Southern Oregon
Posts: 86
Originally Posted by buttercup1
This thread has been a wealth of information for me. It seems that all the people that have posted say they cannot ever drink again because 1 or 2 leads to 10 or 12 or that they cant stop at a few. This has really got me thinking about why I first came here to SR. I've only been here a couple weeks and have drank more than I have not drank, but my desire to quit was there. But I guess I am different in that I can stop at 1 or 2 so does that still make me an alcoholic? I don't know. Wondering if I belong here or should I go about my merry way and enjoy the few drinks each night and stop obsessing about whether I have a problem???
There were times when I have 2 or 3 and occasionally would have more (binge maybe once every couple months), but since coming here, I have not drank more than 3 drinks in a night and have not wanted more. Is that too much?? Health wise I think so, but am I an alcoholic because I "want" those 3 beers every night. I know that "normal" people dont' wonder if they have a problem with alcohol, but I've always been the type to over think, over-worry etc. everything. God I am so confused......
There were times when I have 2 or 3 and occasionally would have more (binge maybe once every couple months), but since coming here, I have not drank more than 3 drinks in a night and have not wanted more. Is that too much?? Health wise I think so, but am I an alcoholic because I "want" those 3 beers every night. I know that "normal" people dont' wonder if they have a problem with alcohol, but I've always been the type to over think, over-worry etc. everything. God I am so confused......
If we have to calculate drinks or pills...it's time to ask why.
Good luck to you. I'm so happy you found this site. Keep posting.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: CA
Posts: 357
The first time I got sober, I thought that the world was going to end. On my first sober date, I ended up crying miserably in the restaurant because everybody around me was drinking wine like "normal" people (some of them didn't even empty their glasses!). My date was pretty embarrassed-especially when we found out that the couple next to us picked up our check because they felt so bad for me.
I wanted desperately to be a "grown up" who could keep alcohol in the house. But, after awhile it stopped mattering so much. I was sober for 2 and a half years and managed to work through a lot of the baggage, resentment, etc. I had to constantly find ways to neutralize that thought in my head saying "never again will I be able to drink".
I have relapsed a few times; sometimes I could have a drink and walk away. But the pattern is too easy to fall back into. There have been times when I am strong enough to let it go after a brief "slip", and other times, like now, when I have been allowing it to ruin my life for 6 months. Then there are things I'd read and heard about in early recovery that I doubted and even scoffed at. Like the one about tolerance. Boy, did I eat my words on that one---I went from 2 beers a day to 9 in less than a week this last time!
After a short time of sobriety, my life was so much richer and fuller. Almost ten years later I know that when I succumb to alcohol, I am pretty much flushing all the joy and depth in my life down the drain.
I wanted desperately to be a "grown up" who could keep alcohol in the house. But, after awhile it stopped mattering so much. I was sober for 2 and a half years and managed to work through a lot of the baggage, resentment, etc. I had to constantly find ways to neutralize that thought in my head saying "never again will I be able to drink".
I have relapsed a few times; sometimes I could have a drink and walk away. But the pattern is too easy to fall back into. There have been times when I am strong enough to let it go after a brief "slip", and other times, like now, when I have been allowing it to ruin my life for 6 months. Then there are things I'd read and heard about in early recovery that I doubted and even scoffed at. Like the one about tolerance. Boy, did I eat my words on that one---I went from 2 beers a day to 9 in less than a week this last time!
After a short time of sobriety, my life was so much richer and fuller. Almost ten years later I know that when I succumb to alcohol, I am pretty much flushing all the joy and depth in my life down the drain.
God's Kid
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 1,820
Heard in meetings
Me and drinking alcohol, is like having sex with a gorilla...it only stops when the gorilla wants it to stop.
It's been great reading this thread and I wanted to add that if one is an AA member, like myself, most of us seem to live without the urge or obsession (what ever one wants to call it) to drink, so the idea that we can't 'ever drink again', isn't that important because alcohol is not important to me anymore. I would be more disturbed if i found out I could never eat apples again. As our Big book says, the problem has been removed.
And in recovery I've found things that gave me a natural high. Smiled till my cheeks ached. Laughed till I thought I would vomit and/or cry. Shared special moments with family and friends. Have been part of a community. Had one of my achivements recognised by another. The list goes on and on, and these are real, not chemically induced, plus I get to keep them and call them memories.
It's been great reading this thread and I wanted to add that if one is an AA member, like myself, most of us seem to live without the urge or obsession (what ever one wants to call it) to drink, so the idea that we can't 'ever drink again', isn't that important because alcohol is not important to me anymore. I would be more disturbed if i found out I could never eat apples again. As our Big book says, the problem has been removed.
And in recovery I've found things that gave me a natural high. Smiled till my cheeks ached. Laughed till I thought I would vomit and/or cry. Shared special moments with family and friends. Have been part of a community. Had one of my achivements recognised by another. The list goes on and on, and these are real, not chemically induced, plus I get to keep them and call them memories.
Abbie-Normal
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: SE Texas
Posts: 19
Hey Jwell,
I'm a new "Sobie" myself. I got down to the bottom of the jug on tuesday night (this week) and told the wifey I was done. She was buzzing real good and forgot what I said the next day! Anyhoo, we went to visit some friends we've not seen about 2 years to cook and visit. My wife stopped off and got our favorite beer. I didn't touch 'em! Didn't even look at 'em. All I kept thinking was "WHOA! she needs a TicTac!"
The point I'm trying to make is, I had it set in my mind to quit. As soon as I saw the beer I thought to myself, "Well, I can have a few tonite and quit tomorrow." NO! I had to obligate myself to my word. Okay, I'll shaddap now.
-Gringo
I'm a new "Sobie" myself. I got down to the bottom of the jug on tuesday night (this week) and told the wifey I was done. She was buzzing real good and forgot what I said the next day! Anyhoo, we went to visit some friends we've not seen about 2 years to cook and visit. My wife stopped off and got our favorite beer. I didn't touch 'em! Didn't even look at 'em. All I kept thinking was "WHOA! she needs a TicTac!"
The point I'm trying to make is, I had it set in my mind to quit. As soon as I saw the beer I thought to myself, "Well, I can have a few tonite and quit tomorrow." NO! I had to obligate myself to my word. Okay, I'll shaddap now.
-Gringo
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,784
Drink again? I don't dare. I've stopped and started up again too many times to count, but each time was the same old crap: drink too much, feel like hell, recover, and vow to stay sober. I don't dare ever touch it again as it's poison to me and never makes me feel good, just feel worse than ever.
If I take it one day at a time it's not so bad. But I know deep down I can never drink again.
If I take it one day at a time it's not so bad. But I know deep down I can never drink again.
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