Jomey

Hi everyone, it is 8 am here - I am leaving the house in a few minutes for the 8:15 Mass at my church, then I am going horseback riding, and then I am going to my second AA meeting. (Although my older son warned me to come home and change before I go because the meeting is in a church, and he said the priest probably won't like it if his church smells like a barn after the meeting!!!! GOTTA love the honesty of kids!)

Where would I have been a 23 days ago at this time....hmmm.......laying in bed, already exhausted just from getting up and getting the kids off to school, trying to convince my red, dry eyes to open, trying to convince my stomach that it could handle coffee, or at least ice water for my dry,scratchy throat, pounding headache, wondering how long I could lay there before it was absolutely imperative that I get up so I could get something, anything done during the day before the kids got home so I could look back when I started drinking that night and say...Well, I took care of the kids, I ironed, cleaned, dusted a room, did the wash, whatever, so drinking really is just a part of my lifestyle, it's not affecting me so much that I can't do what I need to do. I'm ok.

HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How could I have been so sick for so long and not know it? I am amazed by how much my life has changed in three weeks....I just had to share this as part of saying thank you to everyone who continues to support me here, and to say that if being sober can do this for me in three weeks, and I have stayed sober and am getting stronger in my sobriety every day, anyone can do it..and it doesn't take long to see the results.

Thanks everybody for listening....I'll post back about how the meeting goes (I have Mass & a ride to keep my mind off being nervous - hope it helps!)

Chynita- if you're reading, my prayers are going up for you this morning, especially, along with everyone else here.

Anna

Great post Jomey!

I'm glad things are going well for you.

parentrecovers

great, jomey! thanks for sharing, k

Tazman53

Thanks for the share Jomey, keep an eye out for a temporary sponsor.

Jomey

OK you guys! The "sobriety gods" played a trick on me!!! You know I am so nervous about going new places, well, this morning, I was feeling all on top of the world, sober, strong, etc. I didn't have time for Mass, horseback riding and a dry run to the other church where the meeting was, so I decided to be bold and skip the dry run. You probably already know what happened...DUH! Went to the wrong church!!! And sat there confidently in the parking lot thinking, "Oh, they probably moved the meeting, and I read in a post that if they do that, they usually send a member to the old meeting place in case anyone new comes". So twenty minutes later, nobody shows up and by the time I walk home and figure out where I went wrong, too late.

Well, I double and triple checked the schedule for tomorrow and I am going to try again! And I am going to go for a dry run for sure!

Hope everyone is having a great day!

Jersey Nonny

I don't care if they did "fire" St. Christopher, I would still ask for his help to get me where I need to go.

Are you aware there is a movement among Catholic alcoholics to have a drunkard named Matt Talbot canonized? He would, of course, be the patron saint of alcoholics. Lord knows we could use one.

Sorry you missed out on your meeting; but, as you say, there is another tomorrow, and you'll know to check the location from now on. Good luck!

Rowan

Jomey,

I just wanted to say that I admire your optimism and determination. A lot of people would go to that meeting, find it gone, and say 'oh well, I tried' - but you've redoubled your efforts to get the right location tomorrow - and you'll go far with such an attitude. Keep moving forward, you're doing great.
BTW I often do dry runs myself, no matter where it is I need to go - I'm very nervous about new places, too.

Keep coming back!

Rowan

Astro

Thanks for an inspiring post, Jomey!

Jomey

Hi Rowan - Thanks for the encouraging words! I feel like I might be benefitting from a bit of the "pink cloud" effect, and that is one of the many reasons I am so determined to get to a meeting. I want to know why I feel good (besides the obvious stuff - no drinking, excercise, better sleep, etc.) I don't want to be dependent on moods or "feelings" to stay sober. Does that make sense? The first couple of weeks I was sober I felt awful, then this great feeling drifted in, and I can't attribute it to anything specific besides time. I want to learn everything there is to learn from others about recovery, so I can keep mine going!

Jersey Nonny - I have read Matt Talbot's story....very, very inspiring...I pray to EVERYBODY - "fired" or not. ..St. Christopher, St. Jude, Mary, St. Timothy (patron of those with disorders of the abdominal organs - closest I could find to patron saint of livers and pancreases(sp?)...I go to the doc. in two weeks for check up, so don't know if anything is specifically wrong, but I am sure my body could use some prayer ), and St. Monica, patron of mothers, St. Joseph, protector of the anxious....I could go on and on. I have a rosary & the brown scapular around my rear view mirror! Still can't imagine how all that back-up let me drive to the wrong church!!!! I will pray for Matt Talbot's cause, too. That would be awesome to have a canonized patron!

Anyway, you bet your bottom dollar I will be at the correct church tomorrow morning! Thanks for reminding me about Matt Talbot...maybe I'll pin a cross on my sleeve today....

Jersey Nonny

I'm pleased that you're familiar with the story of Matt Talbot, Jomey. For 20 years I was fortunate to be able to attend two Matt Talbot retreats a year at the New Jersey shore. They were conducted by alcoholic priests for 50 recovering women in May and 150 women in November (which happened to be the month of my sobriety date).

As far as I know, these retreats are held in the northeast because they originated through a group of alcoholic men in Morristown, N.J. I don't know if they may have spread to the south or west; but, if you ever have an opportunity to attend one, please do.

Aysha

Thats funny you mention a rosery on your rear view mirror. I went to a church last week and they were giving away rosaries. I have never had one. And I wasnt there for any service..I was there for another reason. But I noticed them on the table as I was leaving and decided to look them over and I wasnt sure why they were there. I saw this beautiful blue one and was holding it and the lady said they were giving them away I could have one if I wanted. So I took that one and the firsat thing I did was hang it on my mirror in my truck. Because that truck is what takes me to the places that gets me in trouble and it is usually when I am driving when I get my urges.
When I first put it in the cross wouldnt stay turned front ways.
I couldnt get it to stay for nothing.
Funny...It has turned front ways over the past few days and has stayed that way.
Kinda corny but its true.
Great determination indeed.
You are my inspiration that I will get enough courage to go. But I am going to leave that alone until I actully get to one.
Proud of you!!!

GrouchoTheCat

You thought you were in the right place,
at the right time,
doing the right thing.

You head is in the right place!

AA works for me, and just enjoy the pink cloud. It's a wonderful place to be.

Jomey

Hi Jersey - I will look into those retreats...sounds awesome!

Chiy- Thanks for the kind words and sharing the story of your rosary...I also drive a truck...maybe we're soul sisters? and you are just a week or so behind me in getting to a meeting? You know I am way still fresh off the feelings of terror to try and push you, I just feel like I would love to share the good feelings I have right now with the world, esp. someone else who is suffering and nervous. Thanks again for the hugs -

Dee74

proud of you Jomey
keep up the great work !!


D

CarolD

RX for keeping the joy of recovery....
Help someone else each day.

Works great for me!

Keep moving forward ...

Tazman53

Jomey you are taking the actions, and when they do not quite work out you double your effort, AA you will find is a program of action and the biggest and most rewarding actions are working with others which you are already doing simply by sharing your ESH.

In regards to that pink cloud, some people view it as dangerous, but I have had more then one old timer tell me that if you stay solid in your program that you can ride that pink cloud for ever, just stay prepared in case it evaporates keep working your AA program and in time you will be able to hop right back on board!

barb dwyer

way to go, Jomey!!!

Jomey

Good morning everyone...starting Day 24...

Thanks for all the good wishes...not alot to say today except THANKS...it feels so good to just type "day 24"...(cry break! in a good way!)

Carol, thanks for the useful suggestion..When I have a little more time, I would like to share something with you about how deeply your short post hit home with me...I am running a little late this morning, so, unfortunately it will have to wait, but I won't forget...very important, THANK YOU!

Taz -Thanks for the words of wisdom about the pink cloud effect...I am a little afraid of it. I have a million miles to go (at least) on learning to turn things over fully to my HP. I ask His opinion a lot, but I don't always give it more weight than my own!!! So, I am glad that you view AA as a program of action, because I am not able to be passive in regard to my recovery at all right now.

I am headed to Mass at my church and then to a meeting...I know EXACTLY which church I am going to this time, I'm sure...it should be against the law for one denomination to have two churches so close together with similar names!

Thanks for all your support! Just being able to share means alot!

ps -Taz...sorry to be so dull, what does ESH mean? Thanks! J

Astro

Experience, strength, and hope.

Jomey

Hi everyone...I DID IT!!! 2 down....5 million (give or take )meetings to go...Don't have a lot of time now, but just wanted to say thanks for all the encouragment...The good news is that I got to the meeting and wasn't nearly as nervous....bad news is that this group seemed kinda gloomy...I am going to give it another shot with this group because the church is close to my house & I did feel a little more comfortable with women only...maybe just an off day? Or maybe I don't know exactly what to expect...but there was a lot of talk about all the awful things that happened to these women when they were drinking, but they were not following it up with positive stories of sobriety...that's would I would like to hear some more of...Anyway, it made feel good that I went and I feel positive that I will find "my people" sooner or later...esp. if I make it to the right place on the first try! :P