junem

I belong to a very intese addiction recovery support group of people in my profession. I recently had a one evening relapsw and drank. I took it to group. Usually when there is relapse in this group the entire 2 hours is devouted to it. It took alot of courage for me to let them know about my relapse in check in and I asked for some time. The entire group anfd facilitator danced all around the issue of my relapse and avoided it. I should also mention that I am bipolar and am currently hypomanic. They may have elected not to address my lapse because of my current mental state. However the entire thing ended up to be very trauma triggering and I I have had vivid flashbacks since. I think the looking the other way was a little to like the way everyone looked the other way when I was a kid because what was happening to me was too ugly to face. Should I let the group know that by treating me differently and not letting me addrss my problem caused me distress in the form of trauma re-experience. I get so sick of having to address my mental illnesses in this group as the rest of them struggle with addiction only and I don't know what is appropriate for me to talk about there. However mental illness plays a major role in my battle with addiction. What do you think?

Morning Glory

I think I would speak to the group leader privately and ask your questions. I know how hard it is to feel different from everyone else in a group. Bringing this all out in front of the entire group might trigger that feeling again.

They also have dual recovery groups. You might try looking into that. It's really important to me to feel accepted when I'm working through things. That awful feeling of rejection works against me.

Hugs

junem

Thanks for your input Morning Glory. It seems a shame that a support group ends up causing distress.

Morning Glory

It is a shame, but what works for some doesn't work for others. That's why it's ok to move on and find what is helpful for us. I've walked out on many things that I knew would not help me. I also know that sometimes my perception is off because of triggers from my past. It's important for you to find out what happened and do a reality test.

I wouldn't make any sudden changes, but it wouldn't hurt to explore other options.

Hugs

Don W

I agree with Morning Glory. I understand how difficult it must be. There are different groups with different adjendas. Talk to the leader. Might be it is as simple as this isn't the right group for you. This happens, many times if there are Old Time AA members. Not to fault them but, many have never accepted dual addictions in AA. When I came around first in the 80's, people with drug addictions were driven away. Even, court ordered people had problems. Then they would say things like, " it doesn't matter what got you here." I was set upon for signing a court slip. I suggest you find another group. Sounds to me that it might be a breeding ground for resentments or both sides. Another idea, would be to find other people with the same issues and form a group. There might not be other groups in your area, so this might help. The key is don't get angry and use this for an excuse to drink. I did, many times. I'd get mad at someone in one group and decide not to go to AA at all. Then, to show them, I'd drink. Then justify it, " You see what they did? They made me drink. This happens in every group, not just recovery groups. I belong to a group called the ODD Fellows, I know, I know a perfect group for me, my wife and family says. Anyway, they fight about the same things I've seen Church and recovery groups fight over. Then either quit, or the better idea is to try other groups. Just remember, while searching don't stop meetings. Don W