4health

I have to quit drinking. I have progressivly gotten worse about my drinking. It seems to have snuck up on me, or maybe that is just what I tell myself. It has been 3.5 days without it. I have quit smoking and feel I will be able to quit drinking as well.

I have kids, a husband, am involved in the community. I have to quit for my health both physical and mental health. My mental health is deteriorating due to my drinking. I feel so much guilt and shame. I want to join your group so you and I can help each other through these times.

I feel like I can't talk to anyone around me about how I really feel or what I am going through. I live in a small town and everyone just knows everyone's business.

Another thing, my husband drinks too. He's not willing to quit yet. So I am doing this without his help really.

I know I can't be the only one in the same kind of situation.

amymarie

Hi 4health- Glad you are here. Don't be afraid to say what you need to while here at SR. Everyone has been extremely helpful to me, and I am sure you will find the same thing.
Do not let your husband's drinking deter you from what YOU have to do for YOURSELF. Much luck to you.
amy

livenletlive

4health, thanks for sharing and welcome to SR. This community is great and we all do our best to carry the message and help each other. I am glad you are quitting drinking for you and not anyone else, that is the way it works. I wish you the best of luck and look around to find some great info on our affliction.

CarolD

Glad to see you here.....

Small towns are like that.....just think how proud the others will be to see you sober!

And yes....they did notice your drinking.

Blessings...

4health

hehe, I guess it IS a little naive to think 'they all' thought all that booze was for my husband huh? In talking with my mom, a recovered alcoholic, she said I was pretty classic.

fraankie

congrats on 3days
go to AA
give it a shot
best
frraankie

hopealwayz

I am so glad that you are here. You are definitely not alone in this battle. Congrats on 3 days of being sober. You are getting a taste of a wonderful life that can be yours if you work for it. We are all in this together and just reach your hand out here to us and we will pull you aboard. Welcome to the group of winners!

Don W

Hi 4health, Welcome. You've come to the right place. And you've taken that first step.
I would suggest seeing your doctor. First he can help with advice. Most important he can check for any physical damage. Many cases a simple blood test will reveal problems with liver etc, and alcohol can be one of the most dangerous things to withdrawer from. Chances are everything is fine but, catching a problem early is important. The support group is a good idea. We can sometimes do it alone but, you don't have to. Get connected here and some group. You can shop later for a better fit.
Your mind is going to be a little? off during this withdrawal. This is normal. The further you go without drinking the more this will be reduced. Don W

Sadie12

It is hard to quit when husband's don't do it at the same time. Alot of temptations but it Is totally you quitting for you and you can't wait for him to quit, it may never happen. Women definately get affected in so many more ways from alcohol than men do.. personality changes, health problems..etc.

Your husband drinking still will make it more challenging than you probably wish it would be (me being in the same boat) but we're not gonna divorce the people we love because we're having a hard time quitting and letting ourselves be persuaded into having a few with our husbands.

I think after the beginning of sobriety it won't be a temptation to drink with your husband after a while, anyways.

I get resentful when mine drinks and it has been hard for me in the past...but then i think if i were alone, it would be even harder for me to stop.

Drinking for 22 yrs (not everyday but too much when i did) it has become just plain ol' hard to just stop anymore.

I believe that if the problem drinker doesn't stop soon enough it will be twice as hard to stop 10 more years down the drinking road....or "partying" road..whatever you choose to call it.

I feel like I don't wanna do this back n forth, thinking about drinking or not drinking for another ten yrs. I can't take it. I want it gone and am working on it.

Congrats on your 3 days.
SM

doorknob

Oh, men experience those changes and problems too! I can testify to both. Although I understand there is evidence that on average women progress faster toward physical dependence than do men. Keep up the good work 4health. Day 5?

DK

4health

Yes, today is day 5! I am feeling good about quitting but am feeling quite emotional today.

My reason for being here is that I blacked out. I hurt my sisters feelings, I was the sole care taker of my kids that night. It was highly dangerous even if nothing 'bad' happened. It was 'bad' enough that I got like that!!! I need to just tell myself I screwed up. I am on the road to recovery here, and I guess I need to forgive myself. My sister won't talk to me. Kids seem fine. I feel like crap for putting them through this.


But I am getting better. I feel it. My husband doesn't know I am here. I am doing this on my own pretty much. My best friend and my (step) mom are my sole supporters other than you guys here and you're helping more than you know.

We'll get through this.
Day 5

How are you doing? I guess I'll read around and see if you posted anything on you. I hope your hanging in there! Oh and I think what you said is true. It did seem faster for me than my husband to have such problems. As a matter of fact, I seem to be worse period. HE doesn't have the same issues I do.

livenletlive

Don't beat yourself up over the past situation. You are making a change today. Just for today.

michaelj

First of all I would like to say welcome to this community, you have come to a great place for support an information. I would echo Livenletlive's words and urge you not to beat yourself up about the past, it's a foreign country about which you can do nothing. I have learned to accept my past mistakes and use them to ensure my continued sobriety.
My wife offered not to drink in my company when I first gave up, I did not want her to do that as I felt she would suffer for my alcoholism. She drinks "normally", perhaps two or three glasses of wine a week and whilst at first it felt awkward when she drank and I didn't I quickly became accustomed to it.
You will become accustomed to your husband drinking, just give it time.
I hope you can patch things up with your sister, it is important right now for you to have as few distractions from your continuing sobriety as possible.
Good luck and best wishes, if there is one piece of information that I could get across to you it is that things get easier and life gets better.
Michael

4health

That is my plan today. I want to quit thinking about what got me here and just heal today. I am feeling good about my quitting and I want to continue that.

Thank you guys for your encouragement. You are making a difference for me

HUGS!