Andygirl

I smell a troll.

bat

Tell her you'll quit and then quit. And do everything in your power to quit,
And if you don't want to quit tell her so, and let her go,

minnie

bat, hon, this is an old thread. Frustrated Donny has graced us with his prescence recently - http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...zed-76618.html

If only he'd taken your advice....

youngirish

i feel so sorry for your wife....
you should print your posts and have someone else read them to you out loud....

fraankie

tell her"i'm going to AA
you can come if you like"
the go to AA

Peter

Nothing........perhaps you have already said enough.Perhaps it is time for you to stop talking and take action.....action says a lot more than words...

Stop drinking.....
Stop pissing on the rug.....
Stop having sex with prostitutes....
Go back to AA meetings.........

Pick-a-name

That's the conditions for this wife, BTW.

Pick-a-name

Sounds like the alcohol talking to me.....sometimes hard to pin down the facts..... Just easier to see when you are not drinking.

FrustratedDonny

Alright, I said I was done in this area of the board, but I'm not going to be called a liar. I won't bother to reply to the other holier-than-thou sort that "smell a troll." As far as this goes - my wife was out of work until September, when she got the job she was waiting for. She gets paid a set salary and also works on commission from her client's portfolios and is well on course to make 100K in her first year of employment - probably over that. She was out of work and didn't bother to get 'A' job for months while I shouldered the entire financial burden because she didn't want to get a job she wasn't trained (went to college) for.

That's the story for the record, "Buddy." Got anything else to say?
Don't bother asking specifics, cause I value the marriage we had at least not to mention exactly where she works to a big mouth like you.

Dan

Oh sure you did.
That's why you spent so much time with the girls in the back room of the strip club... 'cause you valued your wife.
Priceless.

FrustratedDonny

See, this is what I'm talking about - nothing but insults and judgement.
Yeah, I did wrong along the way - crucify me.

I'm done with this forum altogether. I do apologize if I stepped on toes, but I don't need sarcasm, insults and negative judgement right now.

Moderator - feel free to close the thread if you wish. Thanks for allowing me to vent when I had no one else to turn to...even if it did offend everyone else here.

Autumn

Yeah, you valued your marriage sooooo much, you just had to run your flappin' jaws (BIG MOUTH) off to your buddy (and mention exactly where she was staying), who consequently slashed her tires.



You know what, dude? I MIGHT have had some empathy for you had you expressed one BIT of remorse for the way you treated your wife. You are totally without conscience, alcoholic or not. Not every alcoholic does things they feel no regret for, and *the disease* is no excuse.

You should still go to jail.

Autumn

Yes, and we have a fine banner just for such an occasion:

:*******:

and it doesn't work.

(((Stormy))), you don't owe him an explanation. And don't feel bad about him calling you a big mouth either. I have an armchair diagnosis for people like him, and it ain't just *alcoholic*.

Autumn

Armchair diagnosis and the fact that you should be in jail aside, why do you think you were wrong? Because she's gone now, and you have no *whipping boy*? Or because you love her?

What did you expect? You came back expressing anger for your wife leaving, while seeking validation for your negative actions and further intentions.

Why? Are you ashamed? Don't run away just yet.

Regardless of whether or not anyone was offended, this is about YOUR life. Yeah, a lot of people were mad, but they gave honest opinions. I see a person who needs some serious help, and I hope you find it. Because IMO, your actions aren't those of someone who is just an alcoholic.

Something inside you came back to read, even after the first round.

I don't know exactly what you need. Maybe your wife leaving and the responses you read here are a start. Your friend is obviously useless. Some people's lives have turn this bad to begin some kind of change. At the end of the day, all you have is YOU. You're very, very lucky you still have that. Take positive action before something really bad happens - before choices are taken away from you. You're on a dangerous path to self-destruction, with regard to your health, freedom and life.

As a fellow human being who has known real suffering, I truly hope that you are not beyond reach.

That's all I can suggest. Peace.

Dan

You're doing a fine job doing that yourself, Donny.

You say you're looking for support and encouragement. You take action, and I'll be the first one off the blocks to cheer you on.
And by action, I mean owning the consequences of your behavior.
I wish I could look in your eyes, man. It would be so much easier to see where you're coming from...

You posted that 02-21-05.
So, where you at on that file, Donny?

Five

Donny - are you for real?

If you are then maybe its time to chuck in the towel on the drinking front? Even you must get tired of how angsty, and off kilter you have become.

If you want to get sober, and get this whole mess cleared up then I and many others are here to help you and get you advice.

Be objective - see that something is wrong here - and take action, as Dan rightly says.

Also, if your feeling terrified, then we all have felt that - and overcome it as well.

Five.

fraankie

yeah, donny
i know how you feel

it's basically human nature

i got 10 years now
and things were going really good 5 years ago
family, girlfriend, job, a future
boy, did the whole world love me
now, whatever happened (it doesn't matter)
no one wants to it
a friend up the corner just told me to pray
family now insults me, disrespects me
etc

i gather it's basically
"laugh and the world laughs with you
cry and cry alone
so
do your best


best
fraankie

Peter

I personally am in no position to judge you, Donny, but with your own fingers you posted about your self destructive behaviour and levelled some very harsh criticism on your wife.Please note that if you come to a public forum and divulge your faults people are gonna call you on it......

Cindi R

I could have been that wife...
{minus the puking on the carpet, pissing on the floor and flattening the tires}
My addict was so consumed with his drug use that he ignored all the signs that it was over.
I gladly paid for the divorce and most of the bills...
Today I have peace & serenity in my life.
He has a new wife. As far as I know he's still drinking & drugging...
He's been gone for almost 3 years now.
I prayed for my ex...to have all the things I wanted for myself...
Sobriety, a healthy relationship, a good relationship with our children...
I'm not sure that it's helped him to acchieve these things...
but I know for a fact that it's helped me!

Kaitlyn2007

I know it's hard, but your wife loves you so much and only wants the best fro you.
She's not trying and believe me the last thing in the world she wants to so is give you an ultimatum, but she is desperately trying to get you to wake up.

Perhaps those people at AA were jerks. What about a local church? You could get counseling and it's free? Or private counseling, or for all else........check yourself into rehab., It will be hthe hardest thing ever, but I guarentee your wife would stand by your side.

Try not looking at her like your mom or the "naggin" wife. Try to see she is begging, hoping for your marriage to really make it. If she didn't love you she would have been gona long before now. She wants to be your friend and help you through this and out of this. You can overcome, It will not be easy but maybe you just need to look at some other options. It's great your are seeking advice here!
Good Luck and try to realize your wife is just wanting and trying to be your friend b/c you are her life!

Good luck and God Bless! You can do this!