one HOUR at a time!
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one HOUR at a time!
I just got out of detox/rehab yesterday...hence only four days sober and Im sure that everyone is going through what I am right now. Im scared, angry, alone and especially co-dependent on my boyfriend whom just this afternoon informed me that he isnt quite sure that getting back together is what he really wants. He talked me through detox and even saw me yesterday and evening but I could tell something wasn't right. After some investigating, I now know. We have had our problems, mostly because of my drinking, but I got the impression from him and his friends that he was shook to the core by this and really wants to help. I feel hopelessly lost and sad again. I really need some encouraging advice...help if you can relate.
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Kansas City, KS USA
Posts: 27
Hi!
Welcome to early recovery. First of all, are you going to meetings? Your focus right now needs to be you and your sobriety, that's #1, before all else. Concentrate on being the best you that you can be, a sober you. As hard as it is, try not to think about your BF or obsess over him right now. Shift the focus to you. You can't make someone love you, all you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to him to realize your worth. This is a very hard time when your emotions will be running high. Once we take away alcohol and/or , our brains have to adjust and that's not always a pleasant thing to go through. Meetings are so important, as is finding a sponsor, someone with a good sobriety who will be there for you. When I first got sober, my husband and I had tons of issues to work through! I was worried that we wouldn't make it. But once I started concentrating on me and my sobriety, working the steps and straightening my life out, things improved dramatically. Now we have a good marriage again. It's not always easy, but it is so worth it! If your BF needs time apart, give it to him and use it to improve yourself. He may just come around again when he sees the change in you. Remember, you can't control or change anyone except yourself. Best of luck to you and hang in there, it does get easier!
Cat
Welcome to early recovery. First of all, are you going to meetings? Your focus right now needs to be you and your sobriety, that's #1, before all else. Concentrate on being the best you that you can be, a sober you. As hard as it is, try not to think about your BF or obsess over him right now. Shift the focus to you. You can't make someone love you, all you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to him to realize your worth. This is a very hard time when your emotions will be running high. Once we take away alcohol and/or , our brains have to adjust and that's not always a pleasant thing to go through. Meetings are so important, as is finding a sponsor, someone with a good sobriety who will be there for you. When I first got sober, my husband and I had tons of issues to work through! I was worried that we wouldn't make it. But once I started concentrating on me and my sobriety, working the steps and straightening my life out, things improved dramatically. Now we have a good marriage again. It's not always easy, but it is so worth it! If your BF needs time apart, give it to him and use it to improve yourself. He may just come around again when he sees the change in you. Remember, you can't control or change anyone except yourself. Best of luck to you and hang in there, it does get easier!
Cat
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