Becoming myself again
Michael
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: London England
Posts: 291
Becoming myself again
I have been sober now for twelve weeks following many years of alcoholism. Slowly but surely over those years of increasing dependance my character changed. Where I had been light hearted I became morose. Where I had been full of conversation and quick witted I became withdrawn and unwilling to converse. Possibly the worst change was from being loving and generous to being withdrawn mean and lonely. When I was aware of these changes I put them down to ageing or to the passage of time and the inevitable sameness of being in a 35 year marriage.
Now that I am sober my life is altered so much it defies belief. I am so much happier within myself, and my relationship with my wife is better now than it has been for years. These personal emotional benefits are perhaps the greatest gifts of sobriety. If I had been asked four months ago "was I happy" I would most definitely have answered no. In alcohol life had no meaning and although I have never been suicidal I thought that death would be a release from the treadmill I was on.
Now every new day is one of opportunity and something to be used and enjoyed. When drinking, days were simply periods of time to be organised around getting hold of the next glass. I hope there are many of you out there who feel the same and perhaps others who are weighing up the pros and cons of sobriety who might be swayed by my experience. You could give up the booze and like me , get your old self back.
Michael
Now that I am sober my life is altered so much it defies belief. I am so much happier within myself, and my relationship with my wife is better now than it has been for years. These personal emotional benefits are perhaps the greatest gifts of sobriety. If I had been asked four months ago "was I happy" I would most definitely have answered no. In alcohol life had no meaning and although I have never been suicidal I thought that death would be a release from the treadmill I was on.
Now every new day is one of opportunity and something to be used and enjoyed. When drinking, days were simply periods of time to be organised around getting hold of the next glass. I hope there are many of you out there who feel the same and perhaps others who are weighing up the pros and cons of sobriety who might be swayed by my experience. You could give up the booze and like me , get your old self back.
Michael
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,709
I still shake my head in disbelief sometimes, when I reflect on just how a typical day for me was centered around alcohol. Purchasing it, drinking it, sometimes hiding it.
Add to that the mental and physical efforts required to try and meet deadlines and responsibilities while being violently hungover most days.
What a tragic waste of life.
Great post Michael.
Add to that the mental and physical efforts required to try and meet deadlines and responsibilities while being violently hungover most days.
What a tragic waste of life.
Great post Michael.
The joy of my life in recovery is awesome!
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