BullDog777

Sup.
I haven't done this in awhile. Posting an update or even checking in lately has been something I've been avoiding because of my lack of news. Same s#It, different day. I'm doing ok, all things considered. Kids are still at home, wife is still at home, Dad is still at home, I'm still at home. I've only been to the store a handful of times. I think I'm getting mildly stir crazy.

I have no desire to drink, but I haven't been very motivated to do much either. What do you do when you're stuck at the end of a plague with another 6-7 months before I can get everyone vaccinated?

Coming up on 5 years...yay. LOL I dunno what to say. I'm just tired of 2020 and all the BS it brought. I'm ready to move the F on. Hopefully selling my last property by the end of the month. After that, vacation time...not. Nowhere safe to go. Bah.

I don't mean to sound ungrateful. I have it better than most. I'm just bored and exhausted all at the same time. It doesn't help that I'm having really bizarre dreams lately either. Like really weird stuff. So...no more caffeine for awhile. I think that'll help.

I hope everyone is doing well. Sorry I don't have more exciting or motivating news or stuff going on. It's just a planet of BLAH right now.

Dee74

I think this year has been really tough for almost everyone J - depression and amotivation is affecting a lot of folks.
Try and stay as connected and purposeful as you can - and hope next year is better man.

Briansy

Good to hear from you Bulldog. Encouraging to hear someone in a very "blah" frame of mind but still with no desire to drink.

Pfizer vaccine was approved today in the UK with 800,000 jabs ready to go next week. I think the end of the tunnel is closer than people are saying. Certainly for those of us in affluent first world countries which is most of us here...

Lpg

Hey bulldog
Congrats on nearly 5 years that's amazing.

I hear ya on the motivation front this year has been a stinker, hoping for better things in 2021 I started off lockdown in panic, then got motivated and turned my attention to home improvements like many people I imagine. The last few weeks I've been living in my pyjamas and feeling exhausted also. No desire to drink here either, I think that's a massive achievement in itself.

Here's to (hopefully) a brighter 2021, spring feels promising.

nez

Congrats on the upcoming 5 years! That is awesome.

Blah is way better than the ______ (fill n the blank) of drinking. For me, the silver lining to 2020 is that it has reinforced the thought that I have more strength than I give myself credit for and fairly rock solid recovery. So I am grateful for the reminder of that 2020 continually gives me.

It is easy for me to forget that thought and I am always the last to know and acknowledge it; but at this point, I do have to admit that I could do with a little less reminding!

MelindaFlowers

Hey Bulldog,

I can relate. I've been sober for six years but this pandemic has been trying for my mental health. Congratulations on getting through sober. What a time. I can imagine many are struggling.

Grungehead

I feel ya BD. I just made a post for the first time in months. I check in once or twice a week and read a few threads, but I find I either don't have anything to say or can't find the right words and end up not posting what I wrote. I also think I may have gotten Covid because I was sick for about 2 months from mid September to mid November, but I wasn't severely ill (except for maybe a 2-3 day period kind of in the middle of that time where I considered going to the ER on more than one occasion). Then all symptoms resolved almost as fast as they came on. And they happened to come on about 4 days after I made my monthly trip to Walmart for groceries and supplies on September 15th.

I just saw my doctor on Friday and he said my lungs sounded great. I had developed adult onset asthma about a year ago, and at the height of whatever I had it was getting really bad (the reason I considered going to the ER). Strangely, when the symptoms resolved so did my asthma. I haven't had to use either of my inhalers (Symbicort and Albuterol) in nearly 3 weeks, and that's the first time that's happened in over a year.

Anyway, good to hear everyone in the BD household is doing OK and hanging in there.

BullDog777

Hi Everyone,

It's been a crazy 3 weeks. My dad isn't doing too well right now with my mom being gone and all he seems to like to do is sit around playing sad Christmas music. I know he's still very much grieving, but then we got some more crappy news. My brother and both his boys got covid and his youngest has asthma. He's not doing very well right now. Trying to stay updated with their condition and helping my dad stay out of the dumps is kinda exhausting. I've had my home in lockdown for almost a month. No store...no shopping, nothing. I get everything done on my phone. Everyone is still healthy, but I'm goin nuts. Everyone is goin nuts. Just more of the same ol same ol. I can't imagine doing any of this if i were still drinking.
The economy tanking has hit my extended family hard so I'm helping them now too. What they're getting to stay a float right now wouldn't feed a family in 1988 let alone 2020. I drove down the street my dad was raised on in Baltimore the other day and i see dozens and dozens of cars with people living in them. Homeless communities are everywhere. Homes are empty, it's sad.
I count my blessings everyday. I have a roof over my head, I'm not food or financially insecure and I can take care of my family. An then I whine about being bored and frustrated? I have no problems of any substance. I don't crave booze or drugs anymore. My life is good.
I hope everyone is healthy.

Delilah1

Hi Bulldog,

I am sorry to read about your brother and his family, I hope they recover quickly, I am sure you and your dad are very worried. It is great that you are checking in with your dad knowing he is lonely, this time of year is hard enough normally, throw loss and Covid in and it is even harder.

I am also getting close to the five year mark, January 1st will be my milestone, so regardless of anything else 2021 will start off with a big reason to be thankful for me. Gratitude has been one of the most crucial parts of my recovery, and just overall outlook on life. 2020 has definitely been challenging, and there have been days when I’ve been down, but I always go back to what I have to be grateful for, and it sounds like you do the same.

I hope you enjoy the holidays with your family, I will keep your brother and his family, especially his son in my thoughts.

❤️Delilah

Dee74

Inspite of all the difficulties i wish you and your family a Happy Holidays BD

D

entropy1964

It has been a very weird year. An Un year. Like some kind of twilight zone....I do think there is light at the end of the tunnel but it's distant. I'm guessing there will be lots of kerfuffle's with the vaccine process so we can expect ongoing crazy. And the poor US? Well, nuff said. A swarming hive of Sapiens. I'm reading this book called Human Kind....its a more gentle and positive view of Sapiens. It was written pre-pandemic. I wonder how this would have impacted his sunny viewpoint. Traditionally humans band together over shared trauma....hmmmm. Of course the news would have us all eating each other's children so how much can really be trusted? Ugh. Anyway.....

I feel like I've just been 'observing' the pandemic. Not all that personally impacted except for feeling heart broken for those that are. My parents, my child, and just humanity as a whole. While my life goes on pretty much the same. I've been training for isolation. I am now 'all the rage' the lone wolf. But I can understand how hard this is for more adjusted people than I.

Hang in there. Better times are coming. 2024 will be like the roaring 20's of last century!!