Covid 19
Member
Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 137
Originally Posted by fini 
hi Funki,
i never said there was anything wrong with attempts at moderating. in fact, i made many. as i mentioned in my post. it was the repeated failed moderation attempts that finally made me see, admit, understand, accept, that abstinence was the way to go.
the phrase JS used made it sound, by juxtaposition, that abstinence is not an achievable goal.Â
i know when i felt like that it was because i thought it was not achievable for ME, simply because i had tried that, too, and couldn’t stick to it. nor stick to moderating. often, i just gave up trying. at those times, continued failure was too much to bear.
ultimately, continued drinking was too much to bear. i have found abstinence to not only be achievable and desirable but so much easier than all those constant attempts at control.
i agree with you in one sense, though, if i understand you right: i think we need to know deep down for ourselves that moderation is impossible for us. and yeah, that may require a lot of “experiments” before we are convinced.
i never said there was anything wrong with attempts at moderating. in fact, i made many. as i mentioned in my post. it was the repeated failed moderation attempts that finally made me see, admit, understand, accept, that abstinence was the way to go.
the phrase JS used made it sound, by juxtaposition, that abstinence is not an achievable goal.Â
i know when i felt like that it was because i thought it was not achievable for ME, simply because i had tried that, too, and couldn’t stick to it. nor stick to moderating. often, i just gave up trying. at those times, continued failure was too much to bear.
ultimately, continued drinking was too much to bear. i have found abstinence to not only be achievable and desirable but so much easier than all those constant attempts at control.
i agree with you in one sense, though, if i understand you right: i think we need to know deep down for ourselves that moderation is impossible for us. and yeah, that may require a lot of “experiments” before we are convinced.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 137
Originally Posted by Dee74
Thanks Funki - I didn't intend for this to become a thing 
I'm getting uncomfortable flashbacks to when I was a new guy here and an old timer took me to task, lol..
I understand wanting to be fair and objective and wanting to set out all the options to try and help someone else.
I know this probably makes me sound like a cranky old man but I find it easier these days just to share my experience
Together I think the community - you me everyone - ends up giving pretty good advice.
D
I'm getting uncomfortable flashbacks to when I was a new guy here and an old timer took me to task, lol..
I understand wanting to be fair and objective and wanting to set out all the options to try and help someone else.
I know this probably makes me sound like a cranky old man but I find it easier these days just to share my experience
Together I think the community - you me everyone - ends up giving pretty good advice.
D
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
how are you doing, JS?
as far as getting out of ruts...when it's a vehicle, usually/often little back and forth motions with putting some supports under the wheel is the way to go, as opposed to one big huge full-throttle blast.
may be something to consider: drop the booze and make a list of tasks, simple tasks broken down into small increments, and start doing them.
and checking out online meetings could be one of those things.
as far as getting out of ruts...when it's a vehicle, usually/often little back and forth motions with putting some supports under the wheel is the way to go, as opposed to one big huge full-throttle blast.
may be something to consider: drop the booze and make a list of tasks, simple tasks broken down into small increments, and start doing them.
and checking out online meetings could be one of those things.
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