Rockbottom1964

On days 63 and 64 I was lusting for a drink… And night 62 and 63, I actually had insomnia for the first time in weeks, laying awake for a couple of hours at a time in the early hours. When I did sleep, it was fitfully and not nearly as deep as in the last month or so… The dreams, also, are back, although not half as bad as they were countless times before – during previous sober attempts. Now they’re just dreams – mostly about things I’m sorry for and think about a lot; before now, they were nightmares – bad and almost every night for weeks.
Another thing – my liver also hurt worse again for a few hours; a lot worse than it’s had in weeks, almost as bad as it used to when I drank. I woke up with a half sort-of hangover and was sluggish and fuzzy for most of the day…
It might just be the sugar, I suppose: I’ve been drinking 2 Lt of Coke a day for weeks now, starting about a month after I became sober. Also eating a lot of carbs, which again, translates into sugar. Or maybe it’s just another trick my sub-conscious mind is using to have me drink again.
If it is the sugar, we’ll soon see; I’m leaving the Coke and cutting the carbs on Monday coming. If it is just another devious way of the mind, well, I hope that as well, will fix itself in time.

65 days sober and going into yet another weekend of isolating myself from a bunch of sottish family members.....

doggonecarl

That's a lot of soda. Cutting back would be wise.

theVman31

65 days is good going.
Thats a lot of pop and with the carbs aint probably helping the sleep patterns...
Isolating yourself from toxic people isnt a bad thing neither.
Keep going and posting your progress here
Take care

Hawkeye13

RB, is there a chance you could visit or move elsewhere from the family compound, at least for awhile, until sobriety is more your “new norm”?

Being on a kind o lock down to avoid the drinking in the household isn’t helping your recovery. What are some other options you can start thinking about?

RecklessDrunk

Sometimes when I wake up in the middle of the night and am too awake to sleep and too tired to get up, I focus on my breathing.

Until my heart is content, about 5 or 10 minutes i guess, I breath as slow and deep as I can. I breath in slowly and and deliberately, probably about 10 seconds. Then I let it out even more slowly, as slowly as I can WITHOUT struggling. I'm a decent runner for a middle aged guy so this exhale can easily go many seconds. This, at least my intention, slows down my heart rate and brain. It's worked many times for me turning a 3 or 4 hour sleep into a 6 and a half or 7.

Also I get plenty of exercise and 6 days per week my diet is extremely low carb with intermittent fasting 16 to 24 hours at a time. Almost no sugar. I try and consume just enough caffeine so that I'm not hungry. One day per week I pig out, I think it would be a sin to not eat some of the pizza, burgers, and ice cream the good Lord has put on earth.

Rockbottom1964

Hi, Hawk. Nowhere else to go, I'm afraid. Nowhere I can take my two dogs to with me, that is. I'll just have to stick it out, but it is getting easier the longer I'm sober, I have to admit.

Rockbottom1964

Hi, RD. It all sounds like good advice and I'll definitely try it - especially the breathing and more exercise.