I did it again :-(
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Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 514
I did it again :-(
Hi everyone. It's been a while since I've come on this fantastic site, and I'll call myself out -
I've been slacking on my recovery work and flew off the rails. I am the absolute cliche of cliches when it comes to drinking; one is NEVER one. One is a bottle is two bottles is waking up having no idea what day it is and frantically looking through my phone, praying I didn't text my boyfriend something stupid, because I've really run out of chances with him (and I wouldn't blame him one bit if he ended things with me despite having been sober for almost 4 months). The last time I drank, let me tell you how stupid I was...
I was all set to visit a friend in NYC. I got to NYC and decided to drink in Penn Station... so stupid, as I've made this mistake before and have almost lost my life as a result. Well I did it anyway. Ended up on a train to NJ, had no idea where the heck I was when I had that "waking up" moment when I halfway emerge from my stupor... end up charging my phone at this weird popup store. My friend is frantic. I text my boyfriend and he is justifiably furious because I couldn't tell him where I was, just that I needed a ride or I was going to be sleeping with homeless people under a bridge. He manages to find me and takes me back to his place, where he is infuriated but still nurses my dumb a$$ back to health as he'd seen me in full-blown withdrawal before and it scared the heck out of him. After this episode, I was DONE with drinking. Or so I thought.
Moral of the story... do not let yourself get lax with your recovery plan. This disease requires constant action, constant vigilance, a lifestyle that actively incorporates sobriety into your daily activities. This most recent episode was literally just me and a big ol' bottle of vodka, falling off my bike (which I pride myself on, as it's been a big part of my fitness model).
I will NOT drink today, I will be strong but admit when I feel weak or tempted, reach out for help from the fantastic community of AA, and I wish the same for everyone here!!!!
Thank you to anyone who read all that <3
I've been slacking on my recovery work and flew off the rails. I am the absolute cliche of cliches when it comes to drinking; one is NEVER one. One is a bottle is two bottles is waking up having no idea what day it is and frantically looking through my phone, praying I didn't text my boyfriend something stupid, because I've really run out of chances with him (and I wouldn't blame him one bit if he ended things with me despite having been sober for almost 4 months). The last time I drank, let me tell you how stupid I was...
I was all set to visit a friend in NYC. I got to NYC and decided to drink in Penn Station... so stupid, as I've made this mistake before and have almost lost my life as a result. Well I did it anyway. Ended up on a train to NJ, had no idea where the heck I was when I had that "waking up" moment when I halfway emerge from my stupor... end up charging my phone at this weird popup store. My friend is frantic. I text my boyfriend and he is justifiably furious because I couldn't tell him where I was, just that I needed a ride or I was going to be sleeping with homeless people under a bridge. He manages to find me and takes me back to his place, where he is infuriated but still nurses my dumb a$$ back to health as he'd seen me in full-blown withdrawal before and it scared the heck out of him. After this episode, I was DONE with drinking. Or so I thought.
Moral of the story... do not let yourself get lax with your recovery plan. This disease requires constant action, constant vigilance, a lifestyle that actively incorporates sobriety into your daily activities. This most recent episode was literally just me and a big ol' bottle of vodka, falling off my bike (which I pride myself on, as it's been a big part of my fitness model).
I will NOT drink today, I will be strong but admit when I feel weak or tempted, reach out for help from the fantastic community of AA, and I wish the same for everyone here!!!!
Thank you to anyone who read all that <3
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