daredevil

Even though I haven’t drank for several months, I’ve developed a bit of an avoidant personality over the years (the longer and more I drank, the more avoidant I became), and while I still have the mojo to take care of the things that need to be taken care of, at times, I find myself avoiding new activities and growth opportunities. Maybe I’m not working recovery to the extent that recovery requires but I’ve seem to developed a flaw (for lack of a better word) that strikes me as very hard to rectify.

Anyone lose their mojo (to whatever degree) and find it hard to get back?

Intothebluesky

I get this. I try to do just a little everyday when it is like this. Even 10-20 minutes of something to get going

icewater1961

Yes I feel your pain. Everyone says that life gets better in sobriety but alcohol cost me my self confidence (and a lot more!) It was also a terrible depressant. I am still struggling to dig my way out of a black hole, but there is hope and there is help. Don't be too hard on yourself.

daredevil

thanks icewater1961; I appreciate your sentiment.

Rar

I get this too Daredevil. My husband started calling me a recluse. I have to make myself go out and do things. I'm trying.

JeffreyAK

A few months sober is fantastic, but it's still really early for most people recovering from alcohol addiction. Give it time, you'll probably find that your energy and motivation come back, I did - but it took me nearly a year. Before that I was kinda just knocking off the days, one by one, and putting more distance between me and my previous lifestyle.

Dave42001

I can relate!!

As long as you stay sober good positive things will happen!!

SoberTyger

I have always been ashy person, and even more so after years of confidence destroying alcoholism, and at any previous attempt at staying sober i was also very much avoiding pretty much every thing.

The big difference for me now has been working the 12 steps of AA with a good sponsor, facing and learning to deal with many of my inner fears and resentments really felt like lifting a ton of stones from my heart and mind, and I am much more outgoing now than i ever was, even before alcoholism took over my life.

I engage in much more activities and also find it much easier to just strike up a conversation with strangers... I am still a bit of a shy and reserved guy and that's just fine, but i don't feel held back in any way by it

BreezyFe

I'm new to sobriety (again) and I found that I'm making appts (hair, eye dr etc) and having my daughter/son/or hubby go with me. That way it forces me to go out and not cancel.
Like Rar, I became a recluse-I only would go out if I REALLY needed to. I'm also trying but noticed the more I went out the more I wanted to stay out

Gottalife

I can lose my mojo from time to time. Usually it is because I have become a little blocked off from the sunlight of the spirit, got back into self will, doing things I shouldn't or not doing things I should. It is not always solved like an AA issue. Sometmes I have to square things with people around me, or take a look at myself and ask Him for a bit of help to remove what is blocking me.

Sometimes, working with another alcoholic will save the day, if I happen to be in a position to do that.

Whatever it is, I usually have to do something. Even if it is something medical, I need to see the doc and take the treatment.

daredevil

thanks G; you nailed it on the head--there is stuff I need to do and not doing/having done it is causing discomfort. I'm gonna get on it.

Dropsie

So true, Mike and everyone.

Thanks.

ScottFromWI

There's a lot of things that are uncomfortable to us after we quit drinking unfortunately. Every time you do one of them though, they become less uncomfortable and each one is a learning experience. AKA - it gets better ;-)

lessgravity

I find that my procrastination has in fact ramped up in the 40 days since I stopped drinking.

Used to attribute not following through, not returning calls, putting off work at work to my hangovers or drinking life.

Now I can't do so.

I find that my procrastination is an addiction of sorts too - addicted to the stress that comes from having things last minute, the worry and frustration I get when things aren't how they should be because I avoided them so much. I think in ways I've grown so used to those chemical/mind reactions and emotions that I put myself in bad situations through procrastination.

Oy.

There's work to do!

daredevil

me too less, I find myself similarly vexed.

only when I feel daunted by the gravity of a situation do I act.

waynetheking

For me my priorities changed. What I thought was important while drinking was way less important while sober. Therefore I did not give it any effort. My mojo was not lost, it was rediscovered. Sobriety took all presidence. Nothing else mattered.
You can't be lazy about your sobriety. If you are, the disease will win and eventually kill you off.
So don't worry about the car needing a wash or the attic in disarray. Not unless that helps you in your sobriety. Just get busy on your recovery and don't stop. That's the key.

MindfulMan

There's a support group for this problem.

It's called everybody.

Dropsie

I have had huge procrastination problems my whole life and they became much worse since I stopped drinking.

I think its all the same thing. Avoidance and self destruction but in different clothing with a dose of emotional avoidance thrown in to join the party. Now that we don't drink we need other ways to be miserable.

This is why I think the steps when applied properly help so many people get to the cause of their emotional issues and maintain a healthly relationship with themselves.

Gottalife

Parkinson's law on procrastination: "Delay is the deadliest form of denial"