Adam2017

It's been about 2 months since I stopped drinking every night. I had enough after about 3 years drinking progressively more and more. Since I stopped I have been suffering what I think is PAWS: random headaches, aches and pains, brain fog, severe anxiety, etc. I have good and bad days, but overall things seem to be getting better. In the last 2 months I slipped up twice, but both times only drinking half of what I used to. I have read that bingeing will put you back at the beginning in terms of withdrawals. But I don't understand how this works. If your body takes so long to heal, why/how does it immediately revert to square one when you have a few drinks one time?
Also, I know PAWS symptoms are protracted - but not totally sure what that means. I drank fairly heavily for 2.5 years - can I expect for it to take 2 years to get back to normal?

biminiblue

For the binge/withdrawal cycle, here's a good read:

Kindling - NIH article

Someone will post the PAWS one, I'm sure...for me it took over a year and it was a markedly noticeable improvement at about three months, then six months, and finally at around ten months. The desire to drink slowly went away and the physical/cognitive improvements were slow and sometimes unnoticeable until I looked back.

Mac4711

Here’s the PAWS link that I think Bimini is talking about:
https://digital-dharma.net/post-acut...r-immediately/

doggonecarl

It might be withdrawal related, it might be post-withdrawal symptoms. Or it might be totally unrelated to your quitting drinking. Have you taken your concerns to your doctor?

ScottFromWI

I would lean toward the Kindling side of things Chad, sorry you aren't feeling well. Even drinking a smaller amount after you've quit for a while can "reset" your withdrawals, and sometimes make them even worse. No one really knows "why", but it definitely happens.

"PAWS" is generally something that happens quite a bit later - many months or even years into complete sobriety. It's also not a diagnosable condition, either from a psychological or medical standpoint, but more a wide array of symptoms common to those who were once addicts.

But as Carl says too, it could be completely unrelated to drinking at all - getting a checkup is always a good idea after quitting, even if you aren't having bad symptoms.

Adam2017

It definitely helps to read similar stories on SR. I feel like I'm going crazy and I'm just desperate to feel normal again. I opened up to my doctor and she thought the drinking was self-medicating for anxiety. Which to some extent is true. But I think my anxiety now comes from not drinking. I am trying Zoloft to ease the anxiety and also because deep down I believe that I have always suffered from depression. It's too early to tell if it will work; I still feel detached from reality, and waiting for this phase to pass only adds to the anxiety. Also Xanax really helps, but I'm careful with that and don't take it unless I'm having a really bad day. I don't want to miss out on life - but in many ways this feeling is worse than being stuck in the drinking cycle. 2 months in I feel like I should be making more progress, especially mentally.

biminiblue

Adam, just keep doing the next right thing. I think it's really common to be frustrated with the slow healing that happens. I remember at about a month sober saying, "But I just want to be normal NOW."

It takes time. Try not to spend a lot of your energy worrying about it. You are going to heal, keep eating well and getting some exercise and sleep.

Continuous, uninterrupted sober time is what is needed.

ScottFromWI

Have you considered seeing a therapist or a counselor Adam? I dealt with ( and still deal with ) anxiety. I went a good 2 years sober before I finally got serious about addressing it. I found that most medical doctors lean towards meds right away too, but for the most part I believe they only treat the symptoms - not the root cause - of many mental issues.

I also had to accept that my Anxiety was part of the fabric of who I am, much like I had to accept my addiction. That's not to say that you cannot make improvements to your life and reduce the bad symptoms - you absolutely can. But most mental ilnesses aren't like a virus where your body just completely eliminates it out of your system. Our minds can learn new ways to cope and deal with life, but I have accepted that I'm simply a more anxious person than some others, just like something is different about my relationship with alchohol than most other people.

You are smart to be careful with the benzos - they are in essence alcohol in pill form in their affect on the brain, and alcoholics are very susceptible to benzo abuse. And benzo withdrawals make alcohol withdrawal look like a cakewalk.

Mac4711

In months 2 and 3 brain fog peaked for me. I was reduced to the level of village idiot and was unable to perform routine analytical tasks. The fog started to dissipate in month 5 and 3 months later it is completely gone (for now lol!).
Your timeline may be different, but just remain patient and there will be the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.
Although I would be very concerned about the occasional slips and to what extent they impact the rewiring of the neural pathways.

Rar

I can attest to the brain fog. I'm only on Day 52, but the other day I was so foggy that I couldn't even count my golf strokes on a par 3 course.