RapidMan

So it's been over six months now since I stopped drinking.

I made a conscious decision when I first stopped not to go and get a liver function test, since after decades of alcoholism I knew at that point it would be bad, fatty liver for sure, maybe worse.
So I figured wait a few months let my liver start the recovery process, then get checked out.

Trouble is, as time goes by, I find the prospect more and more terrifying. I've stopped drinking, thats pretty much all I can do, there isn't a magic pill to take, so 'what if' keeps running through my mind.

I've also taken to looking for symptoms; phantom pains on my side, looking at my eyes for signs of jaundice, every time I itch, seems to be sending me into abject panic.

I know it will pass, and I know sooner or later I have to go to see what the damage is, but it doesn't do much to ease the fear!

Zebra1275

Man up, and get checked out.

Otherwise the anxiety may give you a heart attack.

Obladi

RapidMan, I understand. The problem with not knowing, though, is that we make stuff up to worry about. So either way, it's paralyzing. Right?

Get yourself checked out. I also drank for decades and only had "slightly elevated" liver enzymes plus also I no longer need blood pressure pills.

See? It ain't always bad.

ScottFromWI

It's actually a pretty liberating experience, you won't regret it at all.

Dee74

I felt like I almost deserved a bad result from all the drinking I did.
When I eventually got mine done all was fine RapidMan

my advice is go ahead and do it.

If you feel fine otherwise the overwhelming chances are everything's fine liver wise too... in the unlikely event its not, it really is best to catch anything early than too late.

The liver is pretty good at repairing itself if we treat it kindly.

SickInLove

I can totally relate to this! I posted last week the same thing. My anxiety about the damage I caused to my body from drinking was ruining my life. I too felt the pain in my side, obsessively checked my eyes, worried about every itch and ache. I had a appt yesterday and my doctor refereed me to get a ultrasound of my liver and gallbladder. I'm going tomorrow morning. I'm a nervous wreck but also relieved to finally get this stress off of my shoulders. Tomorrow will be 1 week sober for me. I don't have any advice but just letting you know you aren't alone.

aasharon90

Why waste a minute more of worrying
is what I learned early on in recovery.

With all the shenanigans I did while under
the influence of a control substance, poison,
addiction to alcohol, I thought I had picked
up some horrible disease and needed to put
my mind to rest and find out immediately.

So I made my appointment to have a full
physical, blood test of all kinds to put my
mind at ease. To take RESPONSIBILITY
for my actions of the past.

Sure enough, once I went for my tests
and got the results, I was totally grateful
and blessed to not have picked up something
horrific out there in the world.

WHY WASTE A MINUTE OF WORRYING?

I remind myself this so often when
anything in life disturb the calm waters
of my recovery/sobriety way of life.

FBL

I can totally understand your worry. I was deathly afraid of going to the doctor and/or dentist and avoided both for well over 20 years. Once I sobered up, I decided it was time to start taking responsibility for my health and now I get regular check-ups from both. In fact, my doctor can't believe how much my overall health has improved since I quit drinking. After eight years sober, he still comments on it! The sooner you get it checked out, the sooner you'll stop worrying.

WaterOx

I'm another one with little advice since I'm going through something similar.

Although six months sober is amazing so congratulations to that. I just went to the Doc and had blood drawn. His overall opinion is that it's likely to come out ok but (like others here) I am halfway convinced I deserve a bad outcome. Every little thing has me on high alert.

I guess the difference for me is I can't take the anxiety of not knowing. I am terrified right about now waiting for the results but maybe that's good. I want whatever I can to help me not drink in the future. Today is day two, after all. lol!

andyh

go & get checked out - it'll do wonders for your blood pressure

WakkaWakkaATL

Hey man go get checked out, you sounds like me when I know the paycheck is almost burned though and I refuse to check my balance!

Seriously though, of all the things an alcoholic can do to themselves, fatty liver is one of the things that clears up on its own pretty quickly after quitting alcohol.

Shitzupuppy

Hey you need to go get checked out.
My lver is ok but my pancreas is fubar from alcohol abuse.
I suggest others also ask their doctore to check the pancreas. Mine was discovered on accident on a CT scan for something unrelated.

Just sayin

I'm not happy obviously but it's better to treat it than ignore it.

KES06

Just do it! You deserve to be healthy. I think us recovering alchies feel we "deserve" to be sick for all of the abuse we put our bodies through, but that is simply not the case. I had not taken care of myself for 20 years, so I went to the doctor, got blood tests etc and they were fine. Dee is right. It is a liberating feeling. And even if you do have "fatty liver" that can be corrected. Don't be afraid.
Check in with us, RapidMan.

zjw

health anxiety is a pretty common issue when we get sober. I had my blood run at my docs suggestion for no other reason then because. I'm glad i did i was able to fix a few things but in my case I'm certainly not eager to do it again. I routinely pass out when i get a blood draw and its very scary.

I can understand your anxiety tho. I always say i'll die of unknown causes one day because I simply wont go to the doctor lol.

That being said when i'm anxious enough about it eventually it comes to a head and i go to the doctor just to relieve the anxiety.

For example i went to the dentist for the firt time IN i dunno 25 years? casue i chipped a tooth. I was absolultly terrified. I got there and it was the first time I expierenced derealization type stuff since i got sober. He told me all sorts of things I have no idea what he was talkign about or what he said casue i was a total mess. In the end i have to get this tooth pulled. Now i've sat on my laurels about it becuase I"m scared and also scheduling constraints. But i'm gonna get it taken care of. Its just taking me a little more time then the next guy to get my act together is all.

My point is I can relate. But sometimes you just have to go.