Abigmess

Does anyone want to talk about how much we all love drinking. I personally wish I could drink all the time but I know I can't anymore . I've done wrong drunk to many times I know I can't do it anymore. A big part of me still thinks I can drink, but deep down I know I'm done

August252015

I hope - for you and everyone else who feel this way- that the problem and the wish will be removed. For me, I have zero desire to drink. I am grateful for that, and pray it remains that way and also keep working my butt off in a hard program to stay spiritually fit. I know many feel quite differently.

Good luck - keep going no matter what the AV tells you.

JeffreyAK

I have no wish anymore, at all, and I think in time you won't desire it either. I'm not sure it helps to feed that wish, which is just your addict voice - maybe distract yourself when you feel like you miss drinking, and avoid giving that thought any life?

tomsteve

I USED to love drinking. but it turned into a love hate relationship- alcohol loved to make me hate myself. I was using it to TRY and stop the guilt and remorse of my actions, but it never worked.
what did work was facing me- looking at my past actions and learning the why of it all.

doggonecarl

And perpetuate the struggle?

No thanks.

When I was actively drinking, I loved drinking. Or so I told myself. My failure to quit the first time proved to me the motivation to drink daily was "need" not love. There's a difference. I didn't "love" being addicted to alcohol. So I quit. And now I love not drinking.

ScottFromWI

It's common to have feelings for the "good times" and for the most part many of us did early in our drinking careers, but as you point out yourself you know there is too much "bad" that goes along with it as well.

The main focus here on SR is to talk about how to deal with those feelings and how to change our outlook on life in general. Be comforted to know that they will pass and it will get better as you build sober time. I certainly still have memories of the past and some of them are good times I had while drinking, but i don't "long" to drink anymore. You can get there too.

2ndhandrose

What was there to love?

Regret, remorse, sickness, drunken rages about nothing, self hatred, fear, hangovers, depression, a brain turned to mush, isolation, hopelessness.

Every time I pass a liquor store, I send up a prayer of thanks that I don't have to go in, give them my hard earned money, just to experience all of the above.

zjw

i wont lie often it sounds like a friggen fabulous idea for like a few seconds till i think about all the other crap that goes along with it. and its like yeah i guess that would suck huh.. then the desire just gets zapped out of me and i have little interest in it.

i read one the otherd ay about some new synthetic alcohol they are working on where you can only get so drunk and no hangovers and supposivly safe at first i thought eureka then i thoguht waith i can only get so drunk? man tha twould **** me off if i cant get falling down black out drunk every time i drink thers no ponit i'd just get angry.

I read another one about some pill they are working on drink like crazy then pop said pill and your sober again. I also then thought wow eureka!! and i'm liek wait a sec this cant possibly be healthty.

The reality is i'll never win the battle if i wanna try and wrestle with the bottle.

Ariesagain

From the perspective of almost nine months...I didn't love drinking. Toward the end my stomach used to knot up before the first sip. What I craved was that twenty minutes of numb...but then it would go away and leave me with heartburn and a headache. So rinse, repeat...then wake up at 3:15 a.m. with my heart pounding and all my anxiety demons screaming.

I still struggle with dealing with "life on life's terms," especially as I am dealing with a bunch of hugely stressful crap, but I don't miss drinking.

tekink

I had a love/hate relationship. I couldn't get anything done once I cracked a bottle and it sapped my creative motivation. As a musician that kinda sucks and always had me wanting to quit in the back of my mind. That was a voice I could easily kill.

Now that I've damaged my liver I don't want to die and leave my wife sad. I'm not looking back.

shauninspain

When ever I get the urge to drink, which is thankfully rare these days, I close my eyes and try to imagine how it will pan out.

I know that I will walk to a shop, excited that I am going to indulge. I'll have a few drinks and I'll get that warm feeling inside, which I will enjoy. I'll have a few more drinks and I'll lay down on the sofa. I'll continue to drink and the warm feeling will turn into a numbness. I'll then have to go back to the shop to buy some more. More drinking will follow and at some point I'll fall asleep. Upon awakening I will drink what is left and go out again for some more. I will be feeling slightly ill by this point, but I'll know that alcohol will take away the discomfort.

During the 2nd day I will lapse in and out of consciousnesses, feeling sick whenever I am awake. I'll start to fall over or have accidents. Trips to the shop will become increasingly difficult, to the point of physically painful.

At some point I will black out. I will awake again, but this time in a police cell, without any recollection of why I am there. I'll spend a few hours in utter fear and misery wondering how it could have gotten out of hand again.

Once I have imagined all of this, my desire to drink will have passed!!

fini

Does anyone want to talk about how much we all love drinking.

we don't all love drinking, Abigmess.
i didn't drink because i loved it, but because i couldn't not, mostly.
my choice was impaired.
that in itself was torture to me.

dox

When I used to like drinking, I liked the effect that it had on me.
Then, I didn't like the effect it had on me and neither did anyone close to me.
Unfortunately, even though we didn't like the effect for the last X years of drinking, I carried on -- regardless.

That age when I liked drinking is greatly overshadowed by the more recent era of my drinking -- when I didn't like it but told myself that I did.
So, I never would have, nor could have, stopped on my own.
Thank goodness that there are so many people willing to help a drunkard put down the booze.
All we have to do is ask for help and be honestly willing to put in the work required.

When I drank, even when I liked it, I was usually an -------, a selfish one.
When I got help and stopped drinking I became a much better man.

So, in a round about way, I suppose my answer to the first question is:
No.
I don't want to talk about how much we all love drinking.
I don't love it.
I don't even like it.
No, not one little bit.

I wish you all a happy sober life,
even if you still think that you love drinking.

Mountainmanbob

So grateful to have the same -- no desire to ever drink again.
I used to not think so but,
it's so nice to have a clear mind today.

For too many years I fought hard to get out of my mind.
Yes, today I see that as crazy thinking.
For the mind is a precious thing.

M-Bob

FBL

MY SR handle is FormerBeerLover for a reason. I used to love it, til it started hating me back. I'm just grateful I had the sense to leave it all behind before it killed me.

Optimini

I was just thinking the last few nights how happy I am that I stopped drinking. I remember nights when I was trying to fall asleep how I felt so unhealthy crashing out while drunk and also felt something was very off about my body, damaged or 'soured' perhaps. I was wondering if my body was sending me little hints that I was on the road to a very serious health problem, and this is just laying in bed - not being physical.

This last week I noticed how I feel so much better and don't have several of the bad feelings and problems I used to have. I like to focus on how I feel so good now, rather than the false perceptions of what I used to think was positive about drinking.
Do I have occasional cravings? Yes. But I have gotten past the habit and ritual of drinking, and now I have momentum as I pass 1.5 months. I keep reminding myself how much time I wasted on drinking which did absolutely nothing positive for me.
There's really nothing positive to reminisce about, IMO.

Lightning Bug

Any love I had for drinking was shot to hell when my head made contact with a toilet and I woke up alone and soaked to the bone in toilet water. Any obsession I had with alcohol was shot to hell when I was being carted off to the hospital in a screaming ambulance. Any care I ever felt for alcohol disappeared during my 3 day inpatient psych hold. Any thoughts I have for ever drinking again are immediately shot, gutted and thrown to the bottom feeders where they belong.

MIRecovery

As I sobered up I realized that alcohol wanted me dead but not before I had given it everything I loved and was important to me. Once I saw alcohol for what it was the love affair ended. One gift I will be eternally grateful for is I have never forgotten how bad my life was at the end of my drinking

SnazzyDresser

Original post makes me angry for its presumption and all-around wrongness. I hate drinking for what it did to me. It's all a sham, the romance of alcohol. Good riddance.

BrendaChenowyth

Holy smokes... all kinds of wrong up in here... *Moonwalks carefully out of the room*