StormiNormi

I am under pressure with my d/o to -need/require sobriety. It is expected in my relationship wuth my RAH.
Omg, 10 years now.... I am no closer to sobriety than before . no worse mind you, but not on the poster list..yet
I honestly dont believe I have a problem. He thinks anyone who' drinks is alcoholic. This is ruining our ralationship. I thinkthink he is projectcting his issues on to me.

Whodathunk

Regardless of if you think you are an alcoholic or not, he sounds like he simply thinks you drink too much and that it is affecting your relationship.

Do you think he is completely wrong?

What is the 10 years you referred to, the length of your relationship?

Clearly your drinking is an issue to him. It may be his problem, it may be yours.

Have you tried couples counseling? Maybe a professional can help you see if alcohol is the true problem or maybe you two have other root issues.

There are some simple "Am I An Alcoholic?" questionnaires if you google it. Have you done that? What did the results tell you?

MariahGayle

Glad to see you here Stormi & sorry you are having troubles in your relationship. Quite a few of us still in the April 2014 class if you want to join us there again. Be good to yourself Stormi!

Dee74

Hi StormiNormi

The obvious response is if you don't really have a problem why not just quit & make your husband happy? No big ask, right?

You've been here a long time - husband or not, I think that would be odd for you to keep coming back here if you really didn't have a problem?

D

Gottalife

As a recovered alcoholic myself who was married for twenty years to a wife who was a social drinker and after her death had an 8 year relationship with another non alcoholic, I never had a problem with their drinking. my alcoholism is not their problem and I would never pressure them to quit for my benefit. They have a free choice to drink or not which is the advantage of being non alcoholic.

Some long time sober alcoholics I know still have a real problem being around people who drink. It is their choice of course, but I wouldn't consider myself recovered in the AA sense if I expected all around me to stop drinking too. My life would still be controlled by alcohol.

Maybe you could stop for his benefit if you wanted too. But there are three questions which only you can answer. Why is it such an issue for him? Is he shaky in his own sobriety? Have you given him any cause to believe you are alcoholic. Honest answers to those questions will shed light on the truth.

Dee74

You could be right GL...

or it might just be the case like it was with me - my partner/s knew I was drinking too much, they could see it was a problem and they asked, begged, pleaded with me to stop...but I saw no problem.

D

Whodathunk

StormiNormi, can you fill us in on these missing details? You can tell we want to help if we can.