talldude

Not too many folks at work know the struggle that I've went through in the last year. It's been the worst year of my life because of the emotional swings involved. Somehow I survived though.

Today I felt something I have not felt in a long time - pride. I realize that some people expect me to hang my head and feel sorry for the selfish, obnoxious jerk that I've been; but I'm tired of the pity trip.

As I regain some pride, I'm also realizing that some of my co-workers are quite arrogant, yet they didn't appear that arrogant to me during my drinking days, which tells you how arrogant my drunk self was. lol

In my sobriety I'm realizing that one of the things that led to me drinking more and more was worrying about what people thought about me. The more I drank, the less they thought of me...the less they thought of me, the more I drank...and so on and so forth. lol

This little bit of pride that I am feeling feels damn good. It's reminding me that I am on the right path, regardless of whether people will respect me or not. Gotta do this for me and forget the naysayers. )

ScottFromWI

Sounds like a great realization talldude, thanks for sharing. Glad to see you are gaining some clarity over time - it does take a while but it's a fantastic reward.

zjw

gotta do what works for you to keep yourself sober happy healthy sane confident etc.. then you can be good things for other people. and then there will still be people you cant please thats just life just is what it is no big deal son long as your sober happy healty sane etc...

least

It was a great realization when I no longer woke up hating myself. I felt good about myself and no longer hated my life.

JK130

That's impressive. Good for you!