bcamp

I find it hard to believe that I could make it all the way through cancer treatment, and still return to my wicked ways...

Two years ago I was diagnosed with a type of cancer that caused me to have all of my abdominal lymph nodes removed. Pretty big surgery, scar from my belt to my sternum. In the hospital for a week on heavy pain meds...

Came home with my bottle of Oxycontin (which i fell in love with). I was alcohol free for two weeks until the pills ran out. When the pills ran out I called a buddy to get me a bag of weed ( which i hadn't previously done in years) in an effort to match some of the numbness the pills gave me. That worked well for another couple weeks until I was pretty recovered.

After that, back to the booze. Life has carried on as normal ever since. I'm still amazed at myself that something so major can happen to me yet I still take life for granted. To be honest, it's a good thing I don't know anyone to get more pills from. I'd probably be able to add another substance to my list of long term abusing...

I'm trying to turn a new leaf today. I'm still hungover from a weekend of binging, and swearing to myself i'll never drink again. I don't want to. Problem is, i know myself... I want to be sober, but do I really...?

Anna

Well, that's the question you need to answer. Stopping drinking and recovering is hard and you need all the motivation you can muster in order to make it work. I'm glad you've recovered from the cancer. I hope that you decide to stop drinking.

tomsteve

Why would ya want to stay a drunk?

MIRecovery

When the fear of staying the same out weighed the fear of change I decided I could not go on as I was. I went to a doctor, went to IOP, and AA 6 days a week. I became willing to do whatever I had to to stay sober.

Soberwolf

What Anna said