14 months and wobbling
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,805
Bounced, I belong to the October 2013 class and lately we all have been lamenting that the "just one won't hurt me"/ "surely now I can moderate since I have learned so much" AV voice has come back strong for most of us. I hit 14 months sober on Saturday, so I wonder if there is something to this time period and cravings?!? The first year we are so hell bent on getting through all of the "milestones", that year two does seem to leave a little loose footing and no close enough memories to remind us how bad the alcohol cycle was for us.
For me, my self respect and feeling in control of myself at all times, is something I just don't want to gamble with. The "relief" of the short termed high just isn't worth everything that comes with it anymore. I think you are very wise to come back to SR. Reading relapse threads and how miserable those members usually seem to be, is enough for me to "take their word for it."
For me, my self respect and feeling in control of myself at all times, is something I just don't want to gamble with. The "relief" of the short termed high just isn't worth everything that comes with it anymore. I think you are very wise to come back to SR. Reading relapse threads and how miserable those members usually seem to be, is enough for me to "take their word for it."
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 353
Thanks Bounce for starting this thread
I have hit 13 months getting closer to my 14 months, like you I have been wanting the drink but only for the pleasure of what I think is relaxation after a hard day at work. What is one drink going to hurt, but I know if I play that drink out to the end I will see myself where I was 13 months ago, in no control over my drinking, forgetting things and the shame of what I might have said or did.. but even with those thoughts I think I could still handle one. But Like DD said AV is coming back full strength after being silent for so long.
I have hit 13 months getting closer to my 14 months, like you I have been wanting the drink but only for the pleasure of what I think is relaxation after a hard day at work. What is one drink going to hurt, but I know if I play that drink out to the end I will see myself where I was 13 months ago, in no control over my drinking, forgetting things and the shame of what I might have said or did.. but even with those thoughts I think I could still handle one. But Like DD said AV is coming back full strength after being silent for so long.
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 818
Bounced, thanks for sharing your thoughts. DoubleDragons shared this thread in our October 2013 class thread. We are all at around 13-14 months sober and several of us are experiencing the feelings you described.
Personally, I feel like what others have shared ... the first year was all about milestones. Now that I'm on the second lap, the level of "excitement" has diminished. Been there done that. The first year felt like a vessel being being pushed out of the harbor by a tug. Now it feels like I'm under my own power and facing an open ocean.
Like you mentioned, I'm feeling the need to strengthen my spiritual foundation. If the first year of milestones helped to carry me along, I need something else as I move forward.
Thanks again for sharing.
Personally, I feel like what others have shared ... the first year was all about milestones. Now that I'm on the second lap, the level of "excitement" has diminished. Been there done that. The first year felt like a vessel being being pushed out of the harbor by a tug. Now it feels like I'm under my own power and facing an open ocean.
Like you mentioned, I'm feeling the need to strengthen my spiritual foundation. If the first year of milestones helped to carry me along, I need something else as I move forward.
Thanks again for sharing.
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 219
I must admit I find it odd --one incident and five years later the trust still couldn't be restored. Well I hope you don't drink. Seems every time people on here mention having a relapse after a long time the drinking got worse than it was before
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Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Centry fl
Posts: 214
Originally Posted by bounced 
It's all my fault really. Infidelity. Just the one time (literally once) but the trust has gone. We have had about 5 years of counseling, on and off, but it just won't fix.
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Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Centry fl
Posts: 214
Originally Posted by bounced
It's all my fault really. Infidelity. Just the one time (literally once) but the trust has gone. We have had about 5 years of counseling, on and off, but it just won't fix.
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Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Centry fl
Posts: 214
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Originally Posted by bounced
It's all my fault really. Infidelity. Just the one time (literally once) but the trust has gone. We have had about 5 years of counseling, on and off, but it just won't fix.
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 174
Originally Posted by bounced
but I don't have any spiritual influences.
For me it is essential that I continue to enlarge my spiritual life because drinking or not drinking I can become spiritually sick. And this will eventually lead me back to a drink.
Congratulations on 14 months btw it would be a crying shame to give it all up and go back to a life of misery, believe me,I have not long escaped from that living hell.
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