ForMeForThem

I'm looking through old pictures. Seeing pictures from my drinking years makes me sad. There were so many good times with my kids, milestones, vacations, memorable moments and celebrations that I want to remember with happiness. I wish I could enjoy looking at these pictures and enjoy the memories. But the pictures just remind me of my descent into alcoholism and make me feel upset with myself. I'm just over a year sober and right now it's hard to look at them without feeling pain and regret. I hope one day I'll be able to look at them differently. Thanks for listening - I just needed to put my feelings out there.

Carbonized

The more i look around the more i get the feeling that this is a rather familier feeling. I don't have the pictures but the memories work just the same. Hope it goes well for you in the future.

Impurrfect

I totally understand what you are feeling. I wasn't an alcholic, but a drug user. There are special events that I wasn't a part of, due to my using.

What helps me is to make the most of today, one day at a time. I cannot undo the times I wasn't there for the ones I love, but I CAN make the most of the times I am there for them.

I come from a family of dysfunction, and sad to say, it is in my favor that I've chosen recovery. Other loved ones did not do the same.

We can't undo the past. What we can do is make the most of every single day we have. IME, the "bad stuff" fades away as we are present in the lives of the ones we love.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

SoberLeigh

I know what you mean, ForMeForThem. While most of the wreckage from my alcoholism was internal, when I look at photographs from family events during my 9 to 10 year alcoholic drinking time, my friend Chardonnay is always right beside me. Too bad I wasn't fully 'present'; yes, sad, really sad.

huntingtontx

I am sorry you are feeling sad. You should feel good that those days are behind you. I am proud of you and I sure your family is too. We can't change the past, but we can make the future one we can be proud of. Big hug.

Soberwolf

This

lostinthetrees

I understand how you're feeling...

OklaBH

I think about it frequently. Your over a year sober. That speaks volumes if ur live for yourself and family.

Hevyn

I believe you will feel differently one day FMFT. I had the same experience, and even threw a bunch of pictures out - but eventually I had to stop torturing myself with negative thoughts. I agree with Impurrfect - the bad stuff fades away as our new life takes over. All those things that happened make up who we are now. I think we're pretty great.

LBrain

there were good times and memories. do not let your feelings of the past bring you down.
be thankful you had them and strive to make a difference going forward. We must not let the past rule us.

MIRecovery

I know what you mean. My daughter died a few months ago and it hurts so much to think of the wasted days.

I have to go on and do what I can to make amends to myself and loved ones