Life Happenings: Late For Work, So Much Better Sober

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11-06-2014, 06:41 PM

# 21 (permalink)

MIRecovery

A Day at a Time

Join Date: Sep 2012

Location: Grand Rapids MI

Posts: 6,435

I bought a brand new lawn mower and hit a tree stump doing serious damage. Late happens but so does stupid.

I love being sober and dumb

11-09-2014, 11:02 PM

# 22 (permalink)

MelindaFlowers

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Join Date: Jun 2010

Location: California

Posts: 2,693

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackToSquareOne

This thread makes me think back to my drinking days, there was always a subliminal sense of guilt going on. Maybe it was a combo package of guilt, fear and anxiety and always at its worst when the alcohol wore off. All the stories I had to concoct to try to cover the tracks of my drinking or hangovers. Even if I thought I got away with it my own mind never let me off the hook that easy. So glad I no longer have to live like that!

Yes! The subliminal sense of guilt. I'm trying to think of an example. Okay, let's say I was hungover and running late but then by some miracle all the lights were green and I got there on time. I would still be haunted the rest of the day by the "what if's" and guilt. There were always so many "what if's" when I was drinking. What if they alarm didn't go off? What if my car battery died? What if I can't find my keys? No clean laundry? The boss calls at 8 pm? What if? What if? What if? This includes both the fear and anxiety.

The subliminal sense of guilt also because I knew I was half-as*ing my way though life. Doing the bare minimum but someone getting away with it. Only a matter of time before the s--- would hit the fan. Constant fear and sense of doom.

You hit this one right on the nose!