caboblanco

A bad immature mindset. I don't do facebook but I still come across people I haven't seen in a long time occasionally. Conversation usually goes like this...Hey what are you doing now?...what happened to that thing? ..what happened to this?..awkward moment..hey give me your phone number..

I feel like i'm rewound the tape to 16 years ago or so

all the crap..all my fake friends..the pettiness..trying to be a hot shot to fit in or to be admired..I can honestly say I didn't have any real friends back then...everybody was in it for something else then friendship

people expected me to turn out to be something..i was going that route..but changed a lot along the way

i don't care to compare and contrast my life with people i see from the past..that seems to be all they are interested in..that seems to be all the ever were interested in..maybe next time i see somebody like that i'll just tell them i have no time to talk

any thoughts

jdooner

Cabo - a couple thoughts:

I try not to live in the past or in the future but stay in the present - easier said than done.

When I feel vulnerable, which can often happen when I feel I don't fit in then my ego can be bruised and I find my addictions call out. I realize its a coping mechanism but none the less they still call out - I just have tools now.

Why do people talk aboutthe weather? Because its a common denominator. If you see someone from the past its like talking about the weather to discuss the old days. I doubt they mean anythign by it. If your like me you might be over analyzing in your head.

james186

I know that feeling well. In recent years I've been trying to 'reinvent' myself and build a new life out of the ashes of my old one, but no one seems to want to let me do that. I have friends that assume I'm the same person I was 15 years ago and it's just not like that. People expect me to be a certain way and be interested in things I'm not. I've moved on, but not in thier eyes. I think that's true of everyone from your past though; they expect you to be the person they have in thier mind, not the one you actually are.

This is one reason why I don't want to drink any more; my drunken brain has a 'fixed' picture of who I am and I revert back to being that person far too easily when I'm drunk (if that makes sense).

ScottFromWI

I think there are people who live in and dwell on the past in all walks of life. You see them in the workplace - they are the ones who do things a certain way because "that's the way we've always done it". In social circles they are the ones who cling to the past and dress/talk/pretend they are still in college. In older age they are the ones that constantly lament about how things were so much better "back in my time"

I know it's not possible to completely avoid them, but I try my best. It might sound selfish but to me there's a lot more important things to do. I can only control how I spend my time, and frankly i'm wasting it by hanging around those types of people.

Gilmer

I have tried to reach out to people I knew in the past. Out of about 10, three actually were interested in discussion of our lives as they are now, and the journey we'd taken to get there. The rest were locked into their past perceptions of our mutual roles, and didn't seem willing to accept the fact that I had grown. I don't think it's a coincidence that those people are very shallow spiritually--they have no inner life except what unfolds on the exterior every day.

Everybody was shocked that I've been married for 30 years and have five children!

One icebreaker question if you actually are interested in getting to know somebody from your past again: ask them, "Has your life gone the way you planned?" Everybody's got some deviation. If they're open to you, they'll tell you the story; if not, just smile superficially and move on.

caboblanco

yeah I don't like it...fake people from the past asking me a million questions..

at my father's funeral 8 years ago i remember people showing up at the wake that weren't me or my fathers friend at all...just you know

One guy came specifically to ask about my fathers office which would shortly be on the market because he died a couple days ago..these are the people of my past..id like to turn the page

Gilmer

Vultures! It would be easier if we didn't even have to greet them at public functions! I wish I had some kind of snappy answer to something like that.