RocketQueen

So, I've found myself living in a homeless shelter in the middle of nowhere. There is literally nothing to do here but talk to the other people, and share our stories. Man, it's effing depressing! Every conversation is about or leads to drinking/drugging stories. If not that, then it's stories of abuse, jail, death, etc. With people constantly coming and going, the same stories are continuously circulating. For a year and a half I managed to avoid such conversations with people. Not so much any more.

I'm seriously struggling to keep faking laughter at the tales of peoples "awesome and totally hilarious" drunken antics, and I'm most certainly not going to chime in with my own, because it's not something I'm particularly proud of nor willing to share. After 3 days I've found myself becoming increasingly bitter and angry at these people. Perhaps if I was a "normie" I could see the stories for what they are intended to be; just funny tales. But, I don't find them funny at all. I guess because of my own experiences I can see past all that and into the darker side.

I'm over it. Why can't we just talk about the weather and leave it at that? *sigh*

End rant.

biminiblue

Can you find AA meetings in the area? The war stories you hear in AA are more like cautionary tales, and there are solutions offered instead of just romanticizing the bottle. It would give you a quiet sanctuary to go to where you can think and talk with sober people who want to stay that way.

Ryno03272009

I have been where you are while new to sobriety. The thing that worked for me is listening to their drunken antics and using those stories as a reminder of how things could be worse and how although currently homeless, at least its sober living.

Currently, I volunteer at a drug/alcohol shelter. But there are several other shelters in area that are dry shelters - persons staying have not used in past 24hours. Speak with the shelter manager and ask about getting into a dry shelter nearby. The shelter manager or volunteers at the shelter usually are willing to drop you at a meeting if you show you are on the righteous path. Also, something to remember... Not all homeless are without a vehicle. Chances are if anyone there has a car they are sober. Make friends with them and find out their story and maybe you can help each other out.

Over the years I have seen dozens of people at the shelter make friends more than just war story and/or drinking buddies. They meet up, go job hunting together. And some even find a apartment to rent together eventually.

I wish you the best of luck with everything.

yeahgr8

A "normie" wouldn't laugh at them either trust me.

Yep get to as many AA meetings as possible.

Dee74

Keep reminding yourself this is temporary RQ.
I hope you can work out something permanent really soon

best wishes
D

RocketQueen

This is a "dry shelter". (Actually, it's a "women's refuge", but from what I can tell, it's just a fancy way of saying "shelter"). I'm pretty sure it would be the same no matter where I went. There's no rules against talking about glorified drunken antics. It just makes me uncomfortable because stories of addiction, abuse, death, etc are literally all these people have in common with each other. There's only 5 of us here, so it's kinda hard to avoid it all. Triggers everywhere.

anykey

I volunteered many nights at our local shelter.

The manager did not seem to like single men there at all. They were almost treated like prisoners.

caboblanco

homeless shelters are tough for anybody...you get my respect

Ryno03272009

There ARE shelters out there that dont allow that type of discussion but they are more than just shelters - those usually involve the salvation army. They require people to stay sober and look fora job and only discuss using while at meetings or in "group" or else they boot you. I am not sure where you are staying but might be worth looking into one of those if ones near you.