justme

I don't want to believe it but I am completely one way sober and crazy once I drink! I never wanted to believe I was an alcoholic because I didn't drink everyday or get sick but when I drank 5 out of 10 times I blackout I mean I really have to make a conscious effort to not to continue to drink. Recently went to vegas and hooked up with a friend and took off by myself ended up on the floor outside my hotel door asleep, woke up and wander. How pathetic! Something horrible could of happened to me! Once my friends dropped me off in front of my house cuz I refused to go home a few days later I realized the cops came and almost arrested me but I didn't remember for a few days I completely blacked out! I also don't want to be broken but I feel at ease knowing I'm not the only one. Thank you! I'm going to stop and not pretend I really have control I'm only kidding myself! And every time I drink I am super sad even if I did nothing wrong. Ugh and if I did I'm super depressed for a few weeks any feed back would help!

caboblanco

you could just have a binge drinking problem with a bad reaction to booze ..either way you have to change something....before you get a criminal record or worse!....are you drunk now?

PurpleKnight

People who don't have a problem with drinking never ask that question!!

If you are questioning yourself, you probably have a problem!!

justme

Nope I'm not drunk , I have no desire to drink but I have friends that luv to party and I try to prove to myself I can do this I won't drink and time and time again I fail!

PurpleKnight

Not being able to control your drinking is an indication of an addiction, I am the same, I couldn't go out to a club for example and not binge drink until blacking out, I wouldn't have the control!!

jw1969

Hi jlomanzo,
I agree with purpleknight. Those who do not have a drinking problem do not wonder if they have a problem. I'll be honest, I can understand the term "problem drinker" more than the more elusive term "alcoholic". I have come to grips I am a problem drinker. If our drinking causes problems, then, that is all we need to know. I too feel terrible when I wake up after an evening of drinking even when nothing bad happens. I have also woke up discovering I did or said embarrassing things. I am trying to stop justifying my drinking because I somehow elude the clinical definition of "alcoholic", but realize that drinking is causing problems in my life. Yeah, once I drink to get where I want to be, control is becoming more fleeting than in the past, and to me that tells me all I should need to know.

I

Eddiebuckle

• I try to prove to myself I can do this I won't drink and time and time again I fail!
• I am completely one way sober and crazy once I drink
• when I drank 5 out of 10 times I blackout
• every time I drink I am super sad

So you continue to drink because .... it's not a problem? Or it's not really a choice?

matt4x4

Normal drinkers do not black out. Normal drinkers get a little bit weezy and they stop drinking and go to bed. Pathetic indeed, but normal. Yes you could have died. How are you going to stop? What is your game plan?

IOAA2

Hi. I never liked a lot of things including the word alcoholic when I was undisciplined and drinking. My reason was I didn't get honest with myself about my drinking and until I accepted the fact I could not drink in safety my life continued to be on a slippery slope towards the end. Denial is probably the biggest reason so many people don't make it. We can do it if we use the tools available for the long version of sobriety.

BE WELL

jdooner

Only you can answer this question. But you need to be really honest with yourself. Why do you think you are drinking?

While you might be a binge drinker now the progressive nature might lead you to many more binges during the week until its constant. Also there are several studies that show binging is actually worse for the body and mind.

I did not understand the extent of my problem until I got sober. I was just going to quit for a few weeks. Then after physical withdrawal I started to see my problems went a bit deeper.

Why not try a 30 day quit and see how things go. Don't tackle the big Alcoholic question at the start but maybe like me with a sober mind you will be able to analyze your motives a bit clearer.

However, you do it stick around and good luck.

huntingtontx

Welcome to SR. You will find lots of support here, and we never have to say we are anything. If you don't want to say you are an alcoholic, then don't. Just quit doing something to yourself that is so destructive. Once you quit drinking you can better look at your life and decide, am I an alcoholic? Am I a drunk? Is alcohol a problem? Am I a better person without it? You get the picture. Anyway, welcome. Glad you have joined us, and I hope you find a happy sober life.

Zebra1275

As someone else said, only you can answer that question.

But from my vantage point, the answer seems pretty obvious.

soberlicious

I think people can get hung up on labels and not get better for years because they struggle with whether they are truly "alcoholic" or not. Look, it's obvious that alcohol is causing you serious problems. The fact that you are ambivalent despite all the negative that drinking brings indicates that you are probably addicted.

Rather than ask "Am I an alcoholic?", you might want to ask "Am I the person I want to be?", "Am I at my best?"

What do you want your life to look like? Chances are drinking will only continue to get in the way of that vision.

Bluebird1927

I go on the rule that if drinking is affecting my day to day life, even if it's a massive binge on the weekend then it's a problem.
Also the fact that you've come on here in the first place would indicate to me it's playing heavy on your mind.

Good luck whatever happens :-)

Tamerua

Meh, who cares about the word? If it is making you question and making you feel like poo, give it up for 90 days and see if you feel better. Chances are you will feel amazing. welcome to SR.

LadyBlue0527

Hi jlomanzo

Welcome back to the board! When I ask myself that question what's always helpful to me is to read my prior posts on the board. If you take your mouse and click on your name on your first post you should see a drop down menu. This will allow you to find all posts that were previously created by you and also posts that you entered in threads started by others.

Reading through those can help when you're questioning if you have a problem or when your mind is trying to kid you.

I'm thinking of you and hope that you try the above and decide to stick around. You've been through a lot and it seems like you've been at this for a long time.

We can help you to stop this insanity. You have to want it first though.

EndGameNYC

You raise a very good point, jd, that often goes overlooked. When I read dozens of comments here that say something like, "I don't drink everyday; I'm only a binge drinker," "I'm only a binge drinker and don't drink during the day," "I'm only a binge drinker and only drink two or three days a week,", it raises a silent alarm for me since your comment has been born out in both clinical practice and in the research literature.

I would change or amend such comments to read something like, "I'm only a binge drinker, so I do damage to my mind and body more quickly -- and potentially more permanently -- than the average problem drinker."

I don't describe myself as a "binge drinker," if only because I pretty much drank all day long, particularly near the end. But even when I restricted my drinking to non-working and non-sleeping hours, I would drink much more than what's generally accepted to meet the criteria for binge drinking.