One year later, I'm back on SR.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
One year later, I'm back on SR.
I first came to SR a year ago, mid January 2013, because I wanted to stop drinking, after a particularly remorseful morning after. After three weeks I felt confident that I could moderate my drinking, you know, just have one or two, and started back up again the night of my step mother's birthday celebration. That led to another year of heavy drinking, not the moderate drinking I had been aiming for. Over the course of the past year, I watched my behavior, and was amazed that it looked just like the way many of the SR community members described their patterns when they used. A year ago I called myself a heavy drinker who needed to learn to moderate. Today I call myself an alcoholic who is wants to stop drinking. Over the past 20 years that I've been a drinker of alcohol, I have gone home with strangers, had sex in inappropriate locations, talked too much/shared too much and regretted the hell out of it the next day, eaten too much, embarrassed my husband, and passed out. I've also fallen down a flight of stairs and awakened in the ER and been arrested for DUI. My drinking has become more frequent over the years, and I have consumed increasingly larger amounts as the years have passed.
My free time is consumed with drinking and feeling hung over. I think I'm ready to quit, but I've felt this way lots of times over the years. I am going to need help. I mean, drinking hasn't been all bad -- it's given me social opportunities in the form of invitations to cocktail parties, picnics, dinner parties in my suburban community. It's been an escape from the stress of having a child with ADHD/high functioning autism. I'm ready to stop and starting tonight at my stepmother's birthday party, one year after I started back up again.
Thanks for listening!
My free time is consumed with drinking and feeling hung over. I think I'm ready to quit, but I've felt this way lots of times over the years. I am going to need help. I mean, drinking hasn't been all bad -- it's given me social opportunities in the form of invitations to cocktail parties, picnics, dinner parties in my suburban community. It's been an escape from the stress of having a child with ADHD/high functioning autism. I'm ready to stop and starting tonight at my stepmother's birthday party, one year after I started back up again.
Thanks for listening!
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Welcome back. Are you planning any changes besides just not drinking?
I was the master of stopping and re-starting again. It wasn't until I stopped and then made changes that I was able to last more than a few weeks.
I was the master of stopping and re-starting again. It wasn't until I stopped and then made changes that I was able to last more than a few weeks.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Gleefan - It's so good you came back. My behavior was unpredictable every time I picked up too - I never knew where it would take me. It was exhausting and never fun anymore in the end. You don't need it - you can get free and stay that way. 
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Finger Lakes, NY
Posts: 521
Welcome back gleefan! Sounds like we share a LOT! Even our join date. I pretty much did the exact same things you did. Moderating didn't work for me either. I joined SR, thought I was fine and could moderate, felt guilty that I failed everyone at SR and left. In November, after a really bad drunk, I'd finally had enough. I came back to SR, sign up for the Sober 24 Hour Club every day (with very few exceptions) and haven't looked back since. I'm glad you're back....we can do this!
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 3,597
Originally Posted by gleefan 
drinking hasn't been all bad -- it's given me social opportunities in the form of invitations to cocktail parties, picnics, dinner parties in my suburban community.
Thanks for listening!
Thanks for listening!
Welcome back to SR. I also drank to try and manage my stress. It didn't work too well, either.
Still I rise.
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Oh Canada!
Posts: 1,121
Welcome back!
I know you asked another poster as to what changes they made, but I thought I'd offer some up of my own (14 months sober):
Turned down invitations for after work drinks
Avoiding roads that took me past favourite pubs/liquor stores
Drove right home after work
Exercised after work--the time where I would most likely be drinking
Opened up to a a couple of trusted friends who encouraged me and gave me an ear when needed
Logged on here whenever possible -- especially when cravings hit
Ate something when craving alcohol
Changed evening routine: worked out, hot bath, pjs, bed with laptop
Avoided all social events where alcohol would be present
Marked a calendar with X's -- helped me see my progress
Treated myself to beauty products and treatments with the money I normally spent on booze
Avoided stressful situations as much as possible--including talking to some family members
soberrecovery.com soberrecovery.com soberrecovery.com <--huge help!
Best of luck to you. You won't regret it!
I know you asked another poster as to what changes they made, but I thought I'd offer some up of my own (14 months sober):
Turned down invitations for after work drinks
Avoiding roads that took me past favourite pubs/liquor stores
Drove right home after work
Exercised after work--the time where I would most likely be drinking
Opened up to a a couple of trusted friends who encouraged me and gave me an ear when needed
Logged on here whenever possible -- especially when cravings hit
Ate something when craving alcohol
Changed evening routine: worked out, hot bath, pjs, bed with laptop
Avoided all social events where alcohol would be present
Marked a calendar with X's -- helped me see my progress
Treated myself to beauty products and treatments with the money I normally spent on booze
Avoided stressful situations as much as possible--including talking to some family members
soberrecovery.com soberrecovery.com soberrecovery.com <--huge help!
Best of luck to you. You won't regret it!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: everett ma
Posts: 26
Originally Posted by gleefan
I first came to SR a year ago, mid January 2013, because I wanted to stop drinking, after a particularly remorseful morning after. After three weeks I felt confident that I could moderate my drinking, you know, just have one or two, and started back up again the night of my step mother's birthday celebration. That led to another year of heavy drinking, not the moderate drinking I had been aiming for. Over the course of the past year, I watched my behavior, and was amazed that it looked just like the way many of the SR community members described their patterns when they used. A year ago I called myself a heavy drinker who needed to learn to moderate. Today I call myself an alcoholic who is wants to stop drinking. Over the past 20 years that I've been a drinker of alcohol, I have gone home with strangers, had sex in inappropriate locations, talked too much/shared too much and regretted the hell out of it the next day, eaten too much, embarrassed my husband, and passed out. I've also fallen down a flight of stairs and awakened in the ER and been arrested for DUI. My drinking has become more frequent over the years, and I have consumed increasingly larger amounts as the years have passed.
My free time is consumed with drinking and feeling hung over. I think I'm ready to quit, but I've felt this way lots of times over the years. I am going to need help. I mean, drinking hasn't been all bad -- it's given me social opportunities in the form of invitations to cocktail parties, picnics, dinner parties in my suburban community. It's been an escape from the stress of having a child with ADHD/high functioning autism. I'm ready to stop and starting tonight at my stepmother's birthday party, one year after I started back up again.
Thanks for listening!
My free time is consumed with drinking and feeling hung over. I think I'm ready to quit, but I've felt this way lots of times over the years. I am going to need help. I mean, drinking hasn't been all bad -- it's given me social opportunities in the form of invitations to cocktail parties, picnics, dinner parties in my suburban community. It's been an escape from the stress of having a child with ADHD/high functioning autism. I'm ready to stop and starting tonight at my stepmother's birthday party, one year after I started back up again.
Thanks for listening!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
I'm on Day 14 today.
I have been using the 24 hour sign up and the class of February 2014 pages for support.
I have been working on anticipating my triggers and having a plan to replace drinking. I stocked up on snacks and made plans to munch on them at the times Id usually drink.
I was tired for first 10 days. I woke up feeling hung over! I read on the SR boards to expect that in early sobriety. It passed. I was also extremely thirsty throughout the day. I sipped a lot of water and herbal tea and juice. I feel more energized and refreshed now.
Even though I felt drained physically at first, it wasn't complicated by passing out or blacking out and having to shamefully piece back together the previous night. This is a huge relief. I don't miss hangovers, saying too much, black outs, shame and regret, trips to the ER, PD, being in my small town's police blotter.
Sober, I spend more time awake. I am more comfortable driving and running errands - less anxious, fewer panic attacks. I am more patient with my children. I am excited over the things I do because I no longer see them as a chore to endure while I wait to drink, or as getting in the way of drinking.
Last year I "decided to drink moderately" on Day 15. The two glasses of wine I thought I could drink that night turned into a bottle and a half, followed by another year of heavy drinking.
I plan for my triggers but we never know what that AV is going to tell us, or when it's going to sneak up on us. I am not religious, but I find myself begging what ever power is out there to help me stay sober. I didn't get here on my own. I got here because the SR community responded to my messages, agreed that I have a drinking problem that needs help, and offered their advice and support. Thank you!
I have been using the 24 hour sign up and the class of February 2014 pages for support.
I have been working on anticipating my triggers and having a plan to replace drinking. I stocked up on snacks and made plans to munch on them at the times Id usually drink.
I was tired for first 10 days. I woke up feeling hung over! I read on the SR boards to expect that in early sobriety. It passed. I was also extremely thirsty throughout the day. I sipped a lot of water and herbal tea and juice. I feel more energized and refreshed now.
Even though I felt drained physically at first, it wasn't complicated by passing out or blacking out and having to shamefully piece back together the previous night. This is a huge relief. I don't miss hangovers, saying too much, black outs, shame and regret, trips to the ER, PD, being in my small town's police blotter.
Sober, I spend more time awake. I am more comfortable driving and running errands - less anxious, fewer panic attacks. I am more patient with my children. I am excited over the things I do because I no longer see them as a chore to endure while I wait to drink, or as getting in the way of drinking.
Last year I "decided to drink moderately" on Day 15. The two glasses of wine I thought I could drink that night turned into a bottle and a half, followed by another year of heavy drinking.
I plan for my triggers but we never know what that AV is going to tell us, or when it's going to sneak up on us. I am not religious, but I find myself begging what ever power is out there to help me stay sober. I didn't get here on my own. I got here because the SR community responded to my messages, agreed that I have a drinking problem that needs help, and offered their advice and support. Thank you!
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