Jeni26

I was at a funeral on Wednesday. It was a particularly harrowing one.. A little boy from our school ( I work in a special school). He was 9 years old when he died just before the schools went back after the Christmas break. He was a special boy..he had a cheeky grin and the most gorgeous big blue eyes and we all loved him very much. Unable to walk or even sit up unaided, he nevertheless lived his life with a passion. Staff called him 'the dude'. He was an adrenaline junkie...wanting to be raced as fast as possible in his wheelchair, pushed as far into the sea as we could until the waves crashed over his feet, and thrown about in a swimming pool. He wasn't aware of his disabilities, and the people who loved him never saw them either. He was just a typical cheeky little boy to us.

He had been brought up by a foster carer since he was a baby. His natural Mum was there at the funeral...handcuffed to a prison officer and flanked by another. She is serving time for drugs offences. I realised half way through the service that my tears were for her not her little boy. She had never experienced the joy of knowing him as we did. Addiction robbed her of that chance to be his mummy. It robbed her of the dignity she should have had at her baby's funeral. It is such a cruel disease.

I watched the 2 Mums holding each other. They had both lost a son but one had had a lifetime with him, the other just regrets. As a Mum myself I felt her loss so much at that point.

That could have been me. It could have been any of us.

That little boy is free now. I believe that he's somewhere running around and being naughty. I hope so. My prayers since have been for that young Mum. Lost, overwhelmed with grief, and back in prison.

I was so moved by this experience I couldn't speak for a long while afterwards. I just feel so fortunate to have found my way out of the spiral I was in. 2 Mums...they just followed different paths that's all.

KateL

That is so sad xxxx

BradJustBrad

Thanks for sharing that, Jeni. That really hits home.

jdooner

I am moved by your post - I am truly sorry for your loss.

Jeni26

I guess it really was a case of 'there but for the Grace of God...'

And the compassion and love shown to that young Mum was extraordinary too. I didn't hear any judgement or whispering behind hands.

She was viewed as a victim of addiction by the hundreds of people who turned out to say goodby to him. It really was an extremely moving and spiritual day. It left me feeling great sadness for her, but also hope for the human spirit, and gratitude for myself and my situation. I managed to break free...others are not so lucky. X

Mags1

Hi Jeni, heartbreaking, god bless him and his mum. xx

oak

Thanks for posting. It's very touching.