Mountainmanbob

was at an AA meeting years
some guy was sharing and stated something that perturbed me

"if you don't think time (sober time) means anything
try getting some"

yes - I know so they say that we all only have today
but
until we put the plug in the jug and start getting some real time sober
possibly we have not given sobriety an honest start ?

so
if you don't think that time means anything try getting some

MontainmanBob

Gal220

I would agree with this. The quality of my sobriety is definitely strengthened the longer I maintain it. The more times I do the right thing, the easier it becomes. Does that mean I'm immune to relapse? Of course not. In that sense, yes, I could pick up a drink today. But the more time in sobriety that I have, the longer it takes me to get to the point where I might pick up a drink again. My 24 hours sober today is definitely not the same as my first 24 hours sober.

Mountainmanbob

it wasn't until I relapsed twice just weeks before having 3 years sober that
I realized that staying sober and getting my 3 years would have been a big deal to me
and when I finally got back into the Program
as others have mentioned
those first days without a drink
in no way were like the ones yet to come - if I stay sober - yes, time sober means a lot

MountainmanBob

MIRecovery

Past success means a ton to me because I never thought I would be where I am today. That said past performance is not a gaurentee of future sobriety

RobbyRobot

Yeah. A day sober today is beyond words better than my first few days, few weeks, few months, lol. As the time and seasons go by, time in really does give opportunities to tweak what is needed to be all that we can be in our sober lifestyles. The whole is way more then the individual days counted. Time served honestly and with purpose gives back more then it takes to maintain. It really does get easier, lol.

LifeWorthLiving

I'm on day 5 and it feels like no time at all. I feel like I have this looooong road stretched out years ahead of me then I remember to take it one day at a time.

I have an app on my phone that tracks days for whatever you want. I set it to It has been 'x' days since I drank any alcohol. I've had that app over a year with the same intent every time and right now it says 5.

I once got it to 17. Thats it. This year was so full of alcohol it makes me sick to think back on it.

I cant even imagine it saying 30 or 60, 90, 120, 365 days!!!

I can reset it to whatever I want but I'd just be lying to myself. This time is different and dammit if New Years Eve isnt coming up.

I'd rather just stay in but have friends that want to go out. I'm going to claim myself designated driver and see how it feels. If its too much I'm going to tell them I have to go home. I dont know what I'm going to do actually I just know I cant put that liquid syrup up to my lips. I cant I just cant!!!!

DarkDays

I have the app on my iphone , today it says day 706, remember like yesterday that early days and looking at it go up another day in amazement

It really dies get better the further you go into sobriety .

Mountainmanbob

good luck to you LWL

my goal many times was to get more time than the last time
I knew I could do it - did it before
so it's the time that I had before plus one day

maybe for now shoot for 18 days ??
if and when you get there
I guarantee you will have a great feeling of accomplishment

MountainmanBob

Boleo

IMO experience is a lot more valuable than time. Why?

First - Results come from experience, not calendar days spent not drinking. Technically not-drinking is a form of inexperience just as not-working does not count as job experience.

Second - Results serve as a motivator to continue working my program. Without results, I will grow complacent and start resting on my laurels.

Third - It is my "experience" that I pass along to new comers, not my token chip. Time alone does not give me the wisdom I need to articulate how it works. Not to mention, seeing new comers get results is a grand experience in itself.

Recovery works like a cybernetic feedback system. We must put some of what we get back in to keep the process flowing.

mick3580

Ditto.

Turninganewleaf

I use to attend AA and make many meetings. Time does not mean much to me because I know and experienced people in the program who lie about their sobriety. I'm not talking about being a dry drunk but who are occassionaly still drinking or smoking reefers and still claim xx number of years.

GracieLou

What other people do is none of my affair. The only thing I need to concern myself with is myself and my recovery.

As many find out after attending AA meetings is that not everybody is working the AA program. The only requirement for membership is the desire to stop drinking, that does not mean they have actually stopped drinking.

"Time" would make a great topic for a discussion meeting. 30 days seems like a very long time. The time it takes to write out the fourth step seems like very very long time and the time it takes it complete the fifth step can seem like a eons.

I think every step of recovery takes time and it takes what it takes. There is no magic number. Wherever we are on our journey, that is right where we are supposed to be. I think that goes for experience as well.

I will experience what I am supposed to when I am supposed to. God will never give me more then I can handle. I may have experienced something at six months that someone that has six years may not have and maybe never will.

Then there is also how we handle experiences. How I react to something can and will be different to how someone else will react.

We may be on the same path or journey but my road is going to have forks in the road that differ than someone else's. That does not make me or them any better or worse. Just an individual.

diffingo911

I Believe the "Time" Factor is very important. In the few months of abstinence the fog starts to lift, diet/hygiene/housework-basically self care has a higher priority.

The Physical damage starts to heal-What I've done to my brains, body and organs on and off for all these years will not heal overnight. My Mind and Spirit's development and learning has been stagnated by the affects of alcohol and perhaps I may NEVER "Catch-Up", so to speak, to where I might have been otherwise.

I have seen from others, that this is a Process which can take quite some time to manifest itself.

I've also seen how going back to the drink after awhile can make things even WORSE than before. Some say "Back to Square One", but when this happens, it's more like back to square minus 1 for many.

The longer I am away from that "last drink", the less I may think about it- the more of a chance I have to finally GROW, with a "Sober" life experience that I could actually REMEMBER and Draw from; Like Learning from my mistakes for a change-Or having some real relationships-Or to Actually give a Sh** in a general way.

I expect that it would be just like the expression-about the importance being the JOURNEY and not the DESTINATION-And that journey will last the rest of my life-
Not overnight...

diffingo911

PS...just what I'd expect from Sobriety...Not like I'm living it yet-YET

al

diffingo911

PPS-Only 37 hours so far-This time...

Mountainmanbob

we are talking about time
and
37 hours is great
seems all times in sobriety play an important part
if we don't get through the beginning of being sober
we will never see the middle or the end sober

MB

Grungehead

It's quite the paradox actually. Without sober time you can't learn to live sober, and if you don't learn to live sober you will most likely never accumulate much time sober. I found that early on in sobriety accumulating sober days was important to me. It bought me time to change my way of thinking and start living a full life without alcohol. Once I could achieve that, the quality of my sobriety became more important than the quantity. Once I found a way to live a happy and contented life without drinking the quantity of sober days add up without much thought. I still celebrate milestones, but if I am happy, joyous and free today then it really doesn't matter if I have 8 months or 8 years.

jazzfish

I was roundly criticized for saying that time sober had any correlation with successful sobriety. Apparently, it was not the PC opinion to have. I still believe it is a good proxy - otherwise, someone who relapses every month can have "better" sobriety than a person who is continuously sober for years. I suppose it can depend on what your goal is.

Dee74

I'm not sure about PC or not Jazzfish but it's usually pretty clear to me (and I think to others too) what kind of recovery someone has...it's all about walking the walk, not simply talking the talk...

it's not always correlated to a long sober time - sometimes they might only have a matter of months, or sometimes many years.

D

Joe Nerv

Time however offers me experience I can only gain, through time. What was once blind faith has become a certainty, only because I trusted and allowed enough time to pass for things to come to fruition. While that can happen in a short time, and I realize it's the experience I'm referring to, many times it took years.

Time also gives me a different understanding of how the steps work in my life. Steps six and seven had some immediate results, but the biggest benefits happened over time. I am a so completely different person than I was 29 years ago, and I know that that change came about due to my application of the steps. This experience I couldn't speak of at 6 months sober, 2 years sober, or even 20 years sober. Some things have taken much longer to materialize or be transformed.

I have a lot of thought regarding time, and planned to start a thread on myself when I had enough 'time' to write without being interrupted. That time is not now, as I'm sitting in my work cafeteria and people are stopping to wish me happy holidays. I need to be in the moment for a portion of this day, so I'm outta here for now .... Happy holidays to all those who celebrate.