Addict/Alcoholic Back From Lapse: Issues Dealing With a Family That Drinks
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Join Date: Aug 2013
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Addict/Alcoholic Back From Lapse: Issues Dealing With a Family That Drinks
I have finally decided to write a thread voicing tough, common issues that seem to run through many years of my life. I am an alcoholic/addict; I have decided to clean up many-a times in the past 5 years. I have gone a year clean, I have done over 150 days...just recently, I have lapsed from about 120 days clean and sober.
My issues can be written as thus: My family does not really believe that alcoholism is real. My wife's family are all binge drinkers. My brother-in-law is a binge drinker.....I am the only one who wants to stop, and seems to struggle with the "stopping." This is, of course, because I am the only one who sees my drinking/drug use as a problem that I can't control. Everyone else is content with their lives as they are. My wife wants, and supports my sobriety. However, when it comes time for us to get together with her drinking family, in their drinking environment, there has, in times of my sobriety, been a dividing wall between myself, my wife, and her family. I have attempted to guard myself against temptation, being as I have always been in "early sobreity" (1 year, or less). I feel like am nuts sometimes. I've gone to AA, done it wholeheartedly, gotten a sponsor, worked the steps....but in the end, I just don't buy the program. Not for me.
To sum up: I am the only one in my family who knows how hard sobriety is, I am the only one who realizes that there is alcoholism running around...I am the only one who cares to try to stay sober. Yet, the situation leads me back to lapse, or relapse every time, 5 years running.
Any advice is welcomed. Thank you, in advance.
My issues can be written as thus: My family does not really believe that alcoholism is real. My wife's family are all binge drinkers. My brother-in-law is a binge drinker.....I am the only one who wants to stop, and seems to struggle with the "stopping." This is, of course, because I am the only one who sees my drinking/drug use as a problem that I can't control. Everyone else is content with their lives as they are. My wife wants, and supports my sobriety. However, when it comes time for us to get together with her drinking family, in their drinking environment, there has, in times of my sobriety, been a dividing wall between myself, my wife, and her family. I have attempted to guard myself against temptation, being as I have always been in "early sobreity" (1 year, or less). I feel like am nuts sometimes. I've gone to AA, done it wholeheartedly, gotten a sponsor, worked the steps....but in the end, I just don't buy the program. Not for me.
To sum up: I am the only one in my family who knows how hard sobriety is, I am the only one who realizes that there is alcoholism running around...I am the only one who cares to try to stay sober. Yet, the situation leads me back to lapse, or relapse every time, 5 years running.
Any advice is welcomed. Thank you, in advance.
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Toronto,Ontario
Posts: 1,027
Yes, stop spending time with them.
Do what is best for YOU, your wife should be supporting this decision.
Otherwise, you are certainly setting up yourself for failure.
Need to change people, places and situations that contributed to your drinking.
Try another recovery program, surround yourself with people who are also getting better.
Do what is best for YOU, your wife should be supporting this decision.
Otherwise, you are certainly setting up yourself for failure.
Need to change people, places and situations that contributed to your drinking.
Try another recovery program, surround yourself with people who are also getting better.
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