kinzoku

I was here before, I failed. This week I missed two days of work because of my drinking. This is where I have to draw the line. I'm young, healthy, and just got a great new job. I have to stop this before life comes crashing down around me.

I need help, I realize that.

I want to post here to make myself accountable to somebody, anybody.

MaidenNZ

Hi Kinzoku. Feel free to come into the chat room. you will find a lot of support there. Most of us have tried and failed more times than we would like to remember when it comes to stopping drinking. A lot of us HAVE managed to kick the drink though with the use of various tools and the ongoing support we've found in the chat room.

Hold on to what's real Kinzoku. The drink will fill you with a false sense of security, pump you up so you feel like superman for a night, then rip your life out from under your feet in the blink of an eye.

Hope we see you around Kinzoku

Be well

StevenT

I've been there. I got a job working at a ford dealership, everything was great. Got fired due to being unreliable and having questionable behavior. Got rehired, same job, half a year later. Got fired again, same reason.

It's been my habit to sabotage myself because drinking and smoking pot was more important to me then anything else.

Keep coming back on here. Make it a habit. Doesn't matter if you don't post, I don't always post. But I'm on every night after work. I go to AA meetings, I work with others and I have a commitment on saturday nights.

Establish a new pattern and follow that pattern, to the best of your ability, one day at a time. If you still can't go without drinking, do more. Commit to more. Try a program that offers help and has results, such as AA or AVRT or another of the programs. AA worked for me, and it's what I recommend, but I won't ignore results either. There is a way, just gotta find the way that will work for you.

I'll see you back here soon.

IOAA2

Hi and welcome back. Whether you choose AA or another form of rehabing The #1 personality needed is being honest with your self about YOUR drinking. Part of that is being accountable to yourself. With many of us after a day or two we start our AV thinking " It wasn't that bad and other rubbish." If your here it was and probably worse so accept what you can't change and stop ASAP for YOURSELF. BE WELL

TrixMixer

Hi KZK,

Funny I was just reading your post from June and wanted to see how you were doing and TODAY you decide to post again. When we don't here from someone we know you can get lost again out there, So you relapsed, but managed to get a great new job. Now that job is in jeopardy because of your old friend, alcohol, also being back in your life.

Did you ever feel the Universe was talking to you? I think you did that is why you have come back to us. We are here and we will be your accountability, but you have to put the drink down today and NEVER bring it back in your life. Ya know sometimes we only get 1 real chance at sobriety out of the many attempts. It is normal to relapse, but do not throw away THIS opportunity to get sober. This just might be the 1 chance that will work.

Do NOT think of not drinking any further out than ONE DAY. Take each day as a single challange. If you do it this way you will find yourself on day 20 and alcohol will become a distant memory. Yes you have to fight to be sober EVERDAY of your life--yeah we are one of those lucky SOB who cannot be in the same room as alcohol.

That's ok, and one day when you are living sober you will realize how you actually wete one of the lucky ones to have experience the dregs of despair and have lifted yourself out of them. Life becomes very special and you will appreciate everyday you live once you throw out the alcohol.

Please do it now before your chance may get away!

Come back everyday and let us know what your thinking. We will not let you down. Someone is always here to help.

Sincerley,
TrixMioxer

kinzoku

Two and a half weeks, and then, nearly every single day for a month. And now I'm back here, realizing its time to try again. How can I become the master of myself?

JTBIV

kinzoku, if you're like me, and it sounds like you might be, you're not ready to tell any of your friends and family about your drinking. This place can help. It's funny how a bunch of people you don't even know on a message board can hold you accountable.

Nevertheless

You have to go to war. Sobriety has to be the #1 priority. You have to be relentless. You have to make sacrifices.
As you win battles it does get easier. But you can't let your guard down,because as soon as you do you will be attacked.
Wars are very difficult to fight by yourself. AA helped me to get the monkey off of my back. It truly is the most economical way to get reinforcements for the battles ahead. Of course there are other ways to get allies But as I said AA is usually the most economical and also the most convenient.
This isn't a game,it is serious stuff. It is your life. You only get one shot. Kick ass and take names.
I wish you the best.
Fred

kinzoku

Day two and I'm jonesing. Thanks for the support

Pipefish

Often, it's me trying to be master of myself that causes the problem! Often too, I just need to get out of the way, and do something entirely different than my default responses; isolation, solving 'it' (whatever 'it' happens to be currently) all by myself. The power of just talking honestly to another person, another AA if that's your route (it is mine) is incredible. We're not alone anymore, and for me, it was after a lifetime of feeling I was entirely alone.

It's great that you're on here sharing this, keep going, you're not alone. My experience is that the times I stop sharing as honestly as I need to, to say exactly what's going on, are the most precarious - whether that's in the impact on my emotional or spiritual well-being, or worst of all in picking up a drink. It doesn't need to be that way

If you are an AA person, I found the Living Sober book a good way to go, whatever stage of sobriety you're at, and I am someone who really does need to keep this simple, and focus on basic stuff. Am a huge fan of the just for today card too, which also reminds me that, this is just for today. It says so! "I can do something for 12 hours that would appall me if I felt I had to keep it up for a lifetime" Today, I continue to find that so, so helpful, particularly in times of stress, negotiating situations I find trying

Remember from a stint in rehab years ago, when I was in a fluster about 101 things, none of which were easily or immediately resolvable! The advice I received was to just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Have always remembered it, as being one of the best and most simple gifts anyone ever gave me, and whatever has been happening in life and recovery,that thought worked. All I've got to do...just keep putting one foot in front of the other, and stay close to other recovering people

Best of luck to you, hang in there

Pipefish

Oh, and the other thing I meant to say! You haven't failed, you've done what it is that we do...we drink! That's my default setting, and learning how not to, takes time.

But most of all, you haven't failed because you're here

Hang in there