BackToSquareOne

In your sober journey has your need to be right gone down, up or stayed the same? I think mine has gone down some but I'm still working on it. I'm finding a big difference between having an opinion and needing to be right. Looking at all sides of a thing does give me more insight. Any Thoughts?

IOAA2

I still have difficulty with this one, perhaps not as bad as when I was drinking but still there. I have personal values and will pursue them too far sometimes. If someone says they will do something, be there, etc. I expect it to happen within reason. In arguments a friend often says to consider "maybe he's/she's correct." which sometimes helps.
BE WELL

mick3580

I still need to be right a lot. It used to be real bad because I didn't just need to be right; I needed you to know I was right! Progress.

Music

I had to decide whether I wanted to be right, or happy!

Threshold

I used to be extremely uncomfortable with "I don't know".

IN early recovery I made a concentrated effort to admit to myself that a lot of time I didn't know, and when someone was speaking about a thing I didn't know about, to say "I don't know."

It was incredibly freeing. I used to think I HAD to know, not just for a sense of pride, but for a sense of security. It terrified me to not know. WHen I was able to admit that in the scope of reality I pretty much didn't know...well anything...yet the Universe didn't fall apart, I was able to be OK with "I don't know"

And it was hugely freeing to take the next step of admitting and accepting that I don't know what anyone else should be doing, and I can't read minds or hearts and my intuition is rather limited.

All that freed me up to experience my relationship with me and my HP. There are things there I don't know, but there are things there I DO know. But I still tend to seek second, third, and fourth opinions and approvals. I want other people to tell me I am right. But hey, if I don't know what is right for them, how the heck would they know what is right for me?

Now I am working on letting go of the compulsive need for validation from the outside.

Doesn't mean I don't seek and respect the input of certain people, but I am trying to break the habit of vomiting all my thoughts and feelings up and having someone else validate them. I'm way far from this.

And in my own mind I still want it validated that I am right in my opinion of others, even if I don't try to tell them what is what, my mind is judging them a mile a minute. and I want someone else to judge them too so I can have the satisfaction of being "right".

All this stems from inner insecurity.