When does the anxiety and regret get better?
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by LadyBug66 
I just keep reliving the stupid and embarrassing things I have done when drunk. When will that get better? My mind won't shut off!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Washington
Posts: 879
As you get & stay sober Ladybug those feelings will fade & you will feel better. I have over 2 years & I am still ashamed of some of my behaviors. It gets better tho. Only time and active recovery helps.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 332
LadyBug,
It does get better with time. My first month of sobriety was pretty bad as far as the guilt and regrets, even anxiety. Time, and focusing on things other than my thoughts has helped a lot. When did you quit?
June
It does get better with time. My first month of sobriety was pretty bad as far as the guilt and regrets, even anxiety. Time, and focusing on things other than my thoughts has helped a lot. When did you quit?
June
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,949
I don't know Lady. I suffer from that too. I know sometimes i can see the forest for the trees...or however the saying goes. As you know your hardest critic is yourself and I think it just has to be that way for a while. If you find a quick cure please let me know!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,949
Originally Posted by LadyBug66
I've quit before but this time I really feel like I'm done. I can't keep living with regrets its eating me alive.
Lady..take a deep breath. you are just stuck in your mind right now. You and I both know that doesn't last forever. there is a way out. You have to believe that
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Wales UK
Posts: 859
Sometime you've just got to stay stopped and let time and distance let things move on but if you carry on drinking its going to follow you and it'll never be far away.
Time to make each day count everyday.
Love John.
Time to make each day count everyday.
Love John.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
regrets an interesting thing. You regret stuff that happened in your past it makes you feel crummy today and in reality there is nothing you can even do about it so why even worry about it? I heard a preacher once he said look at life as if its a tv and it has 3 channels. you got the past, the present, and the future. He said if you tune into the past theres regret i shoulda this I shoulda that I wish this would have turned out differently. If you tune in the future theres worry what if i dont save enough for retirement what if i cant pay for my kids education what if the car breaks down on tuesday etc.. If you tune in to the the present theres also plenty of stuff to concern yourself with time to make lunch time to get to work time hit the store dont forget this or that while i'm there etc.. But you cannot focus on all 3 channels its just too much.
Your best bet is to focus on today the present and just leave it at that. Let tommorrow worry about tommorrow. yesturday is done and gone whats done is done nothing you can do about it just leave it there and move forward through today.
You got enough trouble right here right now and enough struggles right here right now to worry about no sense in adding to that thinking about what coulda been or what might be.
hang in there it does get easier.
Your best bet is to focus on today the present and just leave it at that. Let tommorrow worry about tommorrow. yesturday is done and gone whats done is done nothing you can do about it just leave it there and move forward through today.
You got enough trouble right here right now and enough struggles right here right now to worry about no sense in adding to that thinking about what coulda been or what might be.
hang in there it does get easier.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 332
LadyBug,
The regrets and the shame are what brought me here, so I understand...they got worse and worse with time, so like you, I decided not to feel that anymore. I'm about two months out now and I can honestly say that a lot of those feelings are gone. I can feel proud in the morning when I wake up because I don't have to worry about something stupid I said or did the night before. Or worse, something stupid I said or did that I can't remember! Please stay with this so you can feel the peace that comes with sobriety.
June
The regrets and the shame are what brought me here, so I understand...they got worse and worse with time, so like you, I decided not to feel that anymore. I'm about two months out now and I can honestly say that a lot of those feelings are gone. I can feel proud in the morning when I wake up because I don't have to worry about something stupid I said or did the night before. Or worse, something stupid I said or did that I can't remember! Please stay with this so you can feel the peace that comes with sobriety.
June
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Scandinavia
Posts: 1,344
Some Buddhist wise guy said once to me “what is more important to look for the bus you missed or the one you are going to catch”. He was being rather smart with that phrase, but he was also right.
How are you experiencing this are these memories returning to you frequently for days or weeks?
How are you experiencing this are these memories returning to you frequently for days or weeks?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Southeast USA
Posts: 175
I'm with you! Enough is enough! I have reached a place that I know I will stay sober. This time 4 sure!
Originally Posted by LadyBug66
I've quit before but this time I really feel like I'm done. I can't keep living with regrets its eating me alive.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by whiskeyman
I am an AA guy.
do a step four and five and those things go away. All mine did.
do a step four and five and those things go away. All mine did.
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