Ironman9292

I quit drinking a week ago today after roughly 6 years of more than heavy drinking and am looking for support. No one that is close to me really understands alcoholism or if they do they wont admit it so its like im totally alone in this. Any suggestions on how to keep my mind occupied??

PhaseTwo

Well if there are any hobbies you've been thinking of starting nows a good time to pick them up. Exercise really helps me. You could go to meetings. Get out of the house and find stuff to do around town that you know won't have alcohol around if you're feeling up to it.

EndGameNYC

When you come right down it, mediation is often focusing on a single mundane task so that the rest of your mind can rest.

No earth-shattering news here, but something you might consider. Taking on new projects early in sobriety helps some but hurts others.

zjw

I read a lot at that point and drank a lot of herbal teas. I found odd chores to do and little projects to get into and occupy myself even if they where stupid they kept me busy.

Ironman9292

I have tried a few things such as reading, drawing, household projects, etc.. My ironwork and metal art is my best bet, however there weren't many sober days when I was doing it full time for a living. I even drank at work most days. I guess in all reality I need to learn how to function on a daily basis without drinking. It was such a huge part of my life for so long that I rarely did anything that didn't involve it. Its almost like I need to learn how to live everyday life again without the sauce and the thought of how to do this is beyond confusing...

artsoul

Congratulations on getting sober and welcome to SR!

I had a lot of the same feelings when I first got sober, like I didn't know what to do with myself. I came here a lot - it made me feel better to know that others were going through the same thing and that it would get better.

One thing that was really helpful was taking things in small chunks, baby steps. When I couldn't think about staying sober for a week or even a whole day, I'd just focus on staying sober for an hour and figure out what I could do for that hour (watch TV, eat, wash the car, whatever it took.....). It seemed to be easier that way, at least for me.

The mental obsession does fade..... it just takes time. Hang in there!

Ironman9292

hey thanks! that makes total sense! I have had huge goals in the past and failed to meet them mainly from taking to much on at once.. I guess this is no different and I can break it down into smaller pieces if needed such as daily or even hourly goals like you mentioned. I know it will take time, I didn't get like this over night...

BarbieKen

I attend AA meetings, I was a drinker who isolated. I just LOVE being out in the world everyday with people who share in my disease, and help me in my Recovery, just by coming to the meeting. It's very comfortable to go to a place where you are understood, you're not judged. :-D Bobbi

gigi0310

That is so awesome. Reading help me initially and then meetings. I was so reluctant to admit it and there are plenty of meetings and groups I like. However, personal choice is key. It's all you. I struggle but still come back and work on it.

good luck..30 days is an awesome goal! 1 week is a great step

gigi

DrakeCKC

Welcome to SR! My best advice is to keep busy and look to the wonderful people here on SR who have helped me attain 4 mos sober. I drank at my work too, I work at home and the booze kept coming earlier and earlier in the day.

SR has online AA style meetings at 8 on Tues and Fri which are good if face to face AA meetings are intimidating or inconvenient for you.

Congrats on a week, that is a big step!

Peach2013

Once, when I was faced with some seemingly hopeless tasks involving my family, my brother looked at me and asked,"How do you eat an elephant?" Needless to say, I had NO idea what he was talking about! "I give up, " I replied. "How do you eat an elephant?"
He smiled and said, "One bite at a time, one bite at a time." Ironman, you can do this. One little "bite" at a time. If all else fails, when I want to drink just because I'm so used to doing it? I take the easy way out and go get in the bed and go to sleep. When I wake up, at least I'm not drunk lol. Peach

zjw

When I quit i felt like my best friend had died or that I had lost my left arm. I did not drink while trying to accomplish things however as I new I wouldnt get stuff done if i was drinking.

it was like learning to walk all over again. I'm envious of your iron working thats pretty cool stuff. Or at least from my point of view it sounds cool!

It gets easier the whole keeping yourself occupied aspect in the begining isnt too bad then you seem to move on to other phases. In my case I'll still make a cup of tea now and then and think about my early days of recovery It'll bring tears to my eyes too recalling how tough it was.

bloss

Thanks for sharing and glad you are here, some days I just focus on small things, simple activities, a book, a movie, just a walk. Nice to be sober and enjoy the simple things of life. Take care
Bloss

soberjill

I find myself thinking about it a lot, and then thinking about what someone else on SR wrote...(apologies to the owner of this one for not remembering who to give credit)...I NEVER want to do Day One again. And I'm proud that I'm on Day Seven today!! Like, SO proud. Like, even when I get all rammy and it's in my head and I don't think I can think of anything else - I wait a minute. And then I get past it.

You can do this, Ironman. We ALL can.

Elisabeth888

Welcome! I attend AA meetings in addition to posting here. I find the face to face support invaluable.

Isaiah

Hello!

I've found SR pretty useful for connecting with people who're going through the same experience. I find AA a little more useful, it just feels more, I guess, "real" to hear it from someone who is physically present.

Personally, I just fill my down-time with any small project I enjoy. If I can't focus on a book or a piece of writing, I'll just clean or work on the yard. Boredom is harder to bear sometimes without being drunk, but suffering through boredom is not half or a fraction as bad as what I suffered drinking.

Whoever said to just focus on occupying small chunks of time gave good advice. No need to plan out your entire week. If all you can do is stay busy for one hour I find it's usually enough to keep my mind focused and not drunk-dreaming.

Ironman9292

Thanks to all for the words of encouragement and Peach that made me lol a bit. I have heard that before but it was about something totally different! Either way it seems to hold true to this as well! I thought I was doing a decent job of dealing with things until last night when I had a run in with insomnia and anxiety. lol Its day 8 now and the drained energy feeling from fighting my mind all night is still way better than the hangover that I would normally be suffering from. Im just saying!!

karate

Hang in there , being drunk , depressed , drunk , anxeity , drunk , angry , drunk, ashamed

See the trend here ?

zjw

karate is right you remove the Drunk part and the pattern starts to change for you.

zjw

I used to think people who had sobered up where full of it. and had somehow fooled themselves that life was somehow better without booze. In my head it was like wow good for them they finally brainwashed themselves enough to think life is so great without booze idiots i'd think what do they know.

that line of thought made it soo hard for me that first 6 months to a year. I felt i was wasting my time trying to sober up and be happy. But I kept with it. 2 years later I realize they where not full of it. maybe they did brainwash themselves I dunno but they are happier and so am I so apparently being sober works and thinks do get better and life aint so bad.