steve-in-kville

.... find out you sobered up?

And what was their reaction? Were they supportive?

lilyrosemary

I told those near and dear to me. Those that I felt close to and I knew cared about me including my closest drinking friends. Then I went into treatment. I also told my pastor and he relayed it to my church family for prayers etc. I guess I was pretty open about it. The truth will set you free : ) best wishes!

Jfanagle

I quit telling them the same things two or three times. I was on time to family gatherings and social functions and spoke in coherent sentences. I started showing an interest in people other than myself and wasn't always trying to prove that my point of view was the "right" one!!

IT DIDN'T TAKE ROCKET SCIENTISTS TO SEE I HAD QUIT DRINKING

Everyone around me loved the change and as time went on a few people were relieved to find out that I had just been drunk all that time and in fact I wasn't terminally stupid.

Friends and family have been nothing but supportive and in turn I have tried to express by way of actions and deeds just how appreciative I am of all of them. It has been a win-win for everyone.

Beat wishes to you,

Jon

steve-in-kville

I laughed at that one, but I know what you mean!

Hope4Life

I told my close friends when I had been sober for about 1 month. They were and still are very supportive and have been so kind as to tell me how much better I look and how much more focused and happy with life I am now.

I did have one so called 'friend' who started laughing and said "well, we need to go on a camping trip and drink some beers!"... we are no longer friends.

As far as my family goes, unfortunately they are all gone now..... but I know that my Mom is watching over me and very proud of her only son conquering his biggest problem.

If anyone gives you a hard time, I would take a look at that friendship and try to determine if that person is a 'TRUE' friend. Remember, misery loves company and that goes for alcoholics. Some people might feel threatened by your efforts towards sobriety.

tomsteve

my cose friends? well, they were the ones that drank like I did. haven't spoken to any of em since I got into recovery. found out they weren't friends

my family? told them I was finally doin something about my drinkin and the reaction was pretty much the same;"yeah...right."

I had to prove through my actions I meant business and that took T.I.M.E.

zjw

I never told anyone. One good friend was along for the ride so he new. I mentioned it to my mother. My father has no idea. I mean he knows i dont drink But he doesnt have any clue the magnitude of the issue.

I mentioned it to my wifes sister and told her to please please not tell the family it was personal and private not something i wanted aired. Well she ran her mouth and then my wife ran hers. So now its wide out int he open in that family that I'm an alcoholic etc.. everyone all in my business. I'm still pretty angry about it. I like to keep certain things close.

You would however think its a big deal since I have my sobriety date tattooed on my wrist and when asked I will tell people what it means but not much more. But my father however hates tattoos is pissed i got them and refuses to bring them up in conversation or ask about them.

EndGameNYC

Had very few friends left at the end since most of those people were just drinking buddies. Have made genuine friendships in recovery. Let my family know as soon as I acted on getting sober. They rarely saw me drinking or drunk since I was sober for twenty five years, most of my adult life, before I relapsed. All of them cut me off when they knew I was drinking again, but were and have remained extremely supportive in my efforts to stay sober.

Perhaps the most difficult thing for me was facing up to all the bridges I burned professionally. It's been a long, hard slog, but I gradually was able to get back on my feet again in this regard.

Generally, most people were happy to know I was no longer killing myself with booze.

Warhawk

70 days sober tomorrow. Really haven't told many people. When asked about drinking, I simply reply, "I don't drink." And leave it at that.
Not sure what the proper protocol is in announcing your sobriety.

bigsombrero

I did the same. Maybe it was because I went into treatment like lilyrosemary did, we were "going away" and were faced with either lying about it, or coming clean. When you get to that point, you come clean. It was hard because everyone knew about it - but in the end this is my life and quite frankly I'm glad it worked out this way for me.

Some of my friends were real supportive, others not so much. You have to remember that your friends have no training in how to handle a recovering addict - they are clueless! I also had problems working through the new boundaries, I often felt that some friends were too harsh, others too nice. It's a process.

Either way I am happier I started telling the truth, it was important to me to start going down that path.

gravity

People in my work life told my uncles how bad my drinking was getting and that they were concerned about me. Bottom line is you can't hide your problem, not for very long anyway.

People were sceptical of course when I told them I was quitting for good but I think 5 1/2 years of sobriety shows how serious I am this time.

Ampsmarie

I told my family and friends/ "friends"... those who were supportive were my family and true friends. I lost one or two "friends" because I am no longer that party chick. I have so much love and support from my family. But honestly the one person I needed to be honest with was myself, then I felt free.

BarbieKen

My husband let my parents and our close friends know that I had volunteered to go into de-tox, then into Rehab. I truly felt their love, and continue to feel it. I came home to sobriety. As I 've written here on the board. I've made new friends in my 12 Step Meetings. No shame here, I'm very happy today. :-D

Isaiah

My family regrettably has not been able to see me in person in my new length of sobriety, I'm across the country now.

Over the phone they tell me I sound like I'm "doing better," which I interpret as a remark on my sobriety and improved mental health. I read between the words.

Looking forward to getting a visit in about a month from my mom. I really want to let her see how she's got her son back.

MattM316

From experience I think it's best not to tell anyone, because they can make an issue out of it and even make it worse for you.

I remember a few years ago (all before I ended up in hospital) I was all set to quit completely. I was getting tired of it and was done with it.
So i'd told my girlfriend at the time, she was happy with that etc.
Then I started reading up about withdrawal and how it was very dangerous to go cold turkey.
So I said to her "look, slight change of plan, I need to do this the right way and gradually taper down", I gave her website links etc.
And her reaction was basically "I knew you wouldn't do it, you're a p*s*y, that stuff is a load of rubbish".

Well, that pretty much killed my sober plans and I drank even more than before, about 8 months later (after we'd split up) I was in hospital after three seizures.
I wouldn't say that I blame her as such (ok maybe a little bit!) because I'd have probably ended up there anyway, but you never know.

Grungehead

Everyone I care about or cares about me knows. I've quit for long stretches before and this last "bender" (8 years) everyone that cares about me is just glad I survived to get sober again. I will be embarking on my 9th step soon so there are some people who don't know I'm sober yet that will be finding out in the near future.

gigi123

Never told my family at all. There was/is no drinking in my family, so nobody knew I drank. I live several states away from my family, and was a solo drinker who turned off the computer and phone while drinking.

They never knew I drank, so why should they know I stopped. It's my fight not theirs. If I was close to them emotionally and geographically, I suppose I'd have a different stance.

bigsombrero

One of the good parts about telling people, for me: now I had some accountability. It's like telling your family and friends that you've signed up to run a marathon, or promising someone you're getting them a really nice gift. Then...when the chips are down, you say "dang, I should still really do this" - it gave me extra motivation. I was getting clean first for myself, but making and keeping promises was something I needed to get better at anyway.