melivinsober

I told my grandparents that I was an alcoholic. I followed up with "and I'm 29 days sober."

30 today!

But I can't believe I did that. They are SUPER religious and I've been ashamed of my drinking. They asked me "what's new?" and I just told them.

It felt really good. They were really supportive, since our family is full of alcoholics. And a look of "OHHH! That makes sense!" washed over their faces. I don't think I fully realized, or even realize now, how much my drinking effected other people.

I'm having work issues too. My mom suggested that my alcoholism was effecting work too. I got defensive and told her that I NEVER drank before or during work. But then she explained that it doesn't mean that my performance wasn't down because of a weekend binge due to a hangover or even still having a blood alcohol level from the night before. ... Didn't think about that one. :/

I have a meeting with my boss today about new "arrangements." I think I'm being fired. I found a spreadsheet of March's schedule and I wasn't on it. This was a week ago Monday and all of my higher-ups are stuttering and stammering and clearly don't know what to say or do... So I'm pretty sure this is it. I can't wait to find out, no matter what the outcome is. The anxiety is KILLING me! I've been battling extreme urges ALL week. I made it through. And I'll make it through another week.

lilyrosemary

congratulations on your sobriety and for having the courage to tell someone you love the truth, even though it's uncomfortable. we don't have to shield the ones we love from the truth about ourselves. it's liberating, yes? my family has a tendency to bury certain things from my elderly mom...unpleasant things. But when i decided to go into treatment, i just went and told her straight up...i am going away for a month, to rehab, cuz i drink too much. felt great! we shouldnt be embarrassed about bettering ourselves right? i wish you the best and as far as your job goes...if you are let go, you have the chance to start somewhere new...with a clean slate! God bless and best wishes!

Lionne

Congrats on 30 days!
You can do this. No matter what happens with your job situation, you found two supportive people in your grandparents and you are making the right choices to stay sober and have a better life. I hope the meeting with your boss turns out ok. Whatever happens, you will be able to handle the situation far better sober. Best wishes and good luck,
L.

paul99

Your mother is bang on. Alcoholism at work is not necessarily about being drunk at work. It's about are you being 100% effective when at work? Are you mentally present there, or are you distracted by thoughts of alcohol? Are you ineffective because of hangovers or withdrawals? Are you calling in sick because you are afraid others might smell last night's booze on you? Are others picking up the slack because of ineffectiveness? These are the things I thought of myself in my situation...and realized that my work was hugely affected.

But great on telling your grandparents and the 30 days. Support is so important especially when we first get sober.

Good luck!

Fernaceman

You are correct, Paul. When I ask myself those questions an relate it to my active drinking days, my work was hugely affected, too.

TiredWolf

Melvin,

I've been there, blown through jobs like a box of Kleenex at one point due to drugs and alcohol.

Some advice...if they do let you go, sit there and look them in the eyes and go through it with dignity. Tell them you don't blame them and you're surprised it took 'em so long to do it. It will blow their little minds.

Then walk out tall with a straight face and don't look back. You'll find new job and make a fresh start and forge new connections and opportunities.

pluginjug

Yeah, it's amazing how many people we believe we're fooling about our alcoholism, but they know full well.

I echo TiredWolf, take the job loss with dignity and be cool about it. Now that you're sober, it's a fresh start for you all around.

instant

Stay with Melvin. Having my sobriety unconditional (sober no matter what) really helped me. If it turns out you are laid off, it is a bad idea to deal with it by drinking.

I am older than you. Our brains getting over repeated posionings des take time. I suspect the older you are and the longer you have been drinking the longer ot takes.

Bless your Mom and your Grandparents.

Dee74

congratulations on 30 days melivin
let us know what happens today.

D

soberclover

Congratulations on your 30 days!!! That is huge! It is also great that you were courageous enough to tell your grandparents the truth; it is so much better then hiding. The reality is that you will have many more jobs in your life. This one may not fit you anymore

melivinsober

Thank you all so much.

I did get fired. But it's okay. Because like a few of you said, new opportunities are around me. I am sober and I am going to my AA meeting tomorrow to get my chip.

And you know? It is quite amazing to go through all of your emotions with a clear head. I haven't done that in a while. I feel blessed right now.

Thank you all for commenting and for being here. Your insight and support helps me daily to get through this new change.

sugarbear1

Hugs

Your better job will come!!

Be useful, attend some extra meetings....

I wish you well!

Dee74

best of luck in your new chapter

D

TigerLili

I'm sorry to hear abour your job loss, melivinsober. Onwards and upwards.